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Things you want to say to husband/boyf/ex's/friends/family/people *MOD NOTE POST #1*

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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 711 ✭✭✭dammitjanet


    Dear big sis,

    With our 9 years age difference, you were always my second mom. You raised me when Mom was sick and dad was away. You taught me how to be street wise and made your friends mine. When you went travelling you called me every day and although I missed you so much, I have never looked forward to a day so much as the day you came home. You found a man who you said you wouldn't date unless he passed my test (which he did), you married him and you both made me part of your new family. Being your head bridesmaid at only 15 was the most fun I ever had, especially being snuck into the clubs for the hen night.
    I became Godmother to your first child and I love him more than anything. I try to give him the childhood you gave me.
    You are my best friend and even now take care of me so much.

    Thank you for everything, I love you always xxx


  • Posts: 0 Keith Odd Nature


    I'm glad I'm not the only one with this exact problem!

    I gave in the other day. It really weird cause I know it will end with me getting hurt again but I just can't stop myself! I'm defying my own logic.

    It seems like we always want the people that could potentially hurt us the most. When heart and hormones are involved, logic always loses. As long as you remained fractionally headstrong and realise when things are getting bad, you'll somewhat know how to get out of them.

    To stay relatively on topic;

    Dear my closest friends

    You have been with me during some of the worst days of my life. No matter what I did, said or went through, you stood beside me. Without you, without your help, without your kind words, I doubt I'll be the person I am today. So to you, from the depths of my heart and every inch of what makes me me, I thank you. I hope someday I will be able to pay you back, but I don't think anything will ever be enough or even satisfactory.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    It seems like we always want the people that could potentially hurt us the most. When heart and hormones are involved, logic always loses. As long as you remained fractionally headstrong and realise when things are getting bad, you'll somewhat know how to get out of them.

    Nope, I've gotten myself in too deep again:o I'm a lost cause.


  • Posts: 0 Keith Odd Nature


    Nope, I've gotten myself in too deep again:o I'm a lost cause.

    Nobody is ever a lost cause. There is no such thing. As long as you are living and breathing, can think for yourself then you are not. You have realised that this is not a good situation to be in, it is the first step. You have admitted it to yourself. You are far from a lost cause.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,766 ✭✭✭squeakyduck


    Sis,

    I know there is 14 years between us but sometimes I wish we hung out more, went for lunch or went shopping, I hate the way you can be so dismissive of me sometimes, especially as your best friend from college is just a month older than me. It's frustrating! I know at the moment things aren't the easiest for you with all the **** going down with you know who, but you are the better woman here and that sow is just trying to cause pain to you all all around you.

    I like the heart to hearts we have (even though they are rare) and sometimes is makes me sad that we only like 20 minutes away from each other, but neither of us have the time to properly meet up. Anyway, I love you. You're the best sister anyone could ask for, you deserve all the happiness in the world after all thats happened.

    SD

    Dear you know who ye are,

    Uncaring shower of pricks, today I thought of ye. I don't know why. After I told one of ye the background of my then worries which caused depression you went off and told everyone who would hear about my brother. I told you in confidence, and one of ye had the cheek to call him a cripple TO MY FACE. Well, if you could see him now he'd walk over to ye and throttle ye for all your worth. A boot up the hole from him is only the start of what he could do to you. Rumours and **** ye started could have destroyed him, good to know we are all made of stronger stuff.

    I'd like to see ye do what he did after his accident. Depression would devour you.

    SD


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  • Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    My Dearest E,

    I have no idea what I did to deserve someone like you, you are the most amazing, loving, special, beautiful and perfect girl on the planet in my eyes, you make me happier than i ever thought was even possible to feel. Just the thought of you gives me butterflies. I adore every single thing about you, the way you act, the way you talk, the way you laugh, the way you look, the way you smell, the way you smile, just everything. Having you as a friend would be amazing enough, but being able to call you my girlfriend and future wife, just wow.

    Saying "I Love You" doesnt even come close to doing justice as to what you mean to me, all I want from life is to spend every second of it with you. I will do everything i can to make sure you're always smiling and i promise you you will have the perfect, happy life you deserve.

    Thanks for being you. All my love, forever and ever,
    M xxx


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,728 ✭✭✭Naos


    Dear Grandad,

    I'm sorry that everytime we spoke on the phone and you asked when I was coming down, I responded with "Soon, I'm just really busy right now but soon".

