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Can’t think straight on this one

2»

Comments

  • #32
    Thelonious Monk
    Registered Users Posts: 13,700 ✭✭✭✭Thelonious Monk


    IAMAMORON wrote: »
    I would give a good guilt trip for a while and maybe turn off the sex taps for a bit

    that seems like really immature toxic behaviour if you ask me


  • #33
    IAMAMORON
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,078 ✭✭✭IAMAMORON


    Thelonious Monk wrote: »
    that seems like really immature toxic behaviour if you ask me

    It probably is, but so is waiting for the mother of your baby to hit the sack before you whip out the laptop and start drooling over her pals.....

    People need to be taught a lesson sometimes.


  • #34
    Thelonious Monk
    Registered Users Posts: 13,700 ✭✭✭✭Thelonious Monk


    She just had a baby i doubt theyre tearing each others clothes off at the moment anyway


  • #35
    cj maxx
    Registered Users Posts: 13,329 ✭✭✭✭cj maxx


    He had a peek at a good looking girls social media , really nothing. Hardly a big deal .


  • #36
    Princess Calla
    Registered Users Posts: 5,769 ✭✭✭Princess Calla


    I think the issue is about context as much as anything else.

    Reverse the roles.

    Say for example you're an attractive guy, no self esteem issues, you get your fair share of "action" etc.

    Something starts to feel wrong , it turns out you need to have an operation on your bits. You've been assured everything will return to normal in time , but you still have internal doubts that you won't return to"normal" , if you do get it up ,will it last for as long as it usually would etc etc.

    To top it was off your libido hasn't returned either, you're finding yourself not too pushed about sex... seemingly this is also a "side effect" of the operation.

    Everyone tells you it will get better in time but you still have your own doubts, your self confidence is a little low, which in itself is a surprise to you as you've never had confidence issues , especially regarding sex before.

    So your out with your girlfriend, meet a friend of a friend who is the stereotypical "alpha" male. You then catch your girlfriend going through his social media ,when she thinks you've gone to bed.

    Would you be as quick to say sure she's just pleasuring herself to the dude around the corner, there's absolutely no harm in it, storm in a tea cup, nothing to see here etc.

    Or would you feel abit hurt that the person who is supposed to"have your back" and be supportive to you, is checking out other guys that live close by, when you've just had an operation on your bits and feeling pretty self conscious.


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  • #37
    Jequ0n
    Registered Users Posts: 6,034 ✭✭✭Jequ0n


    He looked at some pictures, that’s all.
    It says more about the couples’ current relationship than the actual “crime” if this is a real issue.

    Without wanting to be cynical I have to agree that comments here would be quite different if the OP was not a fairly recent mother but a regular guy/ girl.


  • #38
    Tork
    Registered Users Posts: 3,247 ✭✭✭Tork


    Jequ0n wrote: »
    He looked at some pictures, that’s all.
    It says more about the couples’ current relationship than the actual “crime” if this is a real issue.

    Without wanting to be cynical I have to agree that comments here would be quite different if the OP was not a fairly recent mother but a regular guy/ girl.

    I think the OP's current relationship is at the root of this, moreso than the girl. An awful lot happened in this relationship very quickly. By my calculations, they were only together about 6 months before she became pregnant. I hope their relationship survives and that they're happy together but it wasn't an ideal start. Everything got accelerated and maybe there are doubts on both sides.


  • #39
    IAMAMORON
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,078 ✭✭✭IAMAMORON


    Princess Calla wrote: »
    I think the issue is about context as much as anything else.

    Reverse the roles.

    Say for example you're an attractive guy, no self esteem issues, you get your fair share of "action" etc.

    Something starts to feel wrong , it turns out you need to have an operation on your bits. You've been assured everything will return to normal in time , but you still have internal doubts that you won't return to"normal" , if you do get it up ,will it last for as long as it usually would etc etc.

    To top it was off your libido hasn't returned either, you're finding yourself not too pushed about sex... seemingly this is also a "side effect" of the operation.

    Everyone tells you it will get better in time but you still have your own doubts, your self confidence is a little low, which in itself is a surprise to you as you've never had confidence issues , especially regarding sex before.

    So your out with your girlfriend, meet a friend of a friend who is the stereotypical "alpha" male. You then catch your girlfriend going through his social media ,when she thinks you've gone to bed.

    Would you be as quick to say sure she's just pleasuring herself to the dude around the corner, there's absolutely no harm in it, storm in a tea cup, nothing to see here etc.

    Or would you feel abit hurt that the person who is supposed to"have your back" and be supportive to you, is checking out other guys that live close by, when you've just had an operation on your bits and feeling pretty self conscious.

    If this happened I would dump her immediately. But it is unlikely to happen, most normal birds don't masturbate to Instagram pages, how crass.

    You will be saying blokes can get pregnant next?

    There are some things that the opposite sex just cannot do, no matter how much you think putting the shoe on the other foot is relevant, it never is. Blokes don't spend 2 hours a day thinking about doing their hair , or trying on their clothes either.... But they might just spend 2 hours a day playing with their mickey whilst looking at pornography - that is the difference.

    It is never as simple as just saying " what if a bloke did it blah blah etc " It doesn't work that way.


  • #40
    wiggle16
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 3,022 Mod ✭✭✭✭wiggle16


    Mod:
    As the OP hasn't been back and the thread has fallen into general discussion, I am locking this thread.

    IAMAMORON, it was pointed out to you earlier this evening that generalisations about gender are not welcome in PI. Please do not not engage in that again.

    Thread locked


This discussion has been closed.
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