Originally Posted by bobsman
Oh god, I'm so sorry. How do you cope day by day? If you don't mind me asking. I'm torn up that my friend is tormented when she has time alone. She is so strong and positive.
My apologies for the slow reply. I try to plan fun things to do so I have something to look forward to in the future. As you know already this can be difficult if you are on treatment as exhaustion levels can be high. I wrote a bucket list. Some of the things on it were ridiculous like climbing Kilimanjaro (probably wouldn't even if healthy) and some were cheap and simple like walking around the streets of Dublin, one last time, on a sunny day. Well today I went for a long walk through a part of Dublin I've never been to before. No sunshine but that's Ok, maybe on another day, energy levels permitting.
I try to read as much as possible but I find myself getting bored really easily, ditto for any hobbies. Daytime TV is to be avoided. I despise it. I'm toying with learning a second language. The thing about terminal cancer is it starts to become your identity and it will torment you if you let it. I would give anything to just be cancer free for even 5 minutes.
Sorry I don't have more advice I would just tell her to try and keep busy even with silly things. When I was on chemo and was in bed a lot I bought a really complicated picture puzzle to kill the boredom. This is not what I would normally be into but just perfect when I had "chemo brain". Also, I gave mindfulness a try and art therapy. Mindfulness was good and you do this anywhere even away from the group I attended. I would give it 3/5 stars. It works better for some people though so worth a shot. Art therapy was excellent but I had to stop going as I was too tired. I might try again though.
Playing with my dog also helps even if it is just rolling a ball down the hallway of my house. I know when an activity is taking my mind off my illness as i might go an hour or more without thinking "cancer". I totally sympathise with your friend as cancer is the first thing I think about in the morning and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep. It is very easy to become tormented when alone. Wishing you and her all the best, and much peace and happiness.