Anyone done a Foreign Wedding?

Imho go and look for an English speaking wedding planner in Spain. There are a few really good ones around, they're very experienced and know all the ways to make it work, especially with cost effectiveness for guests. They are really worth their money and make the cross country planning so much easier because they are veterans with local customs.
I don't actually know anyone in the Barcelona area but I'm sure if you dig a bit you'll find someone.

You need a Spanish wedding planner if your getting married in Spain. It’s not something you can organize yourself as they’re very fussy on documents red tape etc

OP,

You know as well as many others, that a Destination Wedding is quite expensive for the guests. I wish you well, but you may find many a decline to your invitations.

Just be prepared for that, and also putting pressure on people to travel abroad is different to travelling an hour or so within Ireland too.

There is the annual leave required for this, and childcare to take into consideration too.

Just think it through and suss out the availability of your guests before deciding anything big would be my advice.

FWIW there is no way I would travel abroad for a wedding unless I was sister/brother. And even then I would give the B+G the evil eye!

saoirse88 wrote: »

Hi, I was wondering if any of the extremely helpful people on here have any advice?

Bascially myself and my fiancee want to try and get married close to Barcelona. It makes the most sense as it's somewhere we love to visit but also it's so accessible for everyone from Ireland with so many flights to El Prat and Salou daily.

I know it's a serious cost on everyone so that's also why Barcelona is appealing because return flights often work out at less than 100 euro. There's been a lot of weddings recently, within our group of friends and family, and they've all been in Ireland and quite a few have commented that they're sick of the typical Irish wedding now.

So we want to try and make it as cost effective for everyone involved. There's a venue we've been to in Rome, Borgo di Tragliata, and that would be exactly what we'd be looking for. Everything from accom to church is onsite and very reasonable for all the guests. The problem with this venue is we've been to a wedding there already and are due to go to two more in the next 12 months so we can't really book it. We need somewhere that has onsite accom for roughly 100-120 people.

What I'm wondering is, does anyone know if there is anything similar in or around Catalonia? Or somewhere else that's just as accessible and cheap? We've been searching but can't find anything.

Thanks in advance for any help

Sick of the typical Irish wedding means they are sick of two hours in the church followed by a long drive to the venue, hang around until 6 for reception, followed by speeches, band, DJ, as the vast majority of Irish weddings are like that. It doesn't mean they necessarily want to spend a fortune going abroad. Be mindful of that.

Barcelona making the most sense, because you like it and there are lots of flights... by all means have a destination wedding, but don't try and convince yourself that it makes the most sense for everyone. It will work out cheaper for you and your fiance, but will almost certainly be more expensive for all of your guests. Not to mind the need for some of them to take annual leave to go.

Don't see why you can't go to the Rome venue just because other people have had their wedding there?

If you want a Spanish wedding you probably need to look for a Spanish wedding planner and get quotes and take it from there.

saoirse88 wrote: »

We completely understand that it's more expensive, what I mean about Barcelona making the most sense is, that out of all European destinations, it's probably the cheapest because of the quantity of direct flights.

We would look to try and offset some of the guests' expense with a free bar etc.

Regarding the Rome wedding, a close friend of mine is getting married there next summer and we more than likely will get married next summer also. I'm not usually fussed about what others would think but I don't want her to feel like I'm stealing her thunder in any way. Plus flights to Rome are more expensive.

Your hearts are set on Barcelona so go for it. I think what some posters are saying is that lots of Irish people (including yourselves!) are becoming jaded with the now traditional ostentatious, slightly vulgar, Irish style weddings.
That doesn’t mean though that they’d be thrilled either with a foreign wedding. It still involves looking for annual leave and at least 2 nights in a hotel, spending lots of euros on uncomfortable clothes and loads of hanging around, but you’ve also to add on passports airports Ryanair hire cars and suitcases of 10kg.
Have the wedding you want, as long as you accept that your invites will be greeted with groans by at least some of your guests, and don’t be offended if some of those find they’ve something else “on” that weekend.
Best of luck.

A close friend is getting married next summer in Rome and you want to get married in Barcelona the same summer? Presumably quite a few would be expected to go to both?

saoirse88 wrote: »

Ideally Barcelona is where we want it. But there are a few cons, those being, the cost on others and the hassle. We’d like to compensate people in some way, by offering a free bar or something. I suppose it’ll all depend on the difference between Ireland, cost wise.

Regarding the groans, I completely accept that too. And to be honest, I think no matter where we get married some will react like that. I react like that myself when a colleague or a distant friend sends me an invite to a wedding that’s 3 hours down the country. Having a wedding abroad will whittle down the numbers and hopefully those that truely want to be there will go. But I am mindful that some just don’t have the money.

I don't think a wedding three hours down the country and a wedding in Barcelona are comparable. The vast majority of people have to travel some distance to a wedding in Ireland, unless both the bride and groom are from the same town and holding the reception locally. Only difference is people can leave the wedding early and come home if they want. They will have to go to Barcelona for a minimum of three days. It's not like for like.


