Acting differently around your partner...

Porklife · 11-01-2019 3:50pm

Brycen Black Refrigeration wrote: »

Ain't that the truth.

Who cares?! It's an anonymous forum and is just a bit of fun.. for me at least. Can't believe how bent outta shape some people on here get over things!

freshpopcorn · 11-01-2019 3:52pm

I learned this around the time of the Belfast rape trial. I saw woman say there son/boyfriend/brother/etc would never use language like that because they were raised correctly . They clearly don't know what there like behind there backs!

Porklife · 11-01-2019 3:54pm

freshpopcorn wrote: »

I learned this around the time of the Belfast rape trial. I saw woman say there son/boyfriend/brother/etc would never use language like that because they were raised correctly . They clearly don't know what there like behind there backs!

Exactly. I see it with my own friends. They would never speak the way they do in the pub in front of their girlfriends. Ever.

Deebles McBeebles · 11-01-2019 3:55pm

Porklife wrote: »

Heady thread :pac:

I thought that thread was about the other end.

Bigbagofcans · 11-01-2019 3:56pm

freshpopcorn wrote: »

I learned this around the time of the Belfast rape trial. I saw woman say there son/boyfriend/brother/etc would never use language like that because they were raised correctly . They clearly don't know what there like behind there backs!

Very true. I've seen glimpses of lads' WhatsApp group messages and they're full of filth!

Porklife · 11-01-2019 3:58pm

Deebles McBeebles wrote: »

I thought that thread was about the other end.

It was but foreplay..:pac:

evil_seed · 11-01-2019 4:01pm

I am what I am, and that's all that I am, and I am it

SomeSayKos · 11-01-2019 4:02pm

Porklife wrote: »

I just noticed last night how casually I was throwing the word c*nt around and how brass I was being and I realised I'd never act that way if he was there=.

Just out of interest, what's wrong with saying the word 'c*nt' around yer fella?
You couldn't swing a cat without hitting a c*nt in my conversations with my partner.

I act the 'same' around my partner as my friends as I love these people and feel comfortable around all of them. I don't compartmentalise them and act different. I only do that in work coz I don't want to lose my job

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5 · 11-01-2019 4:04pm

I'm always so confused by this idea that lads have the monopoly on "locker room talk". I can't remember the last time I DIDN'T end up talking about cock this, ride that, tampon the other at a girls' night in. I know more than I really want to about a couple of friends' partners' balls.

Tell me how · 11-01-2019 4:07pm

SomeSayKos wrote: »

Just out of interest, what's wrong with saying the word 'c*nt' around yer fella?
You couldn't swing a cat without hitting a c*nt in my conversations with my partner.

I act the 'same' around my partner as my friends as I love these people and feel comfortable around all of them. I don't compartmentalise them and act different. I only do that in work coz I don't want to lose my job

Personally, I view the c word as a particularly forceful swearword, I'm no prude but I find I can communicate fine without have to use it in normal conversation.

I don't necessarily think there is anything wrong with trying to speak without using swear words for the most part. Does it not show respect for your friends/family/partner?

As others have said, you wouldn't use it in a formal environment, do those close to you not deserve a similar level of respect.

loveall · 11-01-2019 4:07pm

Porklife I reckon the laddish side keeps the blokes as your mates and hopefully stops them getting their wires crossed and falling in love with you. The demure side is probably your real relationship side maybe the only time you can let someone look after you just a little. Lets face it if you kept your laddish side up in the relationship it wouldn't be you on the receiving end of what I've read...you'd be ramming it home!
Time will change things.
I don't think other women like it though and maybe some don't realise that you'd rather have the company of men than women.

Gimme A Pound · 11-01-2019 4:07pm

My friends and I wouldn't dream of talking about lads like that.

I know some women do but I don't know that it's equal between the sexes.

I don't get it tbh - smacks of bravado. It's private too.

Yeah I'd say vulgar stuff in general to male or female friends but not about specific guys' genitals - why on earth would you do that?

Ariadne · 11-01-2019 4:07pm

Kenia Chubby Thunderstorm wrote: »

I'm always so confused by this idea that lads have the monopoly on "locker room talk". I can't remember the last time I DIDN'T end up talking about cock this, ride that, tampon the other at a girls' night in. I know more than I really want to about a couple of friends' partners' balls.

This confuses me too. I have very dirty conversations with my friends, not only men have vulgar chats. I also have vulgar chats with my male friends, god forbid!

freshpopcorn · 11-01-2019 4:08pm

Kenia Chubby Thunderstorm wrote: »

I'm always so confused by this idea that lads have the monopoly on "locker room talk". I can't remember the last time I DIDN'T end up talking about cock this, ride that, tampon the other at a girls' night in. I know more than I really want to about a couple of friends' partners' balls.

I was always thought woman used language similar to this maybe not as much as men but it was used.
My college course had mainly women in it and the amount of women they called sl*its would shock some people.

