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A Christmas Party when you don't drink, how do you manage?

  • 06-11-2019 7:00am
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 238 ✭✭Sussex18


    Hi it's on in a few weeks, well 13th December to be precise. Coffee can be hard to procure at night and a lot of minerals are very high in sugar, very acidic too. I have a bit of acid reflux so it's not just a matter of alcohol. I do kinda like the 0.5 Erdinger/Paulaner but this pub doesn't do it.

    I normally just don't go to pubs, I stick to cafe's. But Christmas is but once a year and I'd like to be with 'my tribe' on this occasion.

    Can be a long night though if you don't drink. An hour or 2 is fine.

    Thoughts appreciated 🙂
    Thanks
    S


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,208 ✭✭✭LuasSimon


    Planning to go to xmas party and not drink also mainly because I don’t drink much in recent times , getting older and find it harder to recover and waste the following day .
    But I can hear it already , why aren’t you drinking , dry balls etc etc . It suits me to drive home and avoid the cost of a taxi anyways . My preference would be a still water but I might try Heineken zero to not be as obvious a non drinker on the night . Sad but Ireland still has this peer culture at all ages to drink .


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,567 ✭✭✭Squatman


    Ye sound like great craic...

    Try heineken zero, or virgin mohito/ cocktails r if your too self conscious, maybe stay in and avoid the party?


  • Registered Users Posts: 24,694 ✭✭✭✭Strumms


    It’s an acquired skill, Heineken zero isn’t bad, normally I have a couple of cokes then a couple of these...

    The last hour can always get a bit crap depending on the company. When pissed some people can still be interesting and sound, others can be pure boring, difficult and even a bit messy. I tend to arrive early enough so I don’t need to be there at the end reminiscing about something that may or may not have happened but which I have little interest or recollection of either way... in early out early...


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,132 ✭✭✭Sigma Force


    I’ve never had a drink problem, I don’t like the taste but I have no problem drinking plain water at a do or a pub etc you’d always get the smart comments but if your serious they back off. People knew just not to bug me with stupid questions I don’t care what they think. Many of course loved their drink a bit too much. My bf is two years in recovery and a couple of times people have gone in and on eventually he just says he gave it up and that shuts them up (they knew full well how much beer he could put away) you can just see their faces drop half in shock and half disappointment because it can make them think jaykers if that lads not drinking the shares in carlsberg are going way down it also makes them look at themselves which they hate. Sod what people think too much emphasis is put on how others will react, was never one to give in to any kind of peer pressure and there’s more than ever now. It’s like people aren’t allowed habe a mind of their own.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,172 ✭✭✭BKWDR


    Sussex18 wrote: »
    Hi it's on in a few weeks, well 13th December to be precise. Coffee can be hard to procure at night and a lot of minerals are very high in sugar, very acidic too. I have a bit of acid reflux so it's not just a matter of alcohol. I do kinda like the 0.5 Erdinger/Paulaner but this pub doesn't do it.

    I normally just don't go to pubs, I stick to cafe's. But Christmas is but once a year and I'd like to be with 'my tribe' on this occasion.

    Can be a long night though if you don't drink. An hour or 2 is fine.

    Thoughts appreciated 🙂
    Thanks
    S

    OP the best thing you do is to have a plan whatever you decide.
    I always find driving to the pub / restaurant will help your resolve at staying off the drink and part of the plan is to decide when to leave,midnight is my time to leg it, usually it gets silly around then and people are at their most obnoxious about non drinkers.

    As regards what to actually drink, drink what you actually want to. A pint of water, dilute. Tea / coffee (ask at least)
    But if you are asking what will attract least attention, just get a soda water and lime or a sparking water in a slim Jim glass.
    Best of luck


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  • Registered Users Posts: 14,930 ✭✭✭✭Fr Tod Umptious


    Sussex18 wrote: »
    Hi it's on in a few weeks, well 13th December to be precise. Coffee can be hard to procure at night and a lot of minerals are very high in sugar, very acidic too. I have a bit of acid reflux so it's not just a matter of alcohol. I do kinda like the 0.5 Erdinger/Paulaner but this pub doesn't do it.

    I normally just don't go to pubs, I stick to cafe's. But Christmas is but once a year and I'd like to be with 'my tribe' on this occasion.

    Can be a long night though if you don't drink. An hour or 2 is fine.

