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Why are most families houses and lives in a mess???

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    #62
    whisky_galore
    Registered Users Posts: 15,733 ✭✭✭✭whisky_galore


    riffmongous wrote: »
    Tidiness is overrated. It's a waste of energy in a futile attempt to fight entropy, to produce bland, sterile environments for the sake of satisfying some control freak impulse.

    Most eloquent reasoning to live in your own shyte.


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    #63
    v638sg7k1a92bx
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,913 ✭✭✭v638sg7k1a92bx


    lemonkey wrote: »
    Ah, I thought you were actually being serious until this post. Too obvious.

    The most obvious thing is it’s true!


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    #64
    riffmongous
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 12,625 Mod ✭✭✭✭riffmongous


    whisky_galore wrote: »
    Most eloquent reasoning to live in your own shyte.

    I even dumbed it down a little


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    #65
    SEPT 23 1989
    Registered Users Posts: 43,024 ✭✭✭✭SEPT 23 1989


    but in a tidy house you would never have the joy of stepping on Thomas the tank engine barefoot, hungover causing one to fall over a coffee table at 7am on a Sunday morning


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    #66
    dont bother
    Closed Accounts Posts: 542 ✭✭✭dont bother


    theres one of these families that live across the hall from me.
    there are two parents, twin children and a dog. they are all crammed into a tiny shoe-box apartment (i know because i can barely live in it with only 2 adults in mine).
    the chaos they live in is unreal. it's mental. they spend most of their time letting the kids play in the hall outside their front door, letting them play with the LIFT (the lift ffs!!) and basically take over the block and use the whole thing as their front room.

    they own a 2nd apartment upstairs which they let out for a hefty income. neither parent works a job.

    can somebody please tell me why, if you were those parents - you would not sell BOTH apartments and get a nice nice sum (its city centre so they'd be minted) and move to a house mortgage free?

    some people WANT to live their lives in chaos. that's the point im making.

    they dont care who they disrupt.
    you'd be sick of the sh!te - young parents thinking theyre so stressed and as if they're the first people on earth to ever have kids. this kind of "get out of our way, we are PARENTS!" type sh!te.

    cant abide it. fools


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    #67
    v638sg7k1a92bx
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,913 ✭✭✭v638sg7k1a92bx


    Lance-kun wrote: »
    It's very likely that some people want to give their children what they never had as youths.

    What’s that, a messy house and chaotic childhood with parents they see on evenings and weekends for a few hours?


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    #68
    SMC92Ian
    Registered Users Posts: 2,015 ✭✭✭SMC92Ian


    Lance-kun wrote: »
    It's very likely that some people want to give their children what they never had as youths.

    That's exactly it, if I was a parent I'd def be buying my child what they wanted.


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    #69
    v638sg7k1a92bx
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,913 ✭✭✭v638sg7k1a92bx


    handlemaster wrote: »
    That mess you are referring to is kids making memories.

    Seriously, this is a parents actual excuse. Millennials are the worst.


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    #70
    whisky_galore
    Registered Users Posts: 15,733 ✭✭✭✭whisky_galore


    SMC92Ian wrote: »
    That's exactly it, if I was a parent I'd def be buying my child what they wanted.

    How about a pony?


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    #71
    Hannibal_Smith
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,927 Mod ✭✭✭✭Hannibal_Smith


    Anyone comes into my house and looks around taking stock and being all judgy can turn around and f*ck off right back out.


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    #72
    SMC92Ian
    Registered Users Posts: 2,015 ✭✭✭SMC92Ian


    whisky_galore wrote: »
    How about a pony?

    I never wanted a pony. I'm talking a few toys and games etc. Maybe I missed the idea of what this thread is about?


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    #73
    Lillyfae
    Registered Users Posts: 1,800 ✭✭✭Lillyfae


    My nearly 3 year old has 2 small boxes of toys, all her colouring stuff and a play kitchen downstairs, plus books on shelves that she can reach both downstairs and in her room. We have a small open plan house so we can't fit any more or it will be chaos, and that doesn't make anyone happy. We cull regularly. She knows that she has to tidy everything up before she goes to bed in the afternoon and at night.