    The day I walked in from work and my Dad told me you had died, I was dumbfounded. All I could mutter was a "How?" and an "Okay, I'll be back in a bit."

    I cannot even finish this.
    Brian.


  • Registered Users Posts: 430 ✭✭margarite


    darsar wrote: »
    Dear father,

    You are a fat slimey mess. You left your wife, daughter and son for one person. And she's in bits! Lol!

    I know by the way you tried to talk to me at nannys funeral this week that you are very guilty. You saw my son (your grandson) for the first time. It's kills you inside. I can tell and I am delighted for you.

    Your supposed to by my father. My guidance. But I'll give you a lesson in life - The grass isn't greener on the other side.

    I think about you everyday the last 6 years but I don't miss you. You left my mother in a complete mess. Mortgage, bills etc and still try and live life. I hate you even more writing this now.

    Slán leat
    Writing this could not have being easy, it made me so unhappy to read it, I really do hope it helped to get down on paper, and hopefully both for your son and yourself you start to put it behind you, ask yourself who is the loser I hope your answer is your father, he does not deserve to be called dad. Please try move on it will not be easy, but please try. Not all men are the same thank god, take one day at a time, forget him, enjoy your life and especially your son. I am thinking of you, it will get easier if you can learn to put it behind you, if you cannot he will have won and I for one do not want that. Best of luck:)


  • Hosted Moderators Posts: 16,186 ✭✭✭✭Maple


    Naos wrote: »
    Dear Grandad,

    I'm sorry that everytime we spoke on the phone and you asked when I was coming down, I responded with "Soon, I'm just really busy right now but soon".

    The day I walked in from work and my Dad told me you had died, I was dumbfounded. All I could mutter was a "How?" and an "Okay, I'll be back in a bit."

    I cannot even finish this.
    Brian.

    ***hugs***

    That is such a touching post, your grief is palpable. I'm so sorry for your loss.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 117 ✭✭rylie


    Dear _______

    Thanks for the kicks in my belly, the hiccups and the heartburn. I knew you were going to change my life but the reality is just amazing. I am fascinated by you, your innocence is intoxicating. I'm so honoured to care for you and help you grow. I love your chubby little hands and your cheeky grin. You make me a better person and you make life full of fun and wonder despite the doom and gloom.

    All my love darling boy
    Mammy xxx


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  • Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Dear ........

    Why did you try that? It was never going to work between us. I still haven't told my parents about her, years later. I don't like going up to see her, but I do it so she see's her Dad. I think about it every day, the day we went to the UK. I've been unhappy ever since.








    OP: Great thread.


  • Registered Users Posts: 430 ✭✭margarite


    This is the most hear felt plea for help and so beautifully put, it will be a long year, and it will only by facing each family event that you say goodbye to all of your family that was taken from you before their time that you will get through this awful time, that you will feel yourself getting stronger and more able to deal with anything that comes your way. That is the way for me, when I lost my beloved Gran dad, and shortly after my loving aunt, and even shortly after that my two nephews aged 15 and 22 through a means that I hope no one has to go through ever again. Five years on I deliberately honor their memory with the memories of the times I have spend with them, it is only in time their memory becomes easier to bear but you have to work at it. I m sorry if I not coming forward in helping you as today is the day that one of them died, and instead I m doing what my parents suggested I do and knowing them as I do I now toast today in different ways that I had done while they were alive. I do hope that the message that I am trying to say time heals - it really does through the help of your real friends and mostly your family. Thinking of you and wishing sincerely the best of luck - work through the anger and eventually you will get to where I am now - Just accepting their loss and moving on. I hope this works for you as it did for me. Thinking of you.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    Mam

    I miss you. All those times I jokingly brushed you off when you were looking for a hug, and I'd just love one from you now.

    I know things would be terribly hard for me if you were still here, but I can't help but wish for it anyway.

    I know it'd make you sad to see but we have no family anymore without you. all the things you strived for for us all, it's never going to happen. Dad isn't enough of a parent to make it happen.

    It's so weird being in your house still surrounded by all your things, but at the same time I don't know that any one could manage to do anything with them. Though dad doesn't seem to have a problem with moving on.

    You messed us all up so much and still we all miss you lots.


