Any News

Businessman returning from an overseas trip is met by his chauffeur.

On the way home the conversation goes like this.

"Anything happened whilst I was away James"

"Well I am sorry sir to tell you your racehorse died"

"My through-bread race horse died, what happened"

"Smoke inhalation sir"

"Smoke inhalation what do you mean"

"When the barn burnt down sir"

"My listed barn burnt down, how"

"It was a spark from the house sir"

"A spark from the house, what happened there"

"Well when the house burnt down a spark drifted over the barn and it caught alight"

"My Georgian listed house burnt down, how"

"It was when a candle fell over and caught the curtains alight"

"Candles, we don't use candles"

"Sorry sir but when you were away, your mother died, and they put her coffin in the parlour and lit some candles"

"So your telling me my mother died, they put some candles on her coffin, one fell over caught the curtains alight, my Georgian listed house burnt down, a spark caught the listed barn alight, it burnt down and my through-bread horse died of smoke inhalation, is there any good news"

"Well sir with all the heat your daffodils came up early"