    We don't buy her new toys unless it's Christmas or her birthday. She's welcome to walk around a shop with something in her hand but she knows that it doesn't belong to her and she has to put it back where she got it before we leave. Last year on her birthday invitation, I specified to people that if they had age appropriate books/ toys at home already to feel free to regift- after her first birthday we learned our lesson, so much stuff that was immediately dumped or brought to the charity shop, it's so pointless and wasteful.

    We have a cleaner 2 hours per week for dusting, hoovering, mopping, cleaning the bathroom- the rest we just keep on top of and it's completely doable but we're lucky, we both work in flexible jobs (me 4 days and him 4.5 days) so she's in the creche 2.5 days and with nana 1 day. The creche and nana's house are exploding with toys AND she has a dog so has more than enough to keep her occupied without filling the house with rubbish. This would make none of us happy, I like cleanliness and order. My boyfriend would be worse than either me or my daughter in terms of clutter :pac:.

    Having said all that, I don't judge people who have messy houses but by that token don't think that it has to be that way- my favourite is that Facebook status that stay at home moms always seem to use about their houses being messy because their children are happy, loved and played with. My daughter is too, we just teach her that cleaning up is the end part of the playing.


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    #74
    CelticRambler
    Registered Users Posts: 6,695 ✭✭✭CelticRambler


    Gunnar Shrilling Saint wrote: »
    The replies from parents on this thread is very concerning. ... As parents you should know that it's not acceptable or conducive to a functional lifestyle if your home is not in order. Would you work in an office environment that had papers and files strewn all over the floor or you had to clear a space on your desk just so you could work on your laptop?

    Technically I'm still a parent, but it's been three months since any of the children were last in the house, and it'll be Christmas before two of them come back again.

    In the meantime, I've got a dead plant on the draining board, three saucepans in the sink, a pile of clean washing to be put away if I don't wear it first, half a chainsaw and most of a toolkit on the table, and three folders of paperworky stuff on the work top. The floor is (for some reason) inexplicably clear at the moment, at least in this room. Funnily enough, what you might call mess was created by a functional lifestyle and long may it continue. :p


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    #75
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 21,679 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    I don't know. I think it is possible to have children and not lots of mess. It depends on the family. My good friend has three kids and toys are in the playroom and their bedrooms. If they take something out then they put it back. When I was a child it was the same thing. There wasn't loads of toys lying about the place.


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    #76
    NSAman
    Registered Users Posts: 3,386 ✭✭✭NSAman


    OK cleaning takes time and effort.

    I am one of those people who cleans his house to a level most people would think crazy. I have two dogs which add to the problem and many many visitors. Would I be without any of the dogs and visitors? no way... they make life interesting.

    It is currently 5am, I am here taking a break from Ironing. When I arrive home after being away for 2 weeks work, the place was a mess. I hovered and washed floors after travelling for 12 hours.

    Some people like a spotless home, some don’t. I go to friends homes and the place looks like a bomb exploded in the middle of it. Frankly, it would drive me mad as it does one half of some of the friends (i.e. normally the husband). There is the excuse that “a house is for living in”, of course a house is for living in. That doesn’t mean that me as a visitor wants to see knickers on the floor.

    It really comes down to what your parents taught you to do. My Mother and father worked hard. We were taught to clean up after ourselves and have respect for the house as it cost a lot of hard earned money to get. Since a young age we always were taught how to wash, iron, mop and clean properly, our mother made it fun and we were always taught that if you clean up after yourself, it makes life easier... and it is true.


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    #77
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I'm 36, left home permanently at 19. My mother still finds bits of my lego in random places around the house. She sticks it together and will give me a pirate stuck to a yellow 2x6 with a sign on it that says police.

    So kids being messy is not a new phenomenon.


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    #78
    Claw Hammer
    Registered Users Posts: 6,160 ✭✭✭Claw Hammer


    I blame the parents!