    Thoughts appreciated 🙂
    Thanks
    S

    Hi OP
    These days I rarely drink at work events, and have not drank at a good few Christmas parties over the last few years.

    Main reason is that it's more convenient for me to drive to these events and because I much prefer to be be fresh the next day whether it is a work day or not.

    I usually have a non alcoholic beer or sparkling water or something.

    If any one questions why I'm not drinking I tell them the truth, I'm either driving or don't want the hangover or both.

    I usually hang around for an hour or more after the food is finished, or maybe till after midnight, and then just head off, before it gets really messy as another poster said.

    I've never not enjoyed a Christmas party where I was not drinking and certainly enjoyed the next day and having a clear head.




  • If you're asking this question, perhaps it would be much better not to go? Meet the people in another environment if you enjoy their company. Somebody else above had a concern about what people may or may not think. I wouldn't give a split second of a thought to what people may or may not think about what I choose to drink. That superficiality is plainly a really dense approach to this - far beyond run-of-the-mill insecurity.

    As for what to drink, the "alcohol-free" drinks and all the other alcohol taste gimmicks are more of the same alcohol industry codology to keep people in the alcohol zone. To keep the idea of drinking alcohol alive in the back of your mind, that idea which means so many people who ostensibly "give up the drink" fail because that "fallback position" of drinking again was always in the back of their minds. That thing, that little voice in the back of their mind. They've mentally set themselves up for failure from the start. Only fooling themselves - and most of us who finally give up alcohol go through our own enormous share of this self-delusion so we know how the thought process is.

    If somebody is serious about giving up alcohol for once and for all, they need to remove all alcohol from their lives, be it at home or via non-attendance at social events in pubs or the like. Just don't attend. You won't be missed, so don't delude yourself there. It doesn't really matter even if you were; your priority is to get strong again, and nothing else should matter unless you're looking for an excuse to drink (which is usually the reality).

    Once you remove alcohol from your life, you start to break those utterly obtuse cultural associations of alcohol with, of all things, "relaxation", "unwinding" and other positive emotions. They are fúcking lies. Unequivocally so. Once out of that alcohol-centric/glorification environment you begin to see clearer, everything from the lies you told yourself about what constitutes "relaxing" to the unpleasantness of drunk people to the infinitely better options for enjoying life, to appreciating life, without alcohol.

    It's actually quite unbelievable that anybody thinks they can successfully change their behaviour without changing their environment first and foremost. Whether that's leaving alcohol in their home under whatever spurious, delusional excuse or attending alcohol-laden events. There's a heap of utter delusion that so many people ostensibly "giving up the drink" cod themselves with.
    Giving up drink is so, so much easier once you commit yourself to never, ever drink again. That's the line, never to be crossed again. That certainty reduces anxiety, naturally creates healthy options for spending your time where drink isn't even considered and gets you out of that vicious cycle of alcohol=relaxation a hell of a lot quicker. It also saves you a fortune in negating the need for rehab or the like - things which are often (i.e. not always) just excuses people use to opt out of facing up to their problem. More delusion, in other words. These years don't come back.

    Alcohol doesn't threaten me anymore. I would have no difficulty spending hours in a pub now; well, not quite true - the noise of tv or music or rowdy drunks who think they're funny would ensure I try to leave as soon as possible. There are countless places more conducive to good conversation than loud pubs on busy nights. But now that I've enjoyed almost 6 years of a life without alcohol the abject stupidity of returning to an alcohol-centred world has zero appeal to me. I can't believe that for so long I let myself be so dull and so unaware of how short our healthy years are. Wasted years, and the most stupid hole I ever fell into with loads of stupid associations keeping my mind conquered. These associations are far too pervasive in our society, still, and we all need to create a deep cultural space, a breathing space, between ourselves and that culture in order to free ourselves from it.

    In short, if you're asking this question just avoid the party/pub/event. Look after yourself by removing yourself from the cycle of alcohol-based stupidthink.


  • Registered Users Posts: 238 ✭✭Sussex18


    I ended up not going. I didn't miss being there, I would likely have been bored quite a bit. But I did miss not being with friends, because I rarely meet up with this group in a social situation.

    I stress that I wasn't a problem drinker. But it wasn't good for my waistline or my stomach and as I reduced drinking I just became bored in pubs, well for more than an hour anyway.

    The problem is that too many social events take place in pubs. They are easier to organise. A meal takes a little more organisation, is more expensive with potentially a high drop out rate. I like eating or even coffee out. But not pubs.


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