Originally Posted by Church on Tuesday
That's completely normal though and in many cases, essential. You need to clear the air from time to time. Every relationship is different but I'd be worried if there were no disagreements from time to time; I don't want a Stepford Wife.
One thing I will say is one should never go to bed angry with your partner, there is no need for the argument to last days on end. I strongly dislike drama so prefer honest communication (and active listening) on whatever matter is causing conflict.
See, to me it should never get to that point, because if it does, something went wrong a while ago and wasn't addressed. Everyone knows, and advises that communication is key, but still very few practice it. I've personally found the best way is to make a smart arse comment about something that is irking you, or something that happened, and a natural discussion can happen from it. Instead, people let it fester and build up and then lash out. That's not healthy to me.
One of the few actual (non-physical) fights I've had was drink fuelled and I spent the next week apologising and making up for it, because it was a non-issue that I let fester, only over the space of a few hours, because of the drink, instead of my usual approach. I just think it's a waste of energy and time, and will change a persons feelings over time too.
It's the simplest of things, but mention something as soon as it irks, and clear the air there and then. They're not disagreements unless it devolves into one, but that's up to both sides to not let it, and should never go beyond that. If it does, to me, there are bigger issues and if it persists it's not worth the hassle.
I agree with your second point!