It does sound like you're going for the foreign option to keep your own costs down. You're perfectly entitled to do that, but it will already work out cheaper for you as you are unlikely to have 200 people flying out to Barcelona, and you already know that. But if you let slip to anyone that you're not providing any freebies like a free bar because you are trying to keep costs down (which you are already doing by going abroad), it will not go down well because your guests are already picking up the cost of your destination wedding.

Bear in mind that Spanish weddings start much later and this will likely affect your choice of venue as they're not the most accommodating when it comes to changing their timetables. For example, my friend is getting married in Madrid in July and the ceremony starts at 7pm.

saoirse88 wrote: »

Thanks for that.

We’re not completely sold on the foreign wedding idea signed, because of the hassle for everyone. But I really don’t want your typical Irish wedding and there doesn’t seem to be anywhere really on the west coast that offers something different .

What do you want from your wedding? A lot of hotels etc are used to offering the standard reception, but what exactly are you looking for? If you have an idea of what you would like that is different, then maybe it might be easier to find a venue that can provide what you want rather than expecting them to offer something different in their brochure.

To be fair the reason so many weddings are the same is that there are certain things that have to happen on the day so what has evolved into the standard Irish wedding is that way for a reason. The Spanish wedding isn't likely to be wildly different only that you will probably have better weather.


Do you want a small number of guests or a large number?
Church or civil ceremony?
Full on reception or a small group of immediately friends and family to dinner?
Music and entertainment?


Most people want these things in some form or other, so weddings end up being quite similar.


A guy I work with didn't want the big wedding with all bells and whistles, himself and the wife had a civil ceremony locally with less than 20 people at it, they had then booked a private room in a local hotel for that small group for a meal that afternoon. They were going to finish it there, but in the end decided to hire the function room and have a party later that night.

So basically they dispensed with the full on reception for 200 people with speeches etc. Guests were delighted they could rock up at 9 or 10 that night, less expense, less hassle getting time off work, many came after work without having to take the day off, much more casual vibe, plenty of women while dressed up for the night out didn't go the whole nine yards on going to the beauty salon to get hair and nails done and wearing a new dress. It was great craic. No long drawn out day for the guests.

Why exactly do you want to get married abroad? Do you have a connection to the place?
We got married twice in Ireland, once was no frills registry office and our 'wedding' was a more standard Irish affair a week later, we had a humanist ceremony and then the wedding reception all in one venue.
You refer to the cost of flights but that is going to be an additional expense. Flying abroad is never just the cost of the tickets, you've got transport to the airport, time involved, hassle etc.
We travelled to a sibling's wedding abroad. We didn't go crazy with costs but it was still a hefty chunk of change and TBH I struggled to see why they needed to bring everyone over to a place we all had no interest in going to. I'd not have missed the wedding but it was a lot of time and expense when a ceremony and meal out in Ireland would have done the same thing.
Your wedding though.

splinter65 wrote: »

I think most under 35 singles with no kids enjoy Irish weddings...and that’s it. I think anyone else if you asked them to be honest and think about it would say it’s a lot of work and expense and time to repeat the same day over and over. Same people same hotels same food..
If I had to describe the perfect wedding for me from the point of view of a guest I suppose it would be the English model.
Waking up in my own home and having a leisurely breakfast before getting ready in my own home doing my own hair and make up and dressing smart casual before driving for not more than 1 hour to the wedding venue that lasts not more then 3/4 hour followed by a very short drive to a venue where the B&G arrive within an hour and nice hot food is served as soon as they arrive.
The rest of the evening is spent relaxing, enjoying a few drinks, bit of music and the whole thing wrapped up no later then 10.30 but if you want to leave before then it’s not a question of having to sneak off.
I’d like the entire party to be small enough that the B&G get to only invite the guests that they actually want, not people who they’re expected to invite.
I think if every B&G only invited who they really wanted then any wedding would have no more then 100 tops.
That’s it for me.
I’ve stayed away from 3 foreign weddings I’ve been invited too. One of the brides was very affronted by my “regret” and shunned me for a year after. When she decided that I’d been sufficiently punished she decided to bring me back into the fold and then was surprised to find that I had moved on.

I'd say the exact opposite to this.
Its the older generation that enjoy the typical Irish wedding as its what they are used to and get to talk to their neighbours/ cousins / friends.
Single Under 35's would much prefer to pick where to spend their Fri/Sat night rather than be stuck at a wedding with aunts and uncles asking them why they are on their own!!

saoirse88 wrote: »

I suppose what’s holding me back is those people that want to go but can’t financially, who’ll either not go or end up going and put themselves under pressure.

Is there any way of doing it cheaply where you can then pass on the savings to your guests?

How much can you realistically fork out to pass savings onto guests? Paying for drinks for the day is a bit of a saving but people will have to pay flights transfers at least 2 nights in a hotel plus spending money. Also airport parking and time off work. It’s expensive for people to go to as it’s at least a night more than a wedding at home plus all these extras. Unless your paying for peoples hotels or something there is very little you can do to soften the blow.