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Self Acceptance

  • 17-12-2020 11:20pm
    #1
    Lost Girl
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭


    Hey people! I'm new here. My psychologist on my session gave me an advice that I should find some support group.
    I have really problem with self acceptance. A many years I cheat myself... About it. That I'm homosexual person. I don't like myself because it.. in another hand Im tired 😔
    I'll appreciate for any message of your support.
    Edit.
    I'm a girl lost girl ... since when I remember I like women.... My reaction when I see them is stronger and different than when I see a men. But my family is Catholic and some homofobic.
    Now I'm living in Ireland... So I feel safe ... But I have big problem with Self acceptance about it. But another side.... I can't lie myself.... :-(


Comments

  • #2
    L.Jenkins
    Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 19,240 Mod ✭✭✭✭L.Jenkins


    Can you elaborate further OP? Your post seems garbled, so for that reason, I'll be keeping an eye on this thread. It will be locked at the first sight of trolling.


  • #3
    Lost Girl
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭Lost Girl


    L.Jenkins wrote: »
    Can you elaborate further OP? Your post seems garbled, so for that reason, I'll be keeping an eye on this thread. It will be locked at the first sight of trolling.

    I'm not a troll 😂 jus I didn't have a time for longer post just it.


  • #4
    Irish Praetorian
    Registered Users Posts: 1,745 ✭✭✭Irish Praetorian


    Lost Girl wrote: »
    Hey people! I'm new here. My psychologist on my session gave me an advice that I should find some support group.
    I have really problem with self acceptance. A many years I cheat myself... About it. That I'm homosexual person. I don't like myself because it.. in another hand Im tired ��
    I'll appreciate for any message of your support.
    Edit.
    I'm a girl lost girl ... since when I remember I like women.... My reaction when I see them is stronger and different than when I see a men. But my family is Catholic and some homofobic.
    Now I'm living in Ireland... So I feel safe ... But I have big problem with Self acceptance about it. But another side.... I can't lie myself.... :-(

    Hi there, and welcome. There's a lot of different people here, all with their own different stories and they will have different kinds of advice.

    My own advice would be don't panic; you aren't in any rush and no-one is going to force you to do anything or decide anything right away. You shouldn't feel as though you need to be on a schedule or be in a certain place, it's all about a journey.

    You mentioned being in Ireland now, so I'm presuming you came from somewhere else and somewhere where being Catholic was particularly important. Again, you aren't in a rush and you don't need to feel ashamed or in-conflict; more than a few people here are able to square being Catholic and being gay.

    You might find it useful to put into words what you are feeling, and if you want to share here I suspect we will have a few people able to offer some deeper advice and support. Beyond that, no panic, and again, welcome to the forum.


  • #5
    Lost Girl
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭Lost Girl


    Irish Praetorian wrote: »
    Hi there, and welcome. There's a lot of different people here, all with their own different stories and they will have different kinds of advice.

    My own advice would be don't panic; you aren't in any rush and no-one is going to force you to do anything or decide anything right away. You shouldn't feel as though you need to be on a schedule or be in a certain place, it's all about a journey.

    You mentioned being in Ireland now, so I'm presuming you came from somewhere else and somewhere where being Catholic was particularly important. Again, you aren't in a rush and you don't need to feel ashamed or in-conflict; more than a few people here are able to square being Catholic and being gay.

    You might find it useful to put into words what you are feeling, and if you want to share here I suspect we will have a few people able to offer some deeper advice and support. Beyond that, no panic, and again, welcome to the forum.

    Hi . Thank you for reply.
    U right in my fatherland religion is very important and be a "good Catholic" is most thing. Go to church every Sunday and so on... I believe in God... but I feel some torn sometimes ... I came Ireland couple years ago.And I feel IRE it's my home... I feel safe here and I'm away from my family.... I find good friends and support. But I shame of myself.I mean that I'm bisexual or lesbian. I try no rush with it. But I fight with myself who I am many year's and I some tired.
    Sometimes I'm angry of myself too what who I am.
    Thanks again for your response.


  • #6
    Annasopra
    Registered Users Posts: 40,736 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    Lost Girl wrote: »
    Hey people! I'm new here. My psychologist on my session gave me an advice that I should find some support group.
    I have really problem with self acceptance. A many years I cheat myself... About it. That I'm homosexual person. I don't like myself because it.. in another hand Im tired 😔
    I'll appreciate for any message of your support.
    Edit.
    I'm a girl lost girl ... since when I remember I like women.... My reaction when I see them is stronger and different than when I see a men. But my family is Catholic and some homofobic.
    Now I'm living in Ireland... So I feel safe ... But I have big problem with Self acceptance about it. But another side.... I can't lie myself.... :-(

    The LGBT Ireland womens group might work for you

    https://lgbt.ie/our-services/peer-support-groups/

    Maybe also running amach as well

    https://www.meetup.com/Dublin-LGBTQ-Womens-Social-Networking-Club/

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



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  • #7
    Gareth9ssss
    Registered Users Posts: 2 ✭Gareth9ssss


    Welcome.

    I'm not a woman and not gay but I am your ally. Being 'different' or in a minority or an outsider from the majority is something I can relate to.

    It's my strong belief that we have the right to be who we are so long as we don't hurt anyone. There's no shame in being honest about how we sincerely feel, whether's it's gay or anything else.

    The first issue to deal with is why you dislike yourself for feeling the way you feel about other women. In my view it's fine, you can like what you want. And it's important to like and accept yourself. But explore why you feel this dislike of yourself, also known as 'shame' - is it simply because you feel your family and some friends will be dissapointed?