  • Posts: 0 Keith Odd Nature


    Mam

    I miss you. All those times I jokingly brushed you off when you were looking for a hug, and I'd just love one from you now.

    Your post opened up my eyes- this is exactly what I do. I intend to change now though.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,123 ✭✭✭stepbar


    Real life stories all on one thread..... It's pretty amazing folks and I thank you with every bone in my body for it... You stay classy folks :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 427 ✭✭verywell


    Dear Ex:
    Thanks for dragging me out of my own bed while I was sleeping in the middle of the night and kicking me out of my own home.
    Thanks for leaving me in London on my own
    Thanks for pretending to leave me in Belfast
    Thanks for saying to me that I had better watch out for myself late at night
    Thanks for making me ring the guards on you when you stole from me
    Thanks for taking my money
    Thanks for blocking my car in the drive so I could not use it
    Thanks for constantly making me feel like an ejit
    Thanks for all the hurtful comments that you said to me
    Thanks for nearly hitting me one night
    Thanks for scaring the sh*t out of me in our relationship
    And finally, thanks to me for the courage to finally get rid of you. I have finally forgiven myself for being such a fool.



    Dear Dad,
    Age is coming against us now. I really want you to see me married with children before you leave. I really want you to be able to walk me down the aisle. I love our weekly meetings but sometimes I wish that we had more to say to one another. Thank you for being a great Dad to me. I am going to be completely lost without you when ever it is your time to go. I am dreading the day that something happens to you or to mam. Please stay around long enough that I can see your smiling face when I hold out my child to you.

    I will always love you. xx


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,123 ✭✭✭stepbar


    stepbar wrote: »
    Real life stories all on one thread..... It's pretty amazing folks and I thank you with every bone in my body for it... You stay classy folks :)

    I'm afraid to write my own story... I've never been poverty stricken... I've never wanted for anything... On the same note all I wanted was a sence of place... A proper circle of friends (and i thank the ones i have).... To feel loved... No pretences no bull****e... I put on a good face... Love the craic, drink and smoke too much and manage to get away with it... I'm not an alco but I'd find it hard to give it up.... Thankfully through lifes ups and downs I've become a stronger person but I know I've a bit more to go... All I want to be is content in life... I'm not looking for fame or fortune (mind you if fortune came my way I wouldn't refuse it!). I know I'm a complex person, at times I wonder about things... I perhaps dwell on things too much... Over analyse... But at the end of the day I wouldn't want to be anyone else :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,740 ✭✭✭Asphyxia


    Dear ??????

    Thank you! Without you always interfering in my life I wouldn't get this much of a laugh, you're like a bad American sitcom :D While I wouldn't choose to pick you out of my other channels, I would still put it on in the back round when there's nothing on while I do something just to watch the hilarious things happen to you. I'm sorry your life isn't entertaining enough for you but hey it could be if you spent more time living it than trying to live in mine :D I never stopped you from being friends with me I never understood why things had to be this way.. I'm sure you have you reasons :rolleyes:

    Anyway I must be getting back to my life you know paying bills, college, work... After all what kind of person would I be if I didn't give you something to give out about with your friends :rolleyes:

    Pocketfizz :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Dear xxx,

    I have so many regrets that all i wish for is that i could turn back time and change everything. I was never honest with you when you wanted, i was shy and held myself back always avoiding the questions you asked and never discussing my feelings or been open with you. I pushed you away in the end and it is only after that i realised how much you ment to me, how much i cared but i was a fool and didn't see i was hurting you. I knew i was in love but it was too late to tell you in the end, i'm still in love with you now and it hurts every day but its what i deserve, you are an amazing person, you made me so happy through all my hard times we made each other smile and laugh. The times i spent with you were amazing and i will always remember them. The day you told me that it was over, i felt num, sick, i was speechless, the life was sucked out of me. I bottled up my feelings once again for days and spent hours drinking thinking it was just a bad dream. Even now when you text or e-mail me you make me smile, you'll always me laugh. I still think about you every day, the good times but also the bad and how i wish for a second chance, somedays i think you'll be waiting for me at home or surprise me but i know its me day dreaming and i messed up, i knew at time how special you where but i took it for granted, you say you have accepted my apologie, but i still haven't forgiven myself. I love you then and i still love you, always and forever ames. I hope he treats you better then i, i hope your happy because you deserve the best. I miss you every single day, your smile, your voice and the made you made me smile and laugh through all the good and bad times.

