Irish people not listening and cutting over people in conversation

nails1 · 19-04-2020 5:05am #1

I noticed in work a lot of my Irish colleagues will cut over people mid sentence with a completely different subject like they’re not listening to what the other person is saying. Whereas my American and English will listen to what the person is saying, wait a second or two to ensure they’re finished then make a relevant response to the conversation.

Tell me how · 19-04-2020 5:14am

I'm finding it ok but hopefully it will be back to some form of normality soon.

ygolometsipe · 19-04-2020 6:03am

nails1 wrote: »

I noticed in work a lot of my Irish colleagues will cut over people mid sentence with a completely different subject like they’re not listening to what the other person is saying. Whereas my American and English will listen to what the person is saying, wait a second or two to ensure they’re finished then make a relevant response to the conversation.

Probably it's because the person is boring the socks off them. Giving them too much or inaccurate information and they aren't arsed to listen. It's like they see you taking the road to belfast when you should be going to cork, so they cut in....is it rude? Yep, is it necessary at times, yep!

Its like tommy tiernan one said
Life is very short but in the wrong company, it's too feckin long!

Duckworth_Luas · 19-04-2020 6:13am

nails1 wrote: »

I noticed in work a lot of my Irish colleagues will cut over people mid sentence with a completely different subject like they’re not listening to what the other person is saying. Whereas my American and English will listen to what the person is saying, wait a second or two to ensure they’re finished then make a relevant response to the conversation.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, but what do you think of Monaghan's chances in the championship this year.

Badly Drunk Boy · 19-04-2020 9:53am

nails1 wrote: »

I noticed in work a lot of my Irish colleagues will cut over people mid sentence with a completely different subject like they’re not listening to what the other person is saying. Whereas my American and English will listen to...

"My opinion is worth more interesting than yours. I'm more important."

I don't know if it's an Irish thing, but I've noticed it too. Maybe it's because I've a more polite/submissive nature, but I happens a lot to me. One of my best friends in work used to always do it so I eventually said it to him and he got very defensive, especially when another colleague backed me up.

It makes me think...were they even listening to what I was saying or did something just pop into their head and they felt it needed to be shared, above anything else?

Kylta · 19-04-2020 9:55am

Duckworth_Luas wrote: »

Yeah, yeah, yeah, but what do you think of Monaghan's chances in the championship this year.

Sure they have a better chance than your mans conversation

Kylta · 19-04-2020 10:02am

Badly Drunk Boy wrote: »

"My opinion is worth more interesting than yours. I'm more important."

I don't know if it's an Irish thing, but I've noticed it too. Maybe it's because I've a more polite/submissive nature, but I happens a lot to me. One of my best friends in work used to always do it so I eventually said it to him and he got very defensive, especially when another colleague backed me up.

It makes me think...were they even listening to what I was saying or did something just pop into their head and they felt it needed to be shared, above anything else?

I actually work with a chap who does that a lot, my impression of that is ( if im not participating in the conversation change it).
I know its rude cutting across someone during a conversation but unless the conversation is revelant to you, you can loose interest very quickly. One thing I will say there is nothing worse than having to listen to a pompus pretencese prick bladdering on about himself or some worthless irrelevant issue

completedit · 19-04-2020 10:52am

Honestly, it's one thing I noticed. I think Irish people revel in being a bit overly cynical and sort of think being too earnest is a bad thing. Irish people in general don't like looking like mugs(insecurity thing?) so take on a sort of disregard for other people until it's someone they feel an onus to genuflect before. But I much prefer the American, Spanish way where they really seem to be invested in what you have to say(based off my life experience). I know with my mates, too many times, people are too quick to want to turn the story into some banter or make some 'gas' quip, whereas they should just take what the person is saying on face value.

Huge exaggerations here and it's probably anecdotal but just a general trend I noticed. Could be my friends are *****

RobertKK · 19-04-2020 11:27am

I have found myself doing this a few times, there is something I want to say and I want to say it before I forget to say it.
I then would only interrupt if the person has been speaking a long time, say what I wanted to say, apologise for interrupting and explain it’s because I would otherwise forget and I realise it’s rude, and then after saying what I wanted to say I bring it back to what the person was talking about and if they weren’t finished, I would tell them to continue.
I know it’s not great manners but I can then concentrate better on what they are saying rather than thinking about what I want to say and trying not to forget it as I listen...

tdf7187 · 19-04-2020 11:33am

It has become a common Irish trait. In my view it speaks to a deepseated insecurity. People with plenty of material wealth but no inner core, no spiritual values.

tayto lover · 19-04-2020 11:36am

Duckworth_Luas wrote: »

Yeah, yeah, yeah, but what do you think of Monaghan's chances in the championship this year.