    On first impression, I like you because you are honest.


  • #8
    Lost Girl
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭Lost Girl


    Gareth9ssss wrote: »
    Welcome.

    I'm not a woman and not gay but I am your ally. Being 'different' or in a minority or an outsider from the majority is something I can relate to.

    It's my strong belief that we have the right to be who we are so long as we don't hurt anyone. There's no shame in being honest about how we sincerely feel, whether's it's gay or anything else.

    The first issue to deal with is why you dislike yourself for feeling the way you feel about other women. In my view it's fine, you can like what you want. And it's important to like and accept yourself. But explore why you feel this dislike of yourself, also known as 'shame' - is it simply because you feel your family and some friends will be dissapointed?

    On first impression, I like you because you are honest.

    Hey Gareth
    Thank you for your response.
    And thank that I can get support from the person who is not a lgtb. It's very important for me. And Im appreciate for it.
    U right. I afraid that my family will be disappointment of me. I was in relationship with some men's. But it wasn't form me and still doesn't.
    Whole my life I make an another people happy but I forget about myself. I don't wanna to live in spite of myself. But I still can't live my life. Another thing ,my sister made coming out 2 years ago.... For my dad is like disaster. My mother passed away 13 year's ago ( I'm 31 now). In this situation like that I regret that I can't speak with her.
    I wish go on date with a woman one day with no shame or feels like that "I'm not enough".


  • #9
    Gael23
    Registered Users Posts: 12,086 ✭✭✭✭Gael23


    My advice os to stick with the counselling, it really really helps.

    Don’t ever forget that your parents love you unconditionally, their perception of religion will change when this comes to their door


  • #10
    Lost Girl
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭Lost Girl


    Gael23 wrote: »
    My advice os to stick with the counselling, it really really helps.

    Don’t ever forget that your parents love you unconditionally, their perception of religion will change when this comes to their door

    Thank you for ur response..
    I'm still going on session with psychologist.
    I suppose. I wanna believe that they love me like you say.


  • #11
    berocca2016
    Registered Users Posts: 242 ✭✭berocca2016


    Lost Girl wrote: »
    Hey people! I'm new here. My psychologist on my session gave me an advice that I should find some support group.
    I have really problem with self acceptance. A many years I cheat myself... About it. That I'm homosexual person. I don't like myself because it.. in another hand Im tired 😔
    I'll appreciate for any message of your support.
    Edit.
    I'm a girl lost girl ... since when I remember I like women.... My reaction when I see them is stronger and different than when I see a men. But my family is Catholic and some homofobic.
    Now I'm living in Ireland... So I feel safe ... But I have big problem with Self acceptance about it. But another side.... I can't lie myself.... :-(

    Hi Lost Girl!

    Just in relation to self acceptance, in my case all it took was time... I'm not sure if that helps or not. From starting off deeply unhappy in my late teens/early twenties to being happy now in my early 30s.

    It took me years to accept who I am, my family and friends were all very supportive (and I appreciate that I am lucky in that case) but once I processed everything through in my head it was like a weight off my mind, I hope that you continue seeking help and think its great you're being proactive and seeing a counsellor. It shows you're on the right path and I don't think I was proactive enough myself and should have sought help when I was younger.

    But I do wish you the best of luck and can reassure you that it gets better !


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  • #12
    Annasopra
    Registered Users Posts: 40,736 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    I hope the links I gave are of use

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • #13
    Lost Girl
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭Lost Girl


    Joeytheparrot wrote: »
    I hope the links I gave are of use

    Hey Joe!
    It is!
    Thank you 😊


  • #14
    Lost Girl
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭Lost Girl


    Irish Praetorian wrote: »
    Hi there, and welcome. There's a lot of different people here, all with their own different stories and they will have different kinds of advice.

    My own advice would be don't panic; you aren't in any rush and no-one is going to force you to do anything or decide anything right away. You shouldn't feel as though you need to be on a schedule or be in a certain place, it's all about a journey.

    You mentioned being in Ireland now, so I'm presuming you came from somewhere else and somewhere where being Catholic was particularly important. Again, you aren't in a rush and you don't need to feel ashamed or in-conflict; more than a few people here are able to square being Catholic and being gay.

    You might find it useful to put into words what you are feeling, and if you want to share here I suspect we will have a few people able to offer some deeper advice and support. Beyond that, no panic, and again, welcome to the forum.

    Hey! Thanks for response. It's very important to me.
    I back on consulting with my psychologist after Christmas- zoom one. So I'm on the good way to get a happiniest!
    Thanks again!


  • #15
    Lost Girl
    Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭Lost Girl


    berocca2016 wrote: »
    Hi Lost Girl!

    Just in relation to self acceptance, in my case all it took was time... I'm not sure if that helps or not. From starting off deeply unhappy in my late teens/early twenties to being happy now in my early 30s.

    It took me years to accept who I am, my family and friends were all very supportive (and I appreciate that I am lucky in that case) but once I processed everything through in my head it was like a weight off my mind, I hope that you continue seeking help and think its great you're being proactive and seeing a counsellor. It shows you're on the right path and I don't think I was proactive enough myself and should have sought help when I was younger.

    But I do wish you the best of luck and can reassure you that it gets better !

    Hey! Thank you for message!
    I need a time like u said... So I'm on good way! And I back on my consulting after the Christmas. Thanks again!


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