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06-04-2019, 13:49   #1
JohnnyFlash
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What's the etiquette here??

I had to open my business today for a few hours, and asked one of the lads to come in and give me a hand. I was out last night watching the Liverpool game, and I've a stage 6 hangover as a result.



Anways, it got to about half 10 and I felt my 'sheriff's badge' starting to twitch. Headed into the jacks and dropped a serious anchor into Brown Water Bay. I was sitting there afterwards on my phone when what do I hear but the jacks door opening, and someone heading into the stall beside mine. Down go the trousers, a slight groan, a string of watery farts, and then a noise that sounded like a box of old boots being thrown out of an attic. A smaller fart to finish up, and a deep exhalation of breath.



I was shocked, and very angry. Am I overreacting, or should the fúcker have waited until I had finished using the boombox before he decided to go and pinch one out? He's an Eastern European, so don't know if they have different cultural norms. I didn't say a word to him for the rest of the morning, and am in a shocker of a mood since.
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06-04-2019, 13:54   #3
jessiblah
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Your description of everything makes it a bit hard to follow but what I'm getting is... you're annoyed your employee used the bathroom at the same time as you? And you didn't speak to him for the rest of the morning because of it?

Surely you're trolling right now?
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06-04-2019, 13:55   #4
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Thanks for the laugh, OP. Needed it today.

So someone obviously had the sh1ts and you think they.....should have held it in or sh1t themselves because you were in the toilets first

....?
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06-04-2019, 13:57   #5
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Shocking that fellow humans could relieve themselves. Even if they didn't have three aliases. Shocking.
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06-04-2019, 13:58   #6
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyFlash View Post
He's an Eastern European, so don't know if they have different cultural norms. I didn't say a word to him for the rest of the morning, and am in a shocker of a mood since.
Where are you from yourself? Where I'm from (Ireland), giving a vivid description of a person's bowel movement would not be considered culturally normal.
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06-04-2019, 13:59   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lainey_d_123 View Post
Thanks for the laugh, OP. Needed it today.

So someone obviously had the sh1ts and you think they.....should have held it in or sh1t themselves because you were in the toilets first

....?
Obviously I don’t want them to shîte themselves. However waiting a minute or two for me to finish up is surely less awkward than popping into the cubicle beside me and unloading a few pints of toxic arse gravy. I heard everything and I find the whole encounter awkward is all. It crossed my mind to fire him to be honest.
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06-04-2019, 14:01   #8
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Was he on the piss the night before as well? As in could he have been on a bad way himself and might’ve been desperate? If not, I think it’s poor form, particularly if you know the person. Some people just don’t give a f*ck though.
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06-04-2019, 14:08   #9
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Don't care
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06-04-2019, 14:09   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyFlash View Post
heard everything and I find the whole encounter awkward is all. It crossed my mind to fire him to be honest.
Fire him for taking a sh*t? Have you left out some details, like he reached into the bowl pulled his log out and used it like a jumbo crayon to write on the jacks wall something along the lines of ‘my boss JohnnyFlash is a c*nt’? Because if not, pull your head out of your own recently excavated hole.
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06-04-2019, 14:12   #11
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Tell him to keep it watery, you do not want to be paying him to spend ten minutes on the toilet.
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06-04-2019, 14:14   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TomasMacR View Post
Fire him for taking a sh*t? Have you left out some details, like he reached into the bowl pulled his log out and used it like a jumbo crayon to write on the jacks wall something along the lines of ‘my boss JohnnyFlash is a c*nt’? Because if not, pull your head out of your own recently excavated hole.
I’m not going to fire him - it just crossed my mind for a second. He’s a good worker and doesn’t drink as much as the other Eastern European’s I employ. I just think what he did was vile and unnecessary, and I can’t forget what I heard and smelled. He should have waited if he could at all. Might have a chat with him on Monday about it.
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06-04-2019, 14:18   #13
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The toilet etiquette of some people is appalling. I’ve some shower of animals in my place.

One lad will actually wait outside the stalls for one to free up. He’s right there as soon as you open the door. Why he won’t just use the handicapped toilet like a normal person is beyond me.

I guess you’d have to take into account the nature of his evacuation. Maybe he waited as long as he could. I was once in a similar boat after getting through too many bowls of All-Bran before my first day in a new job. I stuck it out though until I could get some time to myself. Wasn’t easy, lots of cramping and loud gurgling.

If it’s case that it was an emergency, you’d have to give him a pass, if not then an informal verbal warning might be required.
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06-04-2019, 14:20   #14
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyFlash View Post
Obviously I don’t want them to shîte themselves. However waiting a minute or two for me to finish up is surely less awkward than popping into the cubicle beside me and unloading a few pints of toxic arse gravy. I heard everything and I find the whole encounter awkward is all. It crossed my mind to fire him to be honest.

First of all, how was he supposed to know how long you would be? Second, if you're just sitting there on the phone then you were finished. Have some decency and feck off out of the jacks when you are finished and don't use it as a library.
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06-04-2019, 14:21   #15
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I suspect he wants to rub arses with you.
Them foreign lads are strange.
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