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    #79
    victor8600
    Registered Users Posts: 1,606 ✭✭✭victor8600


    I am shocked, don't all family houses look like this? :pac:

    norris-family.jpg


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    #80
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    NSAman wrote: »
    It really comes down to what your parents taught you to do. My Mother and father worked hard. We were taught to clean up after ourselves and have respect for the house as it cost a lot of hard earned money to get. Since a young age we always were taught how to wash, iron, mop and clean properly, our mother made it fun and we were always taught that if you clean up after yourself, it makes life easier... and it is true.

    Your condescending feck-wittery is suggesting that my mother taught me to be the untidy individual that I am. Thank you for insulting my mother.

    I now want to introduce you to my ignore list.


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    #81
    Gregor Samsa
    Registered Users Posts: 8,907 ✭✭✭Gregor Samsa


    victor8600 wrote: »
    I am shocked, don't all family houses look like this? :pac:

    norris-family.jpg

    The only realistic thing about that photo is that it is physically impossible to get 3 kids to look at a camera at the same time.

    We have that Eames rocking chair too (in blue). Never sat in it, because it's constantly piled high with shíte.

    A white rug and sofa? The must own shares in Vanish.


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    #82
    partyguinness
    Registered Users Posts: 8,207 ✭✭✭partyguinness


    Gunnar Shrilling Saint wrote: »
    I’ve had the pleasure of being invited to several homes of young families recently and by young I mean new parents in their late 30’s and 40’s...

    I’m aghast at how much crap people accumulate in their homes! Ikea boxes full of kids toys shoved in corners. My experience is limited to Dublin where all the “young” families with their delusions of grandeur want to live in the south east part of Dublin in houses they can barely afford all the while their lives are in chaos with plastic toys strewn everywhere, both working, 2 cars, hand-balling kids, 9 - 5, dinner Seriously, one of the parents needs to stay home and organise their lives.


    Because it is their home and not a 'Show House' to impress the visitors. Do you have kids?

    We have a 3 and 7 yr old and yes we have been aghast at some of the other houses and the amount of crap everywhere. I mean entire rooms dedicated to toys etc.

    My SIL is extreme (they have the house already decorate in Halloween crap) and we refuse to visit the house. Even her parents hate going there with the amount of crap- the kids are horrible also if not weird (7 and 9).

    We keep our downstairs toy free as much as possible save for 1 item at a time. Quite frankly, I have no interest living in a creche.


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    #83
    Vote4Napoleon
    Registered Users Posts: 72 ✭✭Vote4Napoleon


    Food in the fridge, electricity, phone, few pints at the weekend occasionally, box of cigarettes that's about it for me, the simple life


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    #84
    victor8600
    Registered Users Posts: 1,606 ✭✭✭victor8600


    Gregor Samsa wrote: »
    The only realistic thing about that photo is that it is physically impossible to get 3 kids to look at a camera at the same time.

    Exactly, this photo is hilarious. White rugs and white clothes won't last half an hour, probably less with the orange juice spilled from the jug all over the room. A vase and a porcelain/gypsum head, framed pictures within the easy reach of babies? Just lol.


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    #85
    SEPT 23 1989
    Registered Users Posts: 43,024 ✭✭✭✭SEPT 23 1989


    victor8600 wrote: »
    I am shocked, don't all family houses look like this? :pac:

    norris-family.jpg

    white walls,couch and rugs

    perfect for young kids


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    #86
    Earthsnotflat
    Registered Users Posts: 33 ✭Earthsnotflat


    NSAman wrote: »
    OK cleaning takes time and effort.

    I am one of those people who cleans his house to a level most people would think crazy. I have two dogs which add to the problem and many many visitors. Would I be without any of the dogs and visitors? no way... they make life interesting.

    It is currently 5am, I am here taking a break from Ironing. When I arrive home after being away for 2 weeks work, the place was a mess. I hovered and washed floors after travelling for 12 hours.

    Some people like a spotless home, some don’t. I go to friends homes and the place looks like a bomb exploded in the middle of it. Frankly, it would drive me mad as it does one half of some of the friends (i.e. normally the husband). There is the excuse that “a house is for living in”, of course a house is for living in. That doesn’t mean that me as a visitor wants to see knickers on the floor.

    It really comes down to what your parents taught you to do. My Mother and father worked hard. We were taught to clean up after ourselves and have respect for the house as it cost a lot of hard earned money to get. Since a young age we always were taught how to wash, iron, mop and clean properly, our mother made it fun and we were always taught that if you clean up after yourself, it makes life easier... and it is true.

    Oh life would be so pretty if it was that simple. Just teach people to do right things and voilà, everything is done right. I think whenever you can actually achieve something good it's something to be immensely grateful for, that you have had strength, opportunities, health, some help, whatever, to have this good outcome.. my house is sometimes clean, more often than not mess, it's my choice and my priorities, to relax instead of doing the work I know I will have to do tomorrow again, it can wait. If you can pack everything in 24 hrs good on you, but is it or going to be like that every day of your life? We're not robots, sometimes I like to stand back and look at this mess called life philosophically and clean more important stuff first , it often means house just doesn't make it to the top of the list for the day


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    #87
    partyguinness
    Registered Users Posts: 8,207 ✭✭✭partyguinness


    Our biggest problem is the wife's parents. They are constantly buying toys- not us.

    The mother in law is Bree Van der Camp on steroids. The house is spotless and an ocean of boring beige. Late 60's and eff all else to do. For example, if you have a shower in their house you have to wipe down the bathroom completely and leave the bath bone dry. I kid you not- bone dry and there are towels and blades to assist.

    The thing is they buy any old crap when they are out and about. Not good quality long lasting toys- just rubbish they pick up on a weekly basis.

    We turned the tables on them and insisted that anything they buy must stay at their house. You could see my MILs eye twitching but it worked. Rather than filling our house with rubbish it stays at theirs- funnily enough they have now stopped buying all the crap.


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    #88
    partyguinness
    Registered Users Posts: 8,207 ✭✭✭partyguinness


    SEPT 23 1989 wrote: »
    white walls,couch and rugs

    perfect for young kids


    Perfect for hiding all the tomato sauce stains.


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    #89
    Graces7
    Registered Users Posts: 32,634 ✭✭✭✭Graces7


    partyguinness wrote: »
    Our biggest problem is the the wife's parents. They are constantly buying toys- not us.

    The funny thing is the mother in law is Bree Van der Camp on steroids. The houseis spotless and an ocean of boring beige. Late 60's and eff all else to do. For example, if you have a shower in their house you have to wipe down the bathroom completely and leave the bath bone dry. I kid you not- bone dry and there are towels and blades to assist.

    The thing is they buy any old crap when they are out and about. Not good quality long lasting toys- just rubbish they pick up on a weekly basis.

    We turned the tables on them and insisted that anything they buy must stay at their house. You could see my MILs eye twitching but it worked. Rather than filling our house with rubbish it stays at theirs- funnily enough they have now stopped buying all the crap.

    Neat; very neat ;)


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    #90
    Cyrus
    Registered Users Posts: 19,669 ✭✭✭✭Cyrus


    i get that the OP is trolling but we have 2 young kids and our house is pristine 99% of the time. Kids dont have to draw on walls, they dont have to have their bikes inside. All depends on what you want to do. You dont care, thats your own business. My wife and i spent a fortune on the house and like to have it the way WE want it, so the kids respect that, as i remember doing in my parents house when i was a kid.

    but everyone is different.

    most people want a tidy house, but very few people want to put the effort in to keep it that way, its a constant job.


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    #91
    Graces7
    Registered Users Posts: 32,634 ✭✭✭✭Graces7


    Not meaning squeaky clean and totally tidy. One friend I used to know had three girls, 6- 12, and they had completely invaded the whole downstairs. No room to walk in the hall; every seat in the sitting room piled with toys as was the floor. Just extremes. I got used to clearing part of a chair to perch on. There was no way they could find anything. That had stopped mattering

    I am very untidy but curb it with boxes and containers. As my mother taught me. And always we had to remove stuff from the living room and kitchen .


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