2020 - New you or same you?

supermouse · 01-01-2020 10:15am #1

Hi humans

Happy 2020!

I've been doing a lot of thinking and reflecting on the past decade, what was a success and what could have been improved. I'm happy with how it went when I think of all that I achieved, however, I am also guilty of procrastination and taking an easier route which doesn't always lead to the achievement of bigger goals.

As I was sitting down writing my 2020 plan I stumbled upon a post from Marian Keyes (attached) which really resonated with me. As I constantly set goals, not always achieving them I wonder if this is the year for more kindness and softness with myself - accepting whatever it is that I do achieve with joy, and letting the rest go. Knowing that a missed goal doesn't take away from my validity as a human being or the quality of my character.

*BRAIN DUMP COMPLETE*

Some areas I would love to focus more on are as follows;

Kindness towards myself. I give kindness to everyone else, often leaving my own cup empty. It must start at home.
I dived into a reading challenge in 2019 and really enjoyed it, keep that up.
I've been talking about personal development courses for so long now but haven't committed - this year I commit to 2!
Finish paying off those blasted credit cards.
Do 6x 30-day challenges, if I have space in my life. Ideas include - bed by 8:30pm, daily monkey movement, journaling for 15mins every day, notice something new!

So, my fellow Boardsies, what will 2020 look like for you? Same ole same ole or are you using this new year to set some goals? If so, do you stick to them or do you feel they fizzle out and if so, why so?

Love and light,
SM Xx

Addle · 01-01-2020 10:31am

I’m not usually into reflection and resolutions, but it’s been a tough few months and I’ve a milestone birthday coming up so I can’t get away with some habits like I used to.
I just have to get better at sleeping. Early to bed, and early to rise. Maybe not 8:30 early though! I only get around 6 hours a night and I badly need to up that.
I’m skeptical of bloggers and instagrammers (it cant be healthy being so narcissistic), but I really like this list. It should be simple to follow...
https://drdoireann.wordpress.com/2019/12/30/healthy-in-2020/?fbclid=IwAR3ecRi99n17p9QcBak3cB_MFTDYmegQwvYmANj7iS-NC6o7nvQwWYY69uU

Foweva Awone · 01-01-2020 11:01am

Ah I adore Marian Keyes, she's my fave

2019 was a great year for me. I really minded my mental health, prioritising it above all else. I did two evening courses, got a Distinction in one and am well on track for a Distinction in the other. I got off Disability Allowance and back into the workforce (part-time). My son and I had lots of fun adventures, including our first trip abroad together to Legoland Germany. I experimented with a few new hobbies.

2020 my goals are:
- Take care of my mental health (probably do a DBT skills course in the summer)
- Start a Masters (I've the applications sent in, so it's out of my hands whether I get accepted now)
- Manage my finances better
- Lose two stone (need to work on both diet and exercise)

There's no 2020 new me, I'm mostly just building on the work I put in in 2019. If this year is as good as last year for me, I'll be delighted!

Foweva Awone · 01-01-2020 11:04am

By the way, daily monkey movement?? I did Google it, but coming up with nothing!

supermouse · 01-01-2020 11:34am

Foweva Awone wrote: »

By the way, daily monkey movement?? I did Google it, but coming up with nothing!

It's a type of movement that's based on the work of Ido Portal. It moves away from stereotypical exercises, towards a more innate method of moving our bodies. Think bodyweight stuff - pushing, pulling, crawling, flipping, being upside down. Super interesting but also SUPER HARD! So, as much as it's humbling it can also be frustrating haha!

meeeeh · 01-01-2020 9:28pm

Does buying a set of nice bed sheets count?

I don't do goals, resolutions or self improvement. It's hard to improve on perfection anyway. I hope for less **** year than the last one but that could be easily improved by family and friends staying alive.

supermouse · 02-01-2020 8:40am

New sheets absolutely counts!!!! I follow a girl on Instagram who said we should never take dirty 2019 sheets into 2020. Queue me changing my bed at 11:50 at night haha Thought twas very good!

I think there is a shift in recent years. Instead of big hairy goals people are starting to be kinder to themselves, remove the rubbish and focus on the good things! That I’m itself is a resolution victory I think!

meeeeh · 02-01-2020 10:37am

I think some also comes with age. I always had self improvement goals in high school and early 20s and always failed miserably. I think I eventually just gave up.

There is one that I think can work and it's about healthier lifestyle. Usually at the end of December I just look forward towards less alcohol and less rich food. Most lifestyle choices I managed to pull off did happen at the beginning of the year. It helps that days start becoming longer and the time frame you have to form a healthy habit and sticking to it is becoming longer (especially if it is outdoors) unlike at the end of the summer for example.

