How to handle a situation without making a scene?

The parents are a**holes.
Definitely need to have a proper word, provided they aren’t the type that you will regret doing that to.
As for kids it’s a very touchy situation I don’t advise going near the girl in anyway as that could escalate very quickly.
Kids are fickle and it could pass, are they in the same school? Same class?

Talk to the parents of the other girl that had him against the wall, they might be a bit more proactive or have morals.

Well I would class them a**holes if they don’t care what their kids are doing.
Mine would not do that and know not to as its not tolerated.

Are the other kids in the neighbourhood in his class, they are only back to school so probably still forming bonds, if their are kids in his class from the neighbourhood I would have a word with the teacher and ask her to maybe get them at the same table for a while so they can sort of bond together, that friendship then will probably supersede the girl at home the boys might leave her by the wayside.
Boys and girls will tend to group with each other after a while I have found, noticeable with my own.

My 7 year old is a bit sensitive would be upset at stuff too. But there is a big group of boys that all hang around with other in our park all around the same age and he didn’t really want to go out with them in the summer because of it.
I don’t think it was much, just usual lad type behaviour.
But now he is back to school and a few of them are in the same class he is back out most evenings.

McCrack wrote: »

Eh calm down, they're children, these things happen. It's character building rather than a child being consistently molly coddled, important lessons in life start at an early age and one of those is an ability to stand up for oneself rather than the parent making a ruckus and going to speak with the "garda liason officer"

No , I wont calm down just because you have a different opinion to me . I am entitled to mine . If the parents dont listen and stop their child beating another I would be creating a ruckas for my child

iamwhoiam wrote: »

No , I wont calm down just because you have a different opinion to me . I am entitled to mine . If the parents dont listen and stop their child beating another I would be creating a ruckas for my child

Don't get overexcited then

And try not fight your childrens battles, not good for them long term

Look, do not shout at other people’s kids, even tho you are right, people are very defensive about their children and it won’t end well.

When the child called and ye answered you could of said well he not sure he wants to go out because you keep hitting him all the time or something and let her know.
She might stop a bit now anyway seeing as it’s out in the open and that ye have responded.

I don’t know why you defend the father in a few of your posts as you can see from his response again.

But yea don’t go screaming at other people’s children, people do not like that.

Wizard! wrote: »

Not actually defending him, or them. More like to explain, that they look like a typical couple, not some drag/alcohol addicts, or low lifers. I mean the kind of people you expect to be nice.

Never judge a book by its cover :-D

But yea you did the right thing by brining them to the door the moment you saw it, it’s what I would be doing everytime.

Awkward situation. Sympathise.

Is he getting more attention as the new kid? Could she be jealous?

We've had conversations about not being bullied or not being bullies. We can't assume our kids are always the good guys.

My kids are the same age and I've a few levels of escalation. I teach them to:

1. Always tell me but don't expect me to get involved. I'm hear if they need me but they can solve it themselves.

2. Tell the other child loudly to stop it or we can't be friends. It's surprising how much they used this and it worked. Probably because they have other friends and aren't isolated. Kids get rough, some are rougher than others. Mine are sensitive.

3. If that doesn't work escalate it. Tell the teacher or the childs parents directly themselves. Child to adult. They've done this if they find other kids are too rough, dragging them or hitting them. It happens, kids are learning boundaries, some quicker than others.

4. If it continues, it's time for me to speak directly with the other parents, but don't do it when angry or upset. It's inevitably confrontational. Calm down and find the best time to say it to them quietly.

5. If all the above fails, I'm prepared to tell my kids to meet force with force and defend themselves even if they're physically weaker. Repeated bullying happens when a child is perceived as a weak target. Bullies won't target kids who stick up for themselves. They've never had to do this.

When parents go head to head it can go all wrong. All parents think their kids are precious. Try other tactics that allow the kids to work it out if possible.

Sorry to jump in on a thread here. I fully sympathise with you op.

We are going thru something similar.

My son is 5 and started school this year. The boys in his class all get along great and play together.

After school We head to the playground along with most of his class.

Lately,there is a boy who my son was close with at the start of the school year. He is Molly coddled, however, that is nothing to do with me as it wasn't affecting my son etc.

This boy is very mannerly etc but when he doesn't get his own way he blows a fuse. I'm not saying my son is an angel either but at the end of the day they are 5. Things will seem a bigger deal to them than what they really are.

The other day, they were all together setting up teams for a game. My son said he wanted a particular boy on his team. The original boy i have been talking about said no he was on his team. This went back and forth, when all of a sudden the boy blew a fuse and screamed in my son's face really loud. My son pushed him away and the kid went back to fight. The parent jumped in all panicky shouting stop it.

My son got very upset crying and told me that this boy hurt his feelings. I calmed the situation down and all was back to normal. A few minutes later this boy called my son a name. My son told the boys mam who went to ask him. He denied it.

She came up to me and said that her son didn't call him that name. I said well look, they're only the age they are. ( I felt she was making a mountain out of a molehill). She stormed over to my son and shouted his name to say that her son didn't say anything. My son said he did call him that and he obviously didn't wanna tell the truth.

I intervened and said could we just all move on and be friends again. However the mother challenged my son again saying her son didn't say it. At this point I said that neither of us where there and didn't hear what was said so could we just leave it. She tried to question me so I just told my son we where leaving to go home as I just thought the whole thing was being blown out of proportion. She stopped talking then.

After, I had two parents asking was my son ok. They saw the whole thing.

It has been on my mind ever since. I think she completely over reacted and particularly to challenge a 5 year old the way she did. I'm of the opinion that it was a silly thing to begin with. I wasn't challenging her on her son screaming in my son's face.

I want to leave it and say no more on the situation but unfortunately this isn't the first time she can be quite arrogant to my son. My husband thinks now is the time to tell her to stop speaking like that. I just don't want the drama.