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24-03-2019, 10:07   #16
strandroad
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It is disturbingly high in Ireland and it will ensure enormous economic inequality in future years.
There is no incentive for couples to conceive responsibly in a stable relationship planned for long term. The mother knows she'll be supported by the state and in some cases children will actually help her secure housing and income. The father knows that his responsibility legally ends with child support which he is often not chased for as it's too much trouble in the light of the above. Each child comes with monthly allowance too. If you're not into stability because it's how you were brought up yourself why not to go to town.
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24-03-2019, 10:16   #17
splinter65
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any thoughts re the seemingly high numbers of one-parent families where the father is apparently absent?
My thoughts are entirely for the children abandoned unloved by their fathers and how totally crushing it must be as youre growing up and realizing that your biological father thinks that both you and your mother aren’t worth a tuppeny damn to him.
Totally unnatural.
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24-03-2019, 10:23   #18
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This is offensive to any single dad doing his best, there are also a lot of fathers who are not given the chance or access to their kids due to their mother who holds all the rights by law. It's this view that keeps men classed as the second parent.
We are not talking about “single dads doing his best”.
Couples split up, for varying reasons. Some men are good and do their level best to fight to be in their child’s life often with huge opposition from the mother and her family.
We are talking about serial shaggers who have sex with girls who become pregnant when they have no intention of having any role in the baby’s life.
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24-03-2019, 10:34   #19
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What an utterly ridiculous comment.

Many single fathers are fighting tooth and nail ti see their children and their are up against a wall as mother automatically have all the rights, that coupled with ant agro from the mothers part leads to long drawn out investigations by the likes of TUSLA etc.

Take your man hating attitude out of here,it has no place in modern society
....and many men have sex with women and have no interest in what the consequences are. They ignore maintenance orders with no consequences to them and move merrily on to the next woman without a care in the world.
I am close to a young man of 21 who has just fathered his 3rd child with 3 different mothers. He has no contact with the first two now despite him taking the mother’s to court to set up access and guardianship because he doesn’t turn up for any arranged access and wants to turn up at their homes randomly often very late at night.
He’s now split with this latest girl before his baby’s 6 week check up, apparently she’s “frying his head”. He wanted to go on the “sesh” for St Patrick’s Day. She wasn’t happy.
He’s on the dole so no maintenance.
The girls pick these guys and sleep with them, low self esteem, immaturity no reason not to. So sad.
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24-03-2019, 10:52   #20
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In fairness, the father was there when it really mattered to him, i.e. when he was achieving orgasm. The subsequent offspring was merely an incidental by-product of the act and thus of no real concern to him.
And if women showed a little more maturity in picking sexual partners with whom to have unprotected sex with then maybe more women wouldn't be left high and dry holding the child, needless to say the guy with the neck tattoo, no job who wears sports clothes as his daily attire, isn't the ideal candidate to win father of the year, a little more personal responsibility from women who let the first scum bag who smiles at them to mount up wouldn't go amiss
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24-03-2019, 11:13   #21
 
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Originally Posted by Pissartist View Post
This is offensive to any single dad doing his best, there are also a lot of fathers who are not given the chance or access to their kids due to their mother who holds all the rights by law. It's this view that keeps men classed as the second parent.
Twisting an opinion to suit your agenda - well done, cry me a river!

Unfortunately, in the real world, reality is frequently offensive and there's not really very much that you or I can do about it.
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24-03-2019, 11:20   #22
 
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You obviously aren't familiar with the family courts in Ireland. Men are brought to court to pay maintenance as standard, all the mother needs to do is file an application
Of course bringing a man to court for maintenance and actually receiving the maintenance awarded are two very different things.
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24-03-2019, 11:24   #23
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Twisting an opinion to suit your agenda - well done, cry me a river!

Unfortunately, in the real world, reality is frequently offensive and there's not really very much that you or I can do about it.
I didn't twist anything I just stated your post was offensive, and it was.
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24-03-2019, 11:36   #24
sexmag
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Of course bringing a man to court for maintenance and actually receiving the maintenance awarded are two very different things.
Well being a person who's been through the courts I've seen many people jailed for not paying maintenance and for denying access so it happens but again that doesn't suit your agenda there now does it
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24-03-2019, 16:06   #25
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I live in rural Catholic part of the country. A lot of good marriages, both working in good jobs. Irish dads always cared about their children and grandchildren, even if conservative in viewpoint.
Lazy men find lies about a mythical past to try and prevent criticism of pure laziness.
My g g grandfather played tug of war with his grandkids one of whom was my grandad in early 1900's in a rural Catholic area of our lovely country.
Irish = hardworking, committed to a future for the family and friends.
Don't listen to BS from lazy men or their mammies.
Reprove the sinner, point out to him in a one to one.
Know your own worth to him. You're worth a lot to him.
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24-03-2019, 17:23   #26
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This article seems to indicate that despite mechanisms in place, child maintenance isn't paid, child poverty in lone parent settings is high and the law is not being enforced. From 2017: https://www.thejournal.ie/readme/mai...79857-Jul2017/

among other tidbits, apparently Revenue cannot garnishee wages, so a defaulter (much more likely to be a man) can avoid payment. Likewise, if the father is on welfare, no payments are made. And, if the father ignores the court order, the mother must pursue it through what the article states is a hostile court system. And a single parent is much more likely to be living in poverty, as are the children in single-parent households.

An important point in the paper that article links to:"Ireland has no state agency with responsibility for child maintenance payments."

This means it's up to the individuals to work it out. In other countries, the State does the 'heavy lifting' of getting the money from the person not paying, through wage deduction, or even paying for it directly (the State) and getting it from the non-payer

So, I guess I think that there are laws in place to reduce this problem in Ireland, but they're being flaunted and its very difficult to get maintenance from a partner, when the partner doesn't want to pay it. They can, in fact, feck off and wait for you to chase them down through the courts.
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24-03-2019, 18:37   #27
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When you look back on the whole “abandoned mother and child” issue over I suppose 150 years or more, we’ve never ever forced men to be accountable for the seed they spill.
Every single solitary Tuam baby had a father. Every baby in Roscrea. Every woman in the Magdalene laundry had produced a baby in a joint exercise with a man. Where were the fathers of these babies? Who were the fathers and why does no one EVER to this day blame them for the fate of both their children and the children’s mothers?
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24-03-2019, 18:41   #28
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Very old fashioned. But its still common id say just less so..

In rural areas more so and some in cities

Suppose it depends on the family. My granny had to quit work when she married so was a housewife for a few years then back to work so the both of them were working.

Fairly outdated though that typical housewife and the father goes out to work.. Although now i suppose they try to call it 'stay at home mum' as if its any different than a housewife
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24-03-2019, 21:33   #29
splinter65
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Very old fashioned. But its still common id say just less so..

In rural areas more so and some in cities

Suppose it depends on the family. My granny had to quit work when she married so was a housewife for a few years then back to work so the both of them were working.

Fairly outdated though that typical housewife and the father goes out to work.. Although now i suppose they try to call it 'stay at home mum' as if its any different than a housewife
Is there something wrong with being at home minding kids and doing housework?
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25-03-2019, 07:45   #30
sexmag
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Originally Posted by Igotadose View Post
This article seems to indicate that despite mechanisms in place, child maintenance isn't paid, child poverty in lone parent settings is high and the law is not being enforced. From 2017: https://www.thejournal.ie/readme/mai...79857-Jul2017/

among other tidbits, apparently Revenue cannot garnishee wages, so a defaulter (much more likely to be a man) can avoid payment. Likewise, if the father is on welfare, no payments are made. And, if the father ignores the court order, the mother must pursue it through what the article states is a hostile court system. And a single parent is much more likely to be living in poverty, as are the children in single-parent households.

An important point in the paper that article links to:"Ireland has no state agency with responsibility for child maintenance payments."

This means it's up to the individuals to work it out. In other countries, the State does the 'heavy lifting' of getting the money from the person not paying, through wage deduction, or even paying for it directly (the State) and getting it from the non-payer

So, I guess I think that there are laws in place to reduce this problem in Ireland, but they're being flaunted and its very difficult to get maintenance from a partner, when the partner doesn't want to pay it. They can, in fact, feck off and wait for you to chase them down through the courts.
I can't agree with this, I was on social welfare a of 190 a week and was ordered to pay 60 euro a week. Madness,I appealed and it was reduced to 30. In aware of another man who was a total piece of S who has an attachment of earnings to him and his maintenance is taken directly from his wages before he even gets it.
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