    Love always.....


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,376 ✭✭✭metrovelvet


    Pocketfizz wrote: »
    Dear ??????

    Thank you! Without you always interfering in my life I wouldn't get this much of a laugh, you're like a bad American sitcom :D While I wouldn't choose to pick you out of my other channels, I would still put it on in the back round when there's nothing on while I do something just to watch the hilarious things happen to you. I'm sorry your life isn't entertaining enough for you but hey it could be if you spent more time living it than trying to live in mine :D I never stopped you from being friends with me I never understood why things had to be this way.. I'm sure you have you reasons :rolleyes:

    Anyway I must be getting back to my life you know paying bills, college, work... After all what kind of person would I be if I didn't give you something to give out about with your friends :rolleyes:

    Pocketfizz :D

    One of my favourites so far. I want to put this on letterhead and distribute like a mid town flier.


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  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 12,583 Mod ✭✭✭✭blue5000


    Dear

    If you ever read this hopefully we'll get it right in the next life, I want you to know that I forgive you and I hope some day you will forgive me for the pain I caused you.

    It's a cold november morn
    I'm wishing I was never born,
    the woman I love won't talk to me,
    the one I'm with can't ever see
    just what the big problemo is.

    As the last few leaves fall
    should I give you
    just one last call.
    My love, I chose my son over you,
    there's not a day goes by that
    I wonder, did I,
    make the right choice?
    I wish just once you'd told me,
    honestly,
    what you really, really want, and
    put an end to this painful limbo.

    I'll leave it alone now,
    who knows what'll rise
    with the sap in
    springtime, when snow
    has gone, perhaps you'll
    stumble on my rhyme
    and call me.......;)

    If the seat's wet, sit on yer hat, a cool head is better than a wet ar5e.



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 682 ✭✭✭illiop


    Dear S.

    Thank you so much for being you. You are an utterly fantastic human being and I am blessed to have you as a friend. She doesn't deserve you, I wish I could tell you some of the stuff she says about you when you're not around but she's one of my best friends...and I know it would crush you. She even said she's only with you for sex, it was half in jest but I know her well enough at this stage to know when she's being sincere.
    I really owe you one after last night too.

    Love, me.

    P.s. I wish I'd meet you first.


    Dear G.

    I really wish you weren't so boring, 'cause you're beautiful.

    Love, me.


  • Registered Users Posts: 892 ✭✭✭mariebeth


    Dear R,

    I love you. I've loved you since May 2007 when we were together for just a few short weeks before I went travelling for 9 months. I pined for you the whole time travelling. When I came back we hooked up, but then you weren't man enough to face up to your own feelings for me so you messed me around.

    I loved you the whole 18 months I was going out with some other guy, even though I didn't realise it at the time. What made me finally break up with him after being unhappy for the last few months of the relationship was the realisation that if you turned up in the pub some night with another girl I'd want to claw her eyes out and if the other guy had done the same thing, it wouldn't have bothered me.

    Now we're back to square one, except you sent me a text in the middle of the night saying I was hot. I can't deal with this head wrecking anymore, all I want is for you to man up and face your feelings for me. If you can't do this then you don't deserve me.

    Love
    M x


  • Posts: 0 Keith Odd Nature


    Tell R. In all likelihood he won't man up, so you have to take definitive action and tell him straight.


  • Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Dear

    I can't believe I'm doing this. I've avoided doing this since this thread started, now, I've crumbled. I'm so sorry, I never gave us a fair chance and I don't think I've ever regretted anything as much as I do that. I didn't realise what an incredible guy you are until it was too late. Even after 3 months I still miss chatting to you, still miss those little kisses, still miss lying in your arms watching movies. I only wish I'd realised how I felt about you while I had you instead of not realising it until I'd lost you. When I think of all the times I pretty much just shoved you away when you tried to show emotion. My complete and utter fear of commitment, intimacy and my inability to show emotion was an utter downfall here.