Ariadne · 11-01-2019 4:10pm

And my missus would tell me to go and fcuk myself if I told her I didn't like it when she uses the word "cnut"

Gimme A Pound · 11-01-2019 4:12pm

freshpopcorn wrote: »

I was always thought woman used language similar to this maybe not as much as men but it was used.
My college course had mainly women in it and the amount of women they called sl*its would shock some people.

They called them what? Just write it out.

Porklife · 11-01-2019 4:18pm

SomeSayKos wrote: »

Just out of interest, what's wrong with saying the word 'c*nt' around yer fella?
You couldn't swing a cat without hitting a c*nt in my conversations with my partner.

I act the 'same' around my partner as my friends as I love these people and feel comfortable around all of them. I don't compartmentalise them and act different. I only do that in work coz I don't want to lose my job

Haha.. I do say **** around him and he says it alot himself, I just don't say it as frequently. I also don't speak with as much vulgarity as I would around my friends.

retro:electro · 11-01-2019 4:18pm

I’m most myself when I’m around my bf. I feel totally relaxed and know I can say pretty much anything I like, and he’s the same. In fact we’ve pretty much morphed into the same person. Same humour, same habits, often say the same sentence at the same time- hard to know who is who exactly! But, I still wouldn’t say I’m 100% myself around him, and that’s because I adore time by myself and being alone. In fact I need it.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5 · 11-01-2019 4:21pm

Brycen Black Refrigeration wrote: »

I don't get it tbh - smacks of bravado. It's private too.

Yeah I'd say vulgar stuff in general to male or female friends but not about specific guys' genitals - why on earth would you do that?

Those two friends (and the men in question, thank god) are a bit oversharey in general, it comes up in talking about sex. It's not bravado, more bonding, reassurance, advice etc.

That's at the extreme end but I wouldn't think anything of sitting round the table with the gals and everyone telling a series of increasingly more complex and vulgar jokes.

I just don't get the thing of "Oh ye innocent women have nooo idea what all the lads ever talk about when ye're not there".

Porklife · 11-01-2019 4:23pm

As an aside, my bf thinks I'm gorgeous (his words!) but sometimes I'll look in the mirror and laugh thinking maaannnn if he could see me now he'd change his tune!
He sees me in all States btw but on a hungover Saturday morning when I've woken up with mascara all over my face and a chicken ball stuck in my hair, I think to myself, I'm glad we don't live together

Loveinapril · 11-01-2019 4:23pm

seamusk84 wrote: »

Married 9 years. I am my most uncensored self around my wife and her with me.

Yeah. I wouldn't speak the same around some of my friends the way I speak around my husband... they would probably stop being friends with me!

joe40 · 11-01-2019 4:24pm

Its funny how the word **** was once the real taboo swear word but it is becoming much more mainstream now.
I still don't use the word, it would just feel weird for me, but younger people are much more comfortable with it in everyday speech. Not judging by the way just an observation.

joe40 · 11-01-2019 4:25pm

I'm tryin to write the C word, boards won't let me. I didn't put in the ***

Porklife · 11-01-2019 4:25pm

joe40 wrote: »

Its funny how the word **** was once the real taboo swear word but it is becoming much more mainstream now.
I still don't use the word, it would just feel weird for me, but younger people are much more comfortable with it in everyday speech. Not judging by the way just an observation.

You seem lovely, like a real gentleman. The world needs more of people like you.

Deebles McBeebles · 11-01-2019 4:30pm

joe40 wrote: »

I'm tryin to write the C word, boards won't let me. I didn't put in the ***

Boards....such c*nts :pac:

Bigbagofcans · 11-01-2019 4:31pm

Porklife wrote: »

You seem lovely, like a real gentleman. The world needs more of people like you.

Some of the best men I know freely use the word c**t. They don't mean any offence.

Tell me how · 11-01-2019 4:35pm

Bigbagofcans wrote: »

Some of the best men I know freely use the word c**t. They don't mean any offence.

What do they use when they want to communicate offence?

I use it, but like to think it's warranted when I do.

Bigbagofcans · 11-01-2019 4:39pm

Tell me how wrote: »

What do they use when they want to communicate offence?

I use it, but like to think it's warranted when I do.

They'd use it more in slagging/jokey kinda ways, not as in calling someone it in a serious way.

joe40 · 11-01-2019 4:40pm

Bigbagofcans wrote: »

Some of the best men I know freely use the word c**t. They don't mean any offence.

I don't have a problem with that, I was just making the point that it seems to mebe an age thing. Or at least more accepted now.
I'm not prudish or reserved in any way but I was just noting how the swear word C*** has become more widely used than it used to be.
Of Course plenty of good people can swear without meaning offence.

And some really nasty people never swear!!

Deebles McBeebles · 11-01-2019 4:41pm

The way Billy Connolly uses the C word, or any swear word for that matter, is like poetry. It takes some of the offence out of it, no matter what he's said.

Acting differently around your partner...

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