Neighbour issues

123lookatme · 24-06-2015 4:23pm #1

Hi all,

Im new to the boards but I wanted to get your opinion on an issue I am having with a neighbour. I moved to Laois 8 years ago. We live in a quiet neighbourhood and the area is nice. A lot of us moved in at the same time which helps.

A couple moved in next door. Initially I tried talking to both. The wife came across as ignorant. Like getting blood from a stone but the husband was talkative. Until I realised how much of a moaner he was. And sarcastic, often making jokes at my expense in front of fellow neighbours. He always had this smirk on his face when you talked to him, almost as if he was mentally slagging you off as you were talking.

After nearly 5 years I had enough. So I stopped talking and making the effort. After a couple of efforts to talk to me came to nothing he got the hint. Now after nearly 3 years we still havent spoken. Plus him and his wife really made the effort with their other neighbours beside them. They made little effort with us.

I cant stand the guy and realised that after 3 years Ive still nothing to say to him.

Im wondering did I do the right thing. He has little respect for me or my wife and thats the biggest issue.

Cheers

Keehar · 24-06-2015 7:29pm

Sounds to me like you did the right thing. Why bother making the effort with someone who doesn't make it in return, and who doesn't treat you respectfully either. I wouldn't waste my time talking to someone like that.

DivingDuck · 24-06-2015 7:35pm

It just sounds like an unfortunate clash of personalities, and I don't think you did anything wrong. Unfortunately, all neighbours aren't going to be good mates, and considering some of the issues I've read with neighbours here on Boards, ranging from noise to drug use to pop-up brothels, I think you got off lightly...!

So long as relations are cordial enough that you don't have to worry about your paper being stolen or dog mess being flung into your yard, just accept the frostiness and move on with your life. Maybe you'll get lucky when they eventually move on and someone more on your wavelength will move in. Until then, you're probably better to let sleeping dogs lie. Forcing the issue might lead to things becoming worse and outright animosity developing between you, which nobody needs in their lives.

123lookatme · 25-06-2015 9:55am

Cheers guys. Yeah its just weird. What annoys me the most is he walks around trying to be everyones friend but to me coming across as false. Trying to be mr nice guy and I know hes anything but. Never tried once to find out what was wrong? I realised I was never a mate.

He also holds occasional barbeques and invites his other immediate neighbours in and neighbours across the road in. Trying to be a big man on campus.

I really shouldnt let him get to me but I appreciate everyones response. It could be much worse but I hate saps like him.

laois gael · 26-06-2015 4:36pm

Pm me I'd like to know where you are staying so I can say hello instead!!!!:)

freshpopcorn · 26-06-2015 4:41pm

People don't always get on. I've friends that i get on well with but I know that mixing these friends could result in a clash of personalities. You can't always get on with everyone and just because you don't get on with someone doesn't mean there not nice/good people. There just people you don't connect with.

123lookatme · 27-06-2015 1:08pm

I tried connecting but himself and herself never really made the effort. Although their neighbours on the other side were treated like royalty. They occasionally throw parties and invite them in. We dont get invited. He swans around like mr nice guy to everyone but I know the kind he is. Really cant stand him, I did give him enough of a chance but after nearly 5 years and one too many sarcastic comments general moaning I had enough. Going on 3 years now.

Hes no loss to me it can just get awkward if we are out at the same time. Im sure other neighbours have noticed as the tension is rife.

He never came to me and asked what was wrong? Because he doesnt care, hes not a mate. They recently had a second child and we dont even know if its a boy or a girl? Imagine not knowing that abouit your next door neighbour?

Id say he was sickened we didnt try finding out as all the other neighbours got invited in to see the newborn.

Good luck to them but he doesnt respect me or my wife so why should I respect him?

A******e.

road_high · 29-06-2015 5:40pm

Why even let this affect you? Best remedy for these people and yoursekg especially is to just ignore them and continue living your own life!

Angron · 03-07-2015 3:25pm

Realistically, this isn't a Laois issue. I'm not really sure there's any area of boards this could apply to, bar perhaps Personal Issues (though I can't say it'd be a definite fit there). I'm going to lock this one.

Neighbour issues

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