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Tipping on your wedding day

  • 30-03-2019 2:43pm
    #1
    prettyrestless
    Registered Users Posts: 444 ✭✭


    I was wondering if tipping is the norm on your wedding day?

    I was planning on leaving a tip for the wedding planner in the hotel and the waiting staff, but I wasn’t planning on tipping the photographer/band/hairdresser etc.

    Did you tip anyone on your wedding day or do you plan to?


Comments

  • #2
    Loveinapril
    Registered Users Posts: 2,326 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    I didn't. The whole thing already cost a fortune and everyone was paid for the service they provided.


  • #3
    mikemac2
    Registered Users Posts: 2,926 ✭✭✭mikemac2


    Tipping is for low paid staff and most in the list especially the planner are not

    The only people on the list who you might consider are the bar staff and waiting staff who will be a on a shade more than minimum wage. I had that job and it’s massively appreciated but not expected. You are still going to get the same great service

    If you give to the hotel the management will pocket it or it goes to the mythical “Christmas party”


  • #4
    elperello
    Registered Users Posts: 14,227 ✭✭✭✭elperello


    It is normal to tip staff ie. employees for good service.
    It is not normal to tip people who are the principals of a firm/business supplying goods or services ie. the people you are directly paying.


  • #5
    Gatica
    Registered Users Posts: 3,296 ✭✭✭Gatica


    We gave the hotel money to tip the waiting staff on the night. Whether they passed that on though, I dunno..


  • #6
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 3,637 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Gatica wrote: »
    We gave the hotel money to tip the waiting staff on the night. Whether they passed that on though, I dunno..

    They didn’t.


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  • #7
    Mrs OBumble
    Registered Users Posts: 25,666 ✭✭✭✭Mrs OBumble


    elperello wrote: »
    It is normal to tip staff ie. employees for good service.

    It is normal in the USA. Most posters here don't live there, though.


  • #8
    LouD2016
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 229 ✭✭LouD2016


    I worked in hotels and dealt with weddings for years.

    You only need to tip the waiting & bar staff.

    If you are especially happy with wedding planner and got on well - a bouquet of flowers would be enough as a nice gesture :)

    The rest there is no need and it wouldn't be expected.


  • #9
    elperello
    Registered Users Posts: 14,227 ✭✭✭✭elperello


    Mrs OBumble wrote: »
    It is normal in the USA. Most posters here don't live there, though.

    Tightwad :)


  • #10
    Faith
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,654 Mod ✭✭✭✭Faith


    elperello wrote: »
    Tightwad :)

    Mod note: A smiley face doesn’t excuse rudeness. Don’t post like that here again please.


  • #11
    Purple Mountain
    Registered Users Posts: 12,995 ✭✭✭✭Purple Mountain


    Are you doing a church ceremony?
    Don't forget to take care of the sarcristian and altar servers if you have them.
    They're giving their time voluntarily.

    To thine own self be true



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  • #12
    elperello
    Registered Users Posts: 14,227 ✭✭✭✭elperello


    Faith wrote: »
    Mod note: A smiley face doesn’t excuse rudeness. Don’t post like that here again please.

    Sorry.
    Apologies for any offence caused.


  • #13
    prettyrestless
    Registered Users Posts: 444 ✭✭prettyrestless


    Purple Mountain wrote: »
    Are you doing a church ceremony?
    Don't forget to take care of the sarcristian and altar servers if you have them.
    They're giving their time voluntarily.

    No we're having a humanist ceremony in the hotel which is why I was thinking the waiting/bar staff would deserve a tip as they will be looking after us all day.

    Thanks everyone for your input :)


  • #14
    Obvious Desperate Breakfasts
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,474 ✭✭✭Obvious Desperate Breakfasts


    JayZeus wrote: »
    They didn’t.

    I don’t know. In the various restaurants and hotel jobs I had, some of my bosses absolutely would have passed it on, some wouldn’t.


  • #15
    Always Tired
    Closed Accounts Posts: 945 ✭✭✭Always Tired


    prettyrestless wrote: »
    No we're having a humanist ceremony in the hotel which is why I was thinking the waiting/bar staff would deserve a tip as they will be looking after us all day.

    Thanks everyone for your input :)

    Having had that job for 3 years in college this is the best thing to do and is massively appreciated. Th amount of work that goes into setting up and cleaning up these parties can be massive, and is all done by the wait and bar staff. I used to have to take apart the dance floor at five in the morning, dirty heavy piece by dirty heavy piece and put it on trolleys after serving all night, along with a heavy stage, in addition to the other cleaning.

    But you'd be surprised how few times any of us got any tip. The managers pocket it all if you give it to them or they split it with all the managers and staff and you end up with 3 euro. Only if someone puts it right in your hand would you get anything.

    Having said that, I never expected anything and it was the height of the recession. It was so rare to get tipped I never thought about it.


  • #16
    JustAThought
    Registered Users Posts: 5,323 ✭✭✭JustAThought


    Purple Mountain wrote: »
    Are you doing a church ceremony?
    Don't forget to take care of the sarcristian and altar servers if you have them.
    They're giving their time voluntarily.

    Oh no they're not. Out of the Church fee e60 goes to the sacristan. Cash only -no paye or prsi. Ministers of the Eucharist and alterboys/girls are voluntary & they don't get paid.


  • #17
    tiredblondie
    Registered Users Posts: 706 ✭✭✭tiredblondie


    Always Tired wrote: »
    Having had that job for 3 years in college this is the best thing to do and is massively appreciated. Th amount of work that goes into setting up and cleaning up these parties can be massive, and is all done by the wait and bar staff. I used to have to take apart the dance floor at five in the morning, dirty heavy piece by dirty heavy piece and put it on trolleys after serving all night, along with a heavy stage, in addition to the other cleaning.

    But you'd be surprised how few times any of us got any tip. The managers pocket it all if you give it to them or they split it with all the managers and staff and you end up with 3 euro. Only if someone puts it right in your hand would you get anything.

    Having said that, I never expected anything and it was the height of the recession. It was so rare to get tipped I never thought about it.

    It's the waiting staff and bar staff that i would be considering tipping but how do you go about it without embarrassing anyone??!!
    Like you said, "only if someone puts it right in your hand" - if you have say 10 staff, do you line them up at the end of the night with their hands out :pac::pac:


  • #18
    redcuppatea
    Registered Users Posts: 15 ✭redcuppatea


    Our original wedding quote had a set tip to give. They struck it off when we asked about it quickly. But... seemed strange...


  • #19
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    tiredblondie wrote: »
    It's the waiting staff and bar staff that i would be considering tipping but how do you go about it without embarrassing anyone??!!
    Like you said, "only if someone puts it right in your hand" - if you have say 10 staff, do you line them up at the end of the night with their hands out :pac::pac:


    If you give it to management, you run a very probable risk of it never getting as far as the waiting staff.

    If you give it to a single wait staff, it's a possibility that they may pocket the lot.



    So I'd recommend from the years that I waited tables, to approach them when they are in a group - for example they are usually lining up by their station ready to clear away tables so approach the 2-3 that are nearby and hand them an envelope and tell them to share it with all wait staff. Do the same with the bar staff with a separate envelope.


  • #20
    Third_Echelon
    Registered Users Posts: 4,889 ✭✭✭Third_Echelon


    From around 16 to 21 I worked in a hotel that had 2 weddings pretty much every weekend. Never got a tip from the wedding party when I was a waiter/bar staff (that was mid 90s to early 00s).... It wasn't really the done thing.


  • #21
    rosmoke
    Registered Users Posts: 416 ✭✭rosmoke


    I'll never understand 'tips'. Why people pay twice for a service provided is beyond me.
    I've been a courier, poorest people will try and give you a tip, beers, sweets, I've received all.
    The ones who are better off are a bit smarter and don't pay twice for the service.
    I haven't refused it but I always thought it's stupid practice and never expected it, always done my job right regardless.


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  • #22
    Nobelium
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,093 ✭✭✭Nobelium


    I thought the OP was about "Tripping on your wedding day"


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