    I know I told you jokingly that it was your fault when you brought it up a few weeks ago, I know I brushed you away, yet again, and missed my one chance to tell you that I didn't blame you. To tell you I'm sorry. I'm sorry I never gave you a proper chance. I'm sorry I never let you in. I'm sorry you never knew where you stood with me. I got scared. I never hit it off with people the way I did with you the day we met. Things moved so quickly that first week and from then I got scared and pulled off even though I wanted to be with you I just looked for your flaws and used them to stop myself from falling for you. I don't let people into my life easily and I've tried to convince myself that I shouldn't have let you in but it never sticks. I am glad I let you in, I'm just sorry I didn't have the common sense to hold on. I use that last weekend we were together to convince myself I got a lucky escape, but other things pop into my head and then I realise how much I didn't appreciate you and the things you did just for me. You are pretty much everything I should look for in a guy, the only good thing to happen to me in a long time and I just threw it away.

    The more I tried to find things to make it seem right that we split, the more I saw things I like about you. The more I saw things that didn't add up when you seemed so convinced you'd made the right decision, I just kept thinking about why you seemed so keen two weeks beforehand that we go away alone together, you seemed to be planning for a future with us then nothing. Even some of your actions since don't add up to the words where you seemed so convinced you made the right decision.

    There is a chance you'll read this and if you do you'll have a fair idea that it's aimed at you and who I am. Take my apologies, take my compliments. I do mean them and we both know I don't throw them around easily.

    I really am sorry.

    Signing off as,

    Still cofused, can't understand why.
    ********************************

    Pops,

    Bloody hell. Nearly two weeks on I still can't believe you've done it again. I've been going over and over this in my head and I STILL can't believe you've done it again. How can you make the same mistake over and over and over and over and over again? Seriously? When have you got it right? I find it so hard to resent you because I know you've always tried. I know you've always tried really hard. You've worked so hard and keep coming up with nothing, but you keep letting us down. You've never treated any of us badly, but you've broken our hearts time and time again. I'm not sure how much more any of us can take. I can only hug everyone and tell them that everything will be ok so many times. I'm running out of ideas. I'm running out of words. I don't think I can settle everyone if you f*ck up again.

    I really hope you know how lucky you are to still have us. I know you haven't done all this on purpose. I'll never abandon you, I'll look after you and give you every spare penny I have if I have to work myself into the ground. I'm not sure if we can take another shock though.


  • Posts: 0 Keith Odd Nature


    I'm hiding wrote: »
    I can only hug everyone and tell them that everything will be ok so many times. I'm running out of ideas. I'm running out of words. I don't think I can settle everyone if you f*ck up again.
    .

    Sometimes a hug and telling them things can be OK is all that is needed to make someone feel better. I'm unsure if my snippets of advice are in breach of the general rules of this thread so I'll add something else now:

    To me:
    Learn to relax a little sometimes. Most, if not all, of your anxieties exist in your head.


  • Hosted Moderators Posts: 16,186 ✭✭✭✭Maple


    I'm unsure if my snippets of advice are in breach of the general rules of this thread so I'll add something else now:
    it's ok, we'll let you know if you're out of line. :p

    it's good advice, constructive.

    don't sweat it. :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,740 ✭✭✭Asphyxia


    Dear ????

    Copy Cat much ;)


  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,653 Mod ✭✭✭✭Faith


    Dear me,

    Get a grip, you stupid woman. Cop the fúck on and stop messing yourself around. It'll never happen, so stop secretly hoping for it to. Even if it did happen, it wouldn't make you happy. Remember that. It might be nice for a day, a week, a month, but sooner or later you'd be back to square one and just as unhappy, and you'd have to go through the hurt all over again. There's no future for you here, so put your head down, cop the hell on with your studies, and make sure you get a good degree so that you can be out of here, and away from these toxic situations asap.

    Love (grudgingly),

    Me.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    Faith wrote: »
    Dear me,

    Get a grip, you stupid woman. Cop the fúck on and stop messing yourself around. It'll never happen, so stop secretly hoping for it to. Even if it did happen, it wouldn't make you happy. Remember that. It might be nice for a day, a week, a month, but sooner or later you'd be back to square one and just as unhappy, and you'd have to go through the hurt all over again. There's no future for you here, so put your head down, cop the hell on with your studies, and make sure you get a good degree so that you can be out of here, and away from these toxic situations asap.

    Love (grudgingly),

    Me.

    May I just add my own name to this letter also :o I like your way with words!


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