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The Dodgiest Santa down through the years

  • 11-11-2019 6:36pm
    #1


    So, down through the years did you encounter any particularly dodgy santa?
    This can be in the pub as well. If you were a Santa were you dodgy?


«1

Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 7,066 ✭✭✭MarkY91


    I don't have a story to add but this will be an interesting thread to follow. I think it's best suited for after hours for some epic stories


  • Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 8,490 Mod ✭✭✭✭Fluorescence


    Not a rant. Moved to After Hours


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,810 ✭✭✭Hector Savage


    A few years ago I saw a drunk homeless Santa in some square in Barcelona, my kid was about 4 and he innocently thought "Oh great a Santa", and he came over looking for money trying to use the kids interest to get some money for his next can of cider.

    Very sad.


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 12,468 Mod ✭✭✭✭JupiterKid


    When I think of Bad Santas I immediately think of Billy Bob Thornton as the amoral, venal, alcoholic Santa...


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,288 ✭✭✭✭branie2


    Agreed there


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  • Registered Users Posts: 12,131 ✭✭✭✭TheValeyard


    Bad Santa,

    great film.

    Fcuk Putin. Glory to Ukraine!





  • Trading Places preceded it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,587 ✭✭✭Feisar


    A few years ago I saw a drunk homeless Santa in some square in Barcelona, my kid was about 4 and he innocently thought "Oh great a Santa", and he came over looking for money trying to use the kids interest to get some money for his next can of cider.

    Very sad.

    Jeebus that's grim.

    First they came for the socialists...



  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,907 ✭✭✭Stevieluvsye


    This has taken me back to Dan Aykroyd chewing on half a roll and half his beard


  • Registered Users Posts: 24,135 ✭✭✭✭Sleepy


    Never met him myself but an ex of mine was molested by an in-store Santas when she sat on his knee as a small child in the mid-eighties. It's made me (perhaps unfairly) very wary of them as I'm sure they're all garda vetted these days. I suppose it's a sign of how much this country has changed for the better in the last 30 years that she wouldn't have felt she couldn't tell anyone had it happened nowadays.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 5,875 ✭✭✭Edgware


    Santa likes to give presents from his sac


  • Registered Users Posts: 147 ✭✭gnarbarian


    :eek: Nightmare Fuel! :eek:

    FowHz-1480443922-1263-blog-Creepy%20Santa%20Header.png




  • '' '' nice "Triptych"...

    Well after all I originally posted this thread I. R&R


  • Posts: 26,052 ✭✭✭✭[Deleted User]


    gnarbarian wrote: »
    :eek: Nightmare Fuel! :eek:

    FowHz-1480443922-1263-blog-Creepy%20Santa%20Header.png

    These all look like something you'd see in a Purge movie.


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,288 ✭✭✭✭branie2


    The little girl looks very happy


  • Registered Users Posts: 7,519 ✭✭✭Dr. Bre


    There is something creepy about him coming down the chimney


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,875 ✭✭✭Edgware


    Dr. Bre wrote: »
    There is something creepy about him coming down the chimney
    and emptying his sac in kids bedrooms


  • Registered Users Posts: 33,650 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato
    Restaurant at the End of the Universe


    Dr. Bre wrote: »
    There is something creepy about him coming down the chimney

    Not as creepy as appearing in a 12 year old's bedroom and telling her you're going to make her pregnant.

    Oh wait, that was god.

    It took a while but I don't mind. How does my body look in this light?



  • Registered Users Posts: 10,288 ✭✭✭✭branie2


    I think she was older than 12


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,323 ✭✭✭Homelander


    My friend was hungover one day, his parents ran a creche.... their 'proper' santa fell through on the day and he was told to get into a tacky suit hastily bought in a joke shop and pretend to be santa, he still recounts the fear to this day of sweating profusely while half-heartedly pretending to laugh, a pathetically fake beard hanging off his face, cushion stuffed down his jacket, and stink of booze wafting off this breath.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 610 ✭✭✭Cutie 3.14


    Sleepy wrote: »
    Never met him myself but an ex of mine was molested by an in-store Santas when she sat on his knee as a small child in the mid-eighties. It's made me (perhaps unfairly) very wary of them as I'm sure they're all garda vetted these days. I suppose it's a sign of how much this country has changed for the better in the last 30 years that she wouldn't have felt she couldn't tell anyone had it happened nowadays.

    Garda vetting ain't worth a sh!te in stopping somebody coping a feel of your child.


  • Registered Users Posts: 33,650 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato
    Restaurant at the End of the Universe


    Homelander wrote: »
    My friend was hungover one day, his parents ran a creche.... their 'proper' santa fell through on the day and he was told to get into a tacky suit hastily bought in a joke shop and pretend to be santa, he still recounts the fear to this day of sweating profusely while half-heartedly pretending to laugh, a pathetically fake beard hanging off his face, cushion stuffed down his jacket, and stink of booze wafting off this breath.

    Just like the real thing, so.

    It took a while but I don't mind. How does my body look in this light?



  • Registered Users Posts: 8,633 ✭✭✭SeanW


    I don't remember it, but there's a story in Longford about a former shop owner, Tom McGuiness (he was a complete lunatic, no idea how he stayed in business for so long) who (I think this was in the '80s) hired the town drunk to play "Santa" outside his shop in the town centre. He proceeded to draw attention to the shop by screaming "Merry F@#%ing Christmas" at the top of his lungs.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,813 ✭✭✭✭PopePalpatine


    Hulk Hogan in "Santa With Muscles".


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 234 ✭✭Shady Grady


    Back in my teens, we had an addict called Dontae who dressed up as Santa with a dinner bell and a Salvation Army collection cauldron he had stolen. Standing out on the green area of Lehman Village. Ringing that bell and yelling "Think of the poor kids". But we all knew he was doing it for the money to buy heroin/booze.


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 90,537 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    Should be on BBC2 or C4 this Christmas.

    https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1401143/


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,807 ✭✭✭✭anewme


    Years ago we went to a "Santa" in Quinnsworth.

    I asked for an Eska bike.

    Santa told me that he knew my Da from the Bookies.


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,288 ✭✭✭✭branie2


    anewme wrote: »
    Years ago we went to a "Santa" in Quinnsworth.

    I asked for an Eska bike.

    Santa told me that he knew my Da from the Bookies.

    Maybe Santa enjoyed a flutter now and then


  • Registered Users Posts: 24,647 ✭✭✭✭punisher5112


    Theres a guy who dresses as the Joker in the UK... Manchester maybe and he feeds his habit off of it....


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  • Registered Users Posts: 11,807 ✭✭✭✭anewme


    branie2 wrote: »
    Maybe Santa enjoyed a flutter now and then

    He did and all.

    My Ma was going to report him because there was a rotten smell of drink off "Santy".

    His beard was wafer thin cotton wool.

    It was the year that it had to be explained to us that because the real Santy could not be everywhere at once that other Santys were called in to help and the quality varies.


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