HildaOgdenx · 02-01-2020 11:30am

Addle wrote: »

I’m not usually into reflection and resolutions, but it’s been a tough few months and I’ve a milestone birthday coming up so I can’t get away with some habits like I used to.
I just have to get better at sleeping. Early to bed, and early to rise. Maybe not 8:30 early though! I only get around 6 hours a night and I badly need to up that.
I’m skeptical of bloggers and instagrammers (it cant be healthy being so narcissistic), but I really like this list. It should be simple to follow...
https://drdoireann.wordpress.com/2019/12/30/healthy-in-2020/?fbclid=IwAR3ecRi99n17p9QcBak3cB_MFTDYmegQwvYmANj7iS-NC6o7nvQwWYY69uU

I like that, thanks for sharing it.
It's common sense stuff but it helps to be reminded of it.
I don't do resolutions but have a fairly general aim around improving my health, for various reasons.

Segotias · 02-01-2020 3:42pm

New me please....or rather the me of a few years ago would probably do.

I thought 2017 was my worst year, cancer diagnosis just after a big birthday, but for some reason the getting through it all wasn't that daunting, 2018 the same.

2019 was different, it should have been great, a fresh start nearly, however I've found it next to impossible to get back to me. Its gotten progressively worse or more so I have, in my option of myself, my own self worth and self esteem are probably at their lowest. I'm away if it, so this year will hopefully be the year to sort it, as with most things its issues in my head but I'm taking steps to get there

bitofabind · 03-01-2020 12:07am

I hate the NY resolution shyte.

Goal setting makes me feel inadequate, I think I've spent the most of the last decade feeling like I needed to work more / be more / try more, despite being an inherent workaholic. So my plan for the 2020s is to cast aside fear and do what I want to do more. Less people pleasing, more plans that revolve around my own value system and what makes me feel good. Sounds selfish maybe, but I think it's the only path to peace and happiness.

So it's values more than goals. Kindness and compassion (to myself as well as others). Family. Friends. Fun. Meeting more people. Fitness. The great outdoors. My own place to call home.

[Deleted User] · 06-01-2020 8:38pm

I aim to keep moving forward and if that's too hard, then it's fine to paddle in place. I don't set goals, I just make plans. Sometimes they work out, sometimes life gets in the way, either way things have a way of working out in the end. The older I get, the more realistic my plans tend to be.

We should be our own best friends. If we struggle, or stumble, or fail in some way then we need to be as kind and as forgiving to ourselves about it as we would to a friend we loved and want the best for.

rainbow kirby · 06-01-2020 10:57pm

Hopefully finding who I am again after pretty much losing myself over the last few years.

Graces7 · 15-01-2020 7:43pm

Just survive day by day and do as much for all I can in my small ways . At my age, and in my dratted poor health, every day is a sheer miracle of grace and kindness . Life is precious and fragile. MIne and that of others.

krysiapearson · 23-01-2020 3:47pm

I think the concept of New Year New You is unachieavble these days. I will be happy if I can just keep a smile on my face, food in the cupboards and try to stay happy in myself.

Alot of my friends are leaving or travelling alot to find themselves. I however, don't anticipate changing but trying to make the effort to be kinder, a better friend and listen a bit more!

Sunny Dayz · 28-01-2020 1:49pm

Same me... just slightly improved.

I'm not one for big resolutions. I like my goals to be small and achievable. If I have a bigger goal, I break it down into smaller bite size pieces. Big goals can be overwhelming, if you have a set back you may often just throw in the towel. But if you break it down into smaller elements I find it's easier to manage and be a bit flexible.

I am a goals orientated person. I feel I need something however small to be working towards, otherwise I'm just floating along. My work is deadlines based.

Addle · 13-09-2020 9:13pm

Same me... haven’t stopped or changed any bad habits unfortunately!
Plenty of excuses this year.

ILoveYourVibes · 15-09-2020 5:49am

same me

come on new me sick of waiting for you!

Mortgage Question · 19-09-2020 9:42pm

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

same me

come on new me sick of waiting for you!

Cheer up !

Sunny Dayz · 23-09-2020 9:09am

Sunny Dayz wrote: »

I am a goals orientated person. I feel I need something however small to be working towards, otherwise I'm just floating along. My work is deadlines based.

God if ever there was a more accurate description! Mad I wrote that back in January and how the world has been turned upside down since. Deadlines that I would have had during the year with work and in my personal life such as trips, events, runs etc - all out the window. I don't know if I'm coming or going, what time of the year it is - as I said in my original post - I really am just floating along.

2020 - New you or same you?

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