Do u think you need to be a bit of a bollox to get/keep a girlfriend

completedit wrote: »

Is that what keeps the spark alive? If the girl feels her partner could cheat on her and other women want him, this keeps her attention and attraction alive.

No, that's called psychological abuse.

Or just love and respect one another and have honest and open communication.

Ara I'm an aul fart I'm probably wrong.

completedit wrote: »

But what about the adage you always want what you can't have. What's stopping someone from just getting bored of you once they know they have you.

Then they weren't really the right person for you.

Do you wear a fedora?

Elemonator wrote:

I usually find that its people who are desperately insecure who would hold such a belief (not yourself OP, its a commonly held belief).

I dunno. Have you read his previous threads?

OP, I genuinely don't say this to be mean or unkind, but I think it's fair to say you have a pretty skewed view of male/female relationships and interaction. There is no great game at play. There is no giant secret you desperately need to unlock. Women are not some kind of communal vending machine you just need to put the "right" currency into until sex/companionship/whatever comes out. They're just people. Same as everyone else. I think you really need to work on losing this view you have of them as this "other" species and just treat them normally. You've had thread after thread after thread on this kind of topic and never once have I seen you describe a woman as anything even approaching normal terms.

I agree with the OP in principle .
getting comfortable in a relationship is a death knell.

I don't think you need to be a prick or anything but keeping yourself fit and carrying yourself with a bit of dash to keep yourself good looking and the ladies interested makes your lady think/ believe her man is worth something and worth holding on too. This of course can be elaborated hugely probably write a series of self help books on it tbh. But that's the premise..

contrast this with fellas who grows older and just stop trying. chubby football jersey man who treats his wife to super sunday in the local boozer will have a disinterested wife who'd bang the hot PT in the gym if she had the chance or he threw her the eye...or the local bouncer for a free G&T after hours....

maybe you just like starting silly threads but ill bite- no to your question.

respect, decency honesty and humour are the basis for any relationship

What youre describing is emotional abuse.
With that attitude and behavior the only women you will attract and keep (for a short time) will be highly insecure women that wont actually love you, your relationships will be filled with drama and emotional turmoil.
If you feel you need to manipulate vulnerable, insecure women with self esteem issues just to make someone stay with you, you have a very sad little existence.
You might want to work on your own self esteem and develop yourself a bit before you attempt to have a relationship with anyone.

You need to be confident in yourself and unafraid to stand up for yourself in a relationship. It's basic self respect.

And things like being confident, humorous, kind, and keeping your appearance up to scratch... they'll all show that you're a viable and valuable partner, which will keep your partner aware that you're a catch and not someone to just let go.

You don't need to convince someone you're gonna cheat on them, that's ridiculous.

paw patrol wrote: »

I agree with the OP in principle .
getting comfortable in a relationship is a death knell.

I don't think you need to be a prick or anything but keeping yourself fit and carrying yourself with a bit of dash to keep yourself good looking and the ladies interested makes your lady think/ believe her man is worth something and worth holding on too. This of course can be elaborated hugely probably write a series of self help books on it tbh. But that's the premise..

contrast this with fellas who grows older and just stop trying. chubby football jersey man who treats his wife to super sunday in the local boozer will have a disinterested wife who'd bang the hot PT in the gym if she had the chance or he threw her the eye...or the local bouncer for a free G&T after hours....

Yup, you want to keep being the man your lady feel in love with in the first place. Of course people change and grow but the basic building blocks of attraction must remain the same. Nothing wrong with being playful and a bit of teasing but never be a prick, I imagine that goes without saying.


Loads of lads make this mistake; the dating process never really ends. You've got to keep things exciting and interesting and don't take it for granted, it doesn't have to be anything mental or extravagant, just mix days/nights out and venues up from time to time, otherwise she will lose interest and seek same elsewhere in time.

Sardonicat wrote: »

Yes, because women have a herd mentality and we are all looking for exactly the same thing in a partner. Fickle beasts that we are, it's guaranteed we'll cheat if we get bored and the only way to keep us interested is to keep us entertained. The notion of being happy to just spend time with our partners is absolutely alien to us.

Why do you think many marriages fail or people cheat?

Women don't have a herd mentality and neither do men, but if you don't put in the effort in many cases men and women will up and leave and look for attention elsewhere.

Also as I clearly stated it doesn't have to be anything extravagant.

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

Why do you think many marriages fail or people cheat?

Women don't have a herd mentality and neither do men, but if you don't put in the effort in many cases men and women will up and leave and look for attention elsewhere.

Also as I clearly stated it doesn't have to be anything extravagant.

We just need to be trotted out on the odd outing, right? Just switch the venues round from time to time and we'll stay.

Marriages don't fail because he forgot to bring herself out for a spin/dinner/drinks.