They have no chance really. Now what were we talking about?

Muppet Man · 19-04-2020 11:42am

There’s also the opposite - not listening at all. Especially true on video conferencing.

Reminds me of this scene from Wayne’s world

https://youtu.be/8aXqgoiVb8E

Rothko · 19-04-2020 12:36pm

Yeah, I'm sure only Irish people do this

Mic 1972 · 19-04-2020 12:44pm

It's rude, whether it's done by Irish or by others

Bobblehats · 19-04-2020 12:54pm

tdf7187 wrote: »

It has become a common Irish trait. In my view it speaks to a deepseated insecurity. People with plenty of material wealth but no inner core, no spiritual values.

Jonybgud · 19-04-2020 12:55pm

nails1 wrote: »

I noticed in work a lot of my Irish colleagues will cut over people mid sentence with a completely different subject like they’re not listening to what the other ........

So, you're so feckin boring people start other conversations while you are still yammering on, isn't it time you took the hint, boring boy........:D

Bobblehats · 19-04-2020 12:57pm

My aunt does it. Yap yap yap you try and interject “see you don’t listen!”

saabsaab · 19-04-2020 1:03pm

Bobblehats wrote: »

North Clare?

Bobblehats · 19-04-2020 1:08pm

saabsaab wrote: »

North Clare?

nthclare

saabsaab · 19-04-2020 1:15pm

In the work situation I would say it tends to be done by a pushy middle manager type to a junior colleague but never to senior staff.

Mic 1972 · 19-04-2020 1:43pm

saabsaab wrote: »

In the work situation I would say it tends to be done by a pushy middle manager type to a junior colleague but never to senior staff.

eheheh true

AllForIt · 19-04-2020 1:47pm

Certain kinds of ppl are very touchy about these kinds of things like college lecturers and business people for example. Wouldn't be my type of ppl either in general.

cj maxx · 19-04-2020 2:09pm

I fcucking detest that trait in people. The height of ignorance.
Some bullies use it as a way to demean you, to show of their self importance.
If someone does it to me now I just walk away

Chris_Heilong · 19-04-2020 2:14pm

Most things people say have no real meaning or impact on the world, with friends it is best to get a laugh for a few minutes as peoples attention spans are very short and if what you are saying is relevant I am sure it would have been listened to....either that or your friends/workmates do not respect you which is a different matter.

19-04-2020 5:28pm

When I was in my 20s a friend said this is what the Spanish students did in conversation on Dublin Bus.
The same reason why they sounded so loud.

And now 25 years later the Irish are indistinguishable from their Spanish counterparts. In all generations.

Not just on Dublin Bus but more so on the Go Ahead 76 and 75.

It's more Cacaphony than any conversation even Smalltalk

freshpopcorn · 19-04-2020 5:39pm

My father does this he basically does this because he's bad to pay attention to other people and sometimes simply can't keep up and he buts in with something completely unrelated.
Sometimes we've had people over and they were really saying something good and he buts in about lots of people having the flu, a factory closed 15 years ago, ago, etc. It's always the same topics he buts in with.

19-04-2020 6:06pm

freshpopcorn wrote: »

. It's always the same topics he buts in with.

yes, i know 2 or 3 of these types.

Kylta · 19-04-2020 6:19pm

Maybe we irish need something to stimulate our brains, and less said in fewer words is better and loads of words that sound boring. Just a though.
Maybe the tread should be why do the Irish bore so easily!

Hangdogroad · 19-04-2020 7:38pm

freshpopcorn wrote: »

My father does this he basically does this because he's bad to pay attention to other people and sometimes simply can't keep up and he buts in with something completely unrelated.
Sometimes we've had people over and they were really saying something good and he buts in about lots of people having the flu, a factory closed 15 years ago, ago, etc. It's always the same topics he buts in with.

My mother's like that. Interjects about funerals, weddings etc.

JustAThought · 19-04-2020 7:47pm

Hangdogroad wrote: »

My mother's like that. Interjects about funerals, weddings etc.

common Irish defense tactic for intercepting bores and shortcutting the misery - take note.

freshpopcorn · 19-04-2020 7:52pm

Hangdogroad wrote: »

My mother's like that. Interjects about funerals, weddings etc.

We could have a famous Irish murderer(Who never confessed) in the living room and he'd be almost confessing and my father would but in. ''Did the Aul cold ever go around when you were in there?''

Irish people not listening and cutting over people in conversation

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