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Hi all,
Vanilla are planning an update to the site on April 24th (next Wednesday). It is a major PHP8 update which is expected to boost performance across the site. The site will be down from 7pm and it is expected to take about an hour to complete. We appreciate your patience during the update.
Thanks all.

Dental plan!

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Comments

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    #1622
    wonton
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,214 ✭✭✭wonton


    (Homer driving around looking for lisa, stops the car and holds out a picture of lisa and is asking passer bys)


    Burns    : Shouldn't you be at work right now?

    Homer    : Uh yes sir, Mr. Burns, sir.

    Burns    : Well then, get back to wherever it is you work, whoever you are.


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    #1623
    Say Your Number
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 10,772 Mod ✭✭✭✭Say Your Number


    Not a quarter, Arrgh He'll be dancin' for hours


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    #1624
    folan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,630 ✭✭✭folan


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22N-TCZHeIY


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    #1625
    secrecy_ie
    Registered Users Posts: 139 ✭✭secrecy_ie


    But reckless spending and interracial homoeroticism were just volume one of the Encyclopedia Self-Destructica.


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    #1626
    dan1895
    Registered Users Posts: 4,597 ✭✭✭dan1895


    "You can run, but you can't glide"


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    #1627
    SlipperyPeople
    Registered Users Posts: 1,717 ✭✭✭SlipperyPeople


    Castro's aide: But Presidente! America tried to kill you!
    Fidel Castro: Ah, they're not so bad. They even named a street after me in San Francisco.
    Castro's aide: *whispers*
    Fidel Castro: It's full of WHAT?!!!


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    #1628
    secrecy_ie
    Registered Users Posts: 139 ✭✭secrecy_ie


    Krusty: Now, in the spirit of the season, start shopping! And for every dollar of Krusty merchandise you buy, I will be nice to a sick kid. For legal purposes, sick kids may include hookers with a cold.


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    #1629
    allym
    Registered Users Posts: 1,368 ✭✭✭allym


    Mr. Burns: Well, I guess it's impossible for one man to control all the media. Unless, of course, you're Rupert Murdoch. *Looks at camera* He is one beautiful man.


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    #1630
    Witcher
    Registered Users Posts: 14,432 ✭✭✭✭Witcher


    Jimbo:Hey, Simpson, I hear your sister dumped Christianity.

    Bart:Who cares?

    Dolph:I'll tell you someone who cares. He's got long hair, works as a carpenter, has a lot of crazy ideas about love and brotherhood.

    Jimbo:His name's Gunnar and he's dating my mom. Sometimes he buys us beer.


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    #1631
    dagdha
    Registered Users Posts: 645 ✭✭✭dagdha


    When I grow up I want to be a principal or a caterpiller.


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    #1632
    krudler
    Registered Users Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    Monorail episode

    "I just hope you have a damn good conductor"
    *cuts to Homer trying to jimmy open the train door*
    "nnng, I left my keys in there, get a rock"


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    #1633
    Teddy_Picker
    Registered Users Posts: 232 ✭✭Teddy_Picker


    Also from Monorail episode:

    Marge: We're too late!
    Cobb: I shouldn't have stