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The Taylor-made CVPL Chat Thread!

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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,818 ✭✭✭Silent Running


    gozunda wrote: »
    KFS

    Kentucky Fried Squirrel ;)

    I'd be more concerned about KFR. :eek:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,764 ✭✭✭my3cents


    Nah its genuine KFC

    Kentucky Fried Chipmunk


  • Moderators, Arts Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 76,348 Mod ✭✭✭✭New Home


    Or Kentucky Fried Critter.

    This would've never happened to a vegetarian. :cool: :pac:


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    New Home wrote: »
    Or Kentucky Fried Critter.

    This would've never happened to a vegetarian. :cool: :pac:

    Kentucky fried carrot :p


  • Moderators, Arts Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 76,348 Mod ✭✭✭✭New Home


    That'd be one weird carrot.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 711 ✭✭✭Three More Big Sleeps


    It's an oar

    R in some irish accents come out as oar.

    Dara O'Briain's got a great piece on this:
    Certain things you just say differently, you don't have the letter "oar", you use the letter R which performs many of the same duties, but I really don't know how you can survive.

    I've got two letter "oars" in my name, I spell it out on the phone over here and I go, "D-A-Oar", People go "Oar? Like an oar? I draw a picture of an oar? What kind of hieroglyphic, pictographic shíte is this?"

    There's an oar and then a man walking like that and then a moon and then a cat, and I go, "R", and they go, "Good!"

    He finishes with his classic g-string-brazillion-vagina story. Well worth a watch.

    Link (1:24:40)


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,619 ✭✭✭Charlie-Bravo


    gozunda wrote: »
    KFS

    Kentucky Fried Squirrel ;)

    Scrat from Ice Age really does have a tough time chasing that Acorn.

    -. . ...- . .-. / --. --- -. -. .- / --. .. ...- . / -.-- --- ..- / ..- .--.



  • Registered Users Posts: 3,777 ✭✭✭KathleenGrant


    Dara O'Briain's got a great piece on this:
    Certain things you just say differently, you don't have the letter "oar", you use the letter R which performs many of the same duties, but I really don't know how you can survive.

    I've got two letter "oars" in my name, I spell it out on the phone over here and I go, "D-A-Oar", People go "Oar? Like an oar? I draw a picture of an oar? What kind of hieroglyphic, pictographic shíte is this?"

    There's an oar and then a man walking like that and then a moon and then a cat, and I go, "R", and they go, "Good!"

    He finishes with his classic g-string-brazillion-vagina story. Well worth a watch.

    Link (1:24:40)

    That link was brilliant. Laughed so hard.


  • Registered Users Posts: 25,404 ✭✭✭✭Timberrrrrrrr


    Dara O'Briain's got a great piece on this:
    Certain things you just say differently, you don't have the letter "oar", you use the letter R which performs many of the same duties, but I really don't know how you can survive.

    I've got two letter "oars" in my name, I spell it out on the phone over here and I go, "D-A-Oar", People go "Oar? Like an oar? I draw a picture of an oar? What kind of hieroglyphic, pictographic shíte is this?"

    There's an oar and then a man walking like that and then a moon and then a cat, and I go, "R", and they go, "Good!"

    He finishes with his classic g-string-brazillion-vagina story. Well worth a watch.

    Link (1:24:40)

    G for G-string :D brilliant!


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,215 ✭✭✭✭Suckit


    https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=110694176&postcount=7376

    Pretty sure I've never found out someody was a vegan and thought they were 'super healthy'..
    I never thought thy were 'probably nutrient deficient' either.
    My first thought would be "why did they just tell me they were vegan?"


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  • Registered Users Posts: 5,968 ✭✭✭TheIrishGrover


    Suckit wrote: »
    https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=110694176&postcount=7376

    Pretty sure I've never found out someody was a vegan and thought they were 'super healthy'..
    I never thought thy were 'probably nutrient deficient' either.
    My first thought would be "why did they just tell me they were vegan?"

    Because


  • Registered Users Posts: 13,762 ✭✭✭✭dubstarr


    The one with the Pandas on the tree.I dont get it


  • Moderators, Arts Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 76,348 Mod ✭✭✭✭New Home


    "Nobody expected the Spanish Inquisition!"


  • Registered Users Posts: 13,637 ✭✭✭✭josip


    New Home wrote: »
    "Nobody expected the Spanish Inquisition!"


    Fair enough, but what's the Spanish Inquisition got to do with loads of Pandas photoshopped onto a tree?


  • Moderators, Arts Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 76,348 Mod ✭✭✭✭New Home


    I bet you didn't expect it, when you were scrolling down through all those pandas...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,764 ✭✭✭my3cents


    New Home wrote: »
    I bet you didn't expect it, when you were scrolling down through all those pandas...

    I actually said to myself "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition" when I scrolled down but really I still didn't make the connection.

    I sort of thought ah there's a connection but its so lame that there must be some other joke there that I missed.


  • Registered Users Posts: 30,123 ✭✭✭✭Star Lord


    my3cents wrote: »
    I actually said to myself "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition" when I scrolled down but really I still didn't make the connection.

    I sort of thought ah there's a connection but its so lame that there must be some other joke there that I missed.

    Not high brow enough for you?

    image.jpeg

    :pac::D


  • Registered Users Posts: 78,245 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    Man caught at airport with half a kilo of cocaine hidden under his toupee

    image.jpg

    linky
    I thought this was one photo showing two people. I wondered why drug smugglers were wearing uniforms. D'oh!


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 90,695 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    Victor wrote: »
    I thought this was one photo showing two people. I wondered why drug smugglers were wearing uniforms. D'oh!
    There'll be hell to pay


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,143 ✭✭✭locum-motion


    napoleon.png

    Once again, what kind of psycho posts an XKCD comic and doesn't include the mouseover text?
    "Mr. President, what if the unthinkable happens? What if the launch goes wrong, and Napoleon is not stranded on the moon?" "Have Safire write up a speech."

    And if you don't get it, you can look it up on www.explainxkcd.com !


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,764 ✭✭✭my3cents


    inforfun wrote: »
    08eb4542403489aad1fc4e730ca4ef59.png

    We should really have a poll to see how many people here have cats because everyone gets the cat jokes :D















    - even me.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,758 ✭✭✭✭BattleCorp


    oFcBpcg.jpg

    I never understood why women had a problem with the toilet seat being up.

    Surely if the toilet seat is up, it hasn't been pi55ed on. Isn't that the whole notion of putting the seat up or down, not to have it pi55ed on?


  • Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 8,573 Mod ✭✭✭✭Wilberto


    I never got the whole toilet seat issue anyway. I mean, there's also a lid on the toilet. Why would anyone not put the lid down?

    That's what doesn't make sense to me.


  • Registered Users Posts: 13,637 ✭✭✭✭josip


    Apparently they have some sort of primeval fear of falling into the toilet and getting sucked into the underworld.
    The same 'logic' as their fear of spiders.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,758 ✭✭✭✭BattleCorp


    josip wrote: »
    Apparently they have some sort of primeval fear of falling into the toilet and getting sucked into the underworld.
    The same 'logic' as their fear of spiders.

    With the size of their ar5es, not a chance. :D:D:D:D:D


    Well, that comment has probably brought down a jihad on my ass. :D:D:D


  • Moderators, Arts Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 76,348 Mod ✭✭✭✭New Home


    BattleCorp wrote: »
    oFcBpcg.jpg

    I never understood why women had a problem with the toilet seat being up.

    Surely if the toilet seat is up, it hasn't been pi55ed on. Isn't that the whole notion of putting the seat up or down, not to have it pi55ed on?

    Why should it be pissed on in the first place? Can't you guys aim properly? Haven't you been toilet trained? Also, you forget about splashback some men leave, both on the inside of the lid, and on the seat itself, which we have to deal with when we have to use the toilet ourselves. Besides, men do one thing sitting up, and one sitting down, women do both sitting down - that makes 3:1. It's maths, really.

    Anyway, as Judy (she of Richard and Judy fame) once put it (and yes, I'm paraphrasing), try and go to the toilet in the middle of the night still half asleep and with the light off so your sleep won't be disrupted too much, then try and sit down and have your heart skip a beat because the toilet feels lower than it should be, only to get an arseful of cold ceramic in the end!


  • Registered Users Posts: 78,245 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    New Home wrote: »
    Anyway, as Judy (she of Richard and Judy fame) once put it (and yes, I'm paraphrasing), try and go to the toilet in the middle of the night still half asleep and with the light off so your sleep won't be disrupted too much, then try and sit down and have your heart skip a beat because the toilet feels lower than it should be, only to get an arseful of cold ceramic in the end!
    There's a variant of this where someone just plonked herself down. The hard ceramic was more of a problem than the cold ceramic.

    The flush on my toilet is, eh, zealous, so it's strictly 'seat down cover down' when flushing.


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 90,695 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    Wilberto wrote: »
    I never got the whole toilet seat issue anyway.

    https://i.imgur.com/wMBEeHB.mp4


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    BattleCorp wrote: »
    With the size of their ar5es, not a chance. :D:D:D:D:D


    Well, that comment has probably brought down a jihad on my ass. :D:D:D
    Here it comes...
    cute_pics-funny_pictures_of_animals-3759_1880_donkey-sniper.jpg


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  • Registered Users Posts: 7,748 ✭✭✭ganmo


    New Home wrote: »
    Why should it be pissed on in the first place? Can't you guys aim properly? Haven't you been toilet trained? Also, you forget about splashback some men leave, both on the inside of the lid, and on the seat itself, which we have to deal with when we have to use the toilet ourselves. Besides, men do one thing sitting up, and one sitting down, women do both sitting down - that makes 3:1. It's maths, really.

    Anyway, as Judy (she of Richard and Judy fame) once put it (and yes, I'm paraphrasing), try and go to the toilet in the middle of the night still half asleep and with the light off so your sleep won't be disrupted too much, then try and sit down and have your heart skip a beat because the toilet feels lower than it should be, only to get an arseful of cold ceramic in the end!

    Get a syringe, fill it up with water, stand in front of the toilet, aim the syringe at the toilet and push the plunger against your belly. Let's see how you do


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