Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi all,
Vanilla are planning an update to the site on April 24th (next Wednesday). It is a major PHP8 update which is expected to boost performance across the site. The site will be down from 7pm and it is expected to take about an hour to complete. We appreciate your patience during the update.
Thanks all.

Overheard on Dublin Bus

2

Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 21,517 ✭✭✭✭Tell me how


    3 teenagers: Hi Anne
    Granny; Aw howya lads, what are yas upto
    3 teenagers: Ah just heading into shops
    Granny; Suppose you're eyeing up all the young ones

    ....

    Granny; Here love see that young lad there he fancies you, him in in the red

    ....

    Granny; Why didnt yas get off and folly them lads
    3 teenagers; not going our way

    .....


    Granny; Bye lads - dont do anything bad but if you do wear something

    If that was a Granda instead of a Granny then there would be a totally different vibe about this post.


  • Registered Users Posts: 156 ✭✭bisounours


    On the Aircoach, two Americans arguing:

    "Well, I'm more Irish than you! At least I was BORN here."

    "Yeah, well, my mom's name is Mary Fitzgerald!"


  • Site Banned Posts: 167 ✭✭Yakkyda


    Stupid fcukin teenagers playing their sh!tty fcukin music and the goddamn muthafckin loudspeaker!!

    Pisses me off no end, dopey little sh!tags, bloody height of ignorance (I know they do be young, but at 14-16 or so you'd think they'd have the copy on to realise this might annoy other passengers?!?)

    Rant over.


  • Registered Users Posts: 21,517 ✭✭✭✭Tell me how


    Yakkyda wrote:
    Stupid fcukin teenagers playing their sh!tty fcukin music and the goddamn muthafckin loudspeaker!!


    Yakkyda = Samuel L Jackson :)


  • Site Banned Posts: 167 ✭✭Yakkyda


    Yakkyda = Samuel L Jackson :)
    Nah, just his speech therapist. He used to have a terrible stutter.


  • Advertisement
  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 178 ✭✭BenedrylPete


    Overheard:

    ABAWAY... BABADO BAMAMUMU..aaahh hehehe ...Babadu mamawuno recruitment company ...ahhh babadulu social welfare abuluwamo abado HAHAHA.

    Also:
    tak zytslcic viztic sclychik preznezik recruitment company plyszik riznik vlyznich social welfare blazik vlyznk.

    Also:
    peng tong ping pang tong pang bing bong recruitment company ping pang ming mang social welfare bing bong.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,748 ✭✭✭Cunny-Funt


    Going through Dun Laoghaire. All of a sudden out of no where old lady sitting behind us just states loudly in a really posh south side accent

    "Your in Ireland you should speak only Irish or English".

    Was only after that that I noticed two Asian women were having a very quite conversation with each other in their language. Just made me so ****in angry. Women probably see's herself as the height of society and so on when all she is is a racist scumbag.

    Its just so hypocritical considering we had to travel to other countries for work for so many years too. I always get embarrassed for my country when I catch an irish person being racist. Pisses me off so much. The raw lack of human understanding an intelligence. Like BenedrylPete up there ^


    A positive story was as follows:

    Was running for the 145 on O'Connell street when my backpack unzipped with all the running and a bottle of beer flew out onto the road and smashed.

    Much do the delight of random knacks walkin past.

    Got on the bus and the driver was this smiley African bloke and he refused my leap card and said "saw you dropped your beer man, no charge".

    ****in sound. :cool:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 607 ✭✭✭sonny.knowles


    Cunny-Funt wrote: »
    Going through Dun Laoghaire. All of a sudden out of no where old lady sitting behind us just states loudly in a really posh south side accent

    "Your in Ireland you should speak only Irish or English".

    Was only after that that I noticed two Asian women were having a very quite conversation with each other in their language. Just made me so ****in angry. Women probably see's herself as the height of society and so on when all she is is a racist scumbag.

    Its just so hypocritical considering we had to travel to other countries for work for so many years too. I always get embarrassed for my country when I catch an irish person being racist. Pisses me off so much. The raw lack of human understanding an intelligence. Like BenedrylPete up there ^


    A positive story was as follows:

    Was running for the 145 on O'Connell street when my backpack unzipped with all the running and a bottle of beer flew out onto the road and smashed.

    Much do the delight of random knacks walkin past.

    Got on the bus and the driver was this smiley African bloke and he refused my leap card and said "saw you dropped your beer man, no charge".

    ****in sound. :cool:

    Random knacks. Stay classy.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,298 ✭✭✭DareGod


    On the 40 from town the other evening, I listened to a mother very loudly teaching her 2 year old daughter in a buggy how to say "I'll batter ye!"


  • Registered Users Posts: 21,517 ✭✭✭✭Tell me how


    This wasn't Dublin Bus but I thought of this thread when I heard it.

    Was in a shop this evening, a lady was there with her son. He kept wandering away and she kept calling him back; "Antiny! Come here to me!" "Antiny" kept wandering again.

    For a finish she said "Antiny, you'll get a slap and a half if you don't come back here"

    Antiny returned at this point, obviously that additional half slap is not to be ignored.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 10,691 ✭✭✭✭blueser


    This wasn't Dublin Bus but I thought of this thread when I heard it.

    Was in a shop this evening, a lady was there with her son. He kept wandering away and she kept calling him back; "Antiny! Come here to me!" "Antiny" kept wandering again.

    For a finish she said "Antiny, you'll get a slap and a half if you don't come back here"

    Antiny returned at this point, obviously that additional half slap is not to be ignored.
    If it was on Dublin Bus, it'd be "Anto", surely, wha?


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 27,107 CMod ✭✭✭✭spurious


    Ahn-inee.


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,691 ✭✭✭✭blueser


    spurious wrote: »
    Ahn-inee.
    If it was my neck of the woods (Manchester), it'd be "Ant'ny".


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 640 ✭✭✭Turtle_


    Also not on the bus but feck it...


    Couple around 60ish sit down at the table beside me. Waitress (foreign) informs them that the soup of the day is Celeriac.

    "What did you say?"

    "Celeriac"

    *couple look at each other puzzled* "Cellaari...?"

    "Celeriac"

    "Oh CELERY!"

    At this point the man decides to rather inappropriately inspect the girl's name tag (pinned on her chest :eek:)

    Waitress goes away and he looks over at me laughing a little

    "Hard to understand the accents, all that over celery"

    me: "eh, it's celeriac.."


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,397 ✭✭✭droidman123


    Has this thread more lies than any other thread in the history of boards?


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,298 ✭✭✭✭Collie D


    Has this thread more lies than any other thread in the history of boards?

    Would you believe me if I gave an answer?


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,397 ✭✭✭droidman123


    Collie D wrote: »
    Would you believe me if I gave an answer?

    No :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 40,787 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    Has this thread more lies than any other thread in the history of boards?

    Everything I put here was true

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • Registered Users Posts: 8,354 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    Everything I put here was true

    Even this post.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,882 ✭✭✭JuliusCaesar


    On the 747 airport bus, driver announces "Terminal 2", American tourist asks "Which is the international terminal?"

    Everyone looks puzzled.

    They're both international. Not like we have a terminal dedicated to national flights.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 10,691 ✭✭✭✭blueser


    On the 747 airport bus, driver announces "Terminal 2", American tourist asks "Which is the international terminal?"

    Everyone looks puzzled.

    They're both international. Not like we have a terminal dedicated to national flights.
    Perhaps they do at the airport nearest to where the yank lives. Being such a vast country, I'd imagine that there are a LOT of internal flights. I wouldn't fancy travelling from New York to LA overland. And he might have thought that any airport in a capital city (regardless of population) would have a terminal for internal flights only. That's all I can imagine in this case.


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,206 ✭✭✭✭JohnCleary


    On the 747 airport bus, driver announces "Terminal 2", American tourist asks "Which is the international terminal?"

    Everyone looks puzzled.

    They're both international. Not like we have a terminal dedicated to national flights.

    I've been to plenty of airports that have separate terminals for domestic / international.

    Heck, i've been to countries that have separate AIRPORTS for domestic / international.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,073 ✭✭✭JohnnyChimpo


    On the 747 airport bus, driver announces "Terminal 2", American tourist asks "Which is the international terminal?"

    Everyone looks puzzled.

    They're both international. Not like we have a terminal dedicated to national flights.

    It's a perfectly reasonable question though. Did ye expect some young fella American to know how many domestic flights the average Irish person takes, and whether that was enough to justify a separate terminal or not?


  • Posts: 0 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Overheard on the 145 about three years ago.

    "He's too bleedin' lazy to get a job. If I had four kids I'd be out trying to find a job, but he's too lazy."
    "Why doesn't he get a hold of some coke and start selling it?"
    "Are ye deaf? I told ye he's too bleedin' lazy to get a job!"


  • Site Banned Posts: 12,341 ✭✭✭✭Faugheen


    Not on a Dublin Bus, but on a bus from Dublin...

    It was a British woman, and she was sat a couple of rows behind me. She seemed...er..nice. Anyway, she rang someone on the phone and this is legit what she said.

    'My episode on Jeremy Kyle is going out on fursday. Yeah on fursday and we're having a party'

    There was a girl in front of me to started sniggering, then eventually put her phone against her ear and pretended she was laughing to her mate on the phone.


  • Registered Users Posts: 669 ✭✭✭josephryan1989


    Typical Joe Duffy conversation:

    Joe: I've Tom on the line. Howye Tom? What do you have to say?
    Tom: Jow? Jow? Kin ye hair may?
    Joe: Go ahead Tom.
    Tom: Howye Jow! Eoy winne complayen boat da junkie schyum arount da citee.
    Joe: What happened to you Tom?
    Tom: Eye woz taggin de granchilders te da zoo Jow an bot dem sum eyes kreem cowens da udder dayee an ah fuggin junkie...scuze me lankwidge Jow....cam unta de buzz
    Joe: Sorry Tom. Don't be using swear words live on air. It's a family show.
    Tom: Fu..Surrey Jow. Janey. Hannyhoe da junkie schtarded cuttin himself Jow...
    Joe: Dear oh dear..
    Tom: Der woz blud heavrywhirr Jow! Haul hover da buzz! Cuttin himschelf wid a blate Jow!
    Joe: Tsk Tsk Tsk Tsk...
    Tom: Blud schplashin un da sealing Jow! Wurse Jow! Der woz blud un da cones Jow! De kids wer kureyehen Jow!
    Joe: Dear oh dear!
    Tom: Eye woz en da Leb Jow! I dit meye bit fur Eyerlan! Itz knot gud enuf Jow


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 178 ✭✭BenedrylPete


    Cunny-Funt wrote: »
    . The raw lack of human understanding an intelligence. Like BenedrylPete up there ^



    ****in sound. :cool:

    Youre the reason that any humor with any racial context, no matter how harmless, must be hidden and stiffled.


  • Site Banned Posts: 167 ✭✭Yakkyda


    Cunny-Funt wrote: »
    Going through Dun Laoghaire. All of a sudden out of no where old lady sitting behind us just states loudly in a really posh south side accent

    "Your in Ireland you should speak only Irish or English".

    Was only after that that I noticed two Asian women were having a very quite conversation with each other in their language. Just made me so ****in angry. Women probably see's herself as the height of society and so on when all she is is a racist scumbag.

    Its just so hypocritical considering we had to travel to other countries for work for so many years too. I always get embarrassed for my country when I catch an irish person being racist. Pisses me off so much. The raw lack of human understanding an intelligence. Like BenedrylPete up there ^


    A positive story was as follows:

    Was running for the 145 on O'Connell street when my backpack unzipped with all the running and a bottle of beer flew out onto the road and smashed.

    Much do the delight of random knacks walkin past.

    Got on the bus and the driver was this smiley African bloke and he refused my leap card and said "saw you dropped your beer man, no charge".

    ****in sound. :cool:

    There's nice people and dickheads everywhere. Height of society types, tend not to be bussing it, just the type that think their above people. And they my friends are the worst kind.


  • Registered Users Posts: 919 ✭✭✭Joe prim


    Dublin, not California.

    Dublin is in California, dude.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dublin,_California


  • Advertisement
  • Site Banned Posts: 167 ✭✭Yakkyda


    Has this thread more lies than any other thread in the history of boards?

    I posted a pretty unbelievable one earlier, but I'll swear to whatever deity takes your fancy it's true. Use the buses regularly and you WILL see the kind of stuff posted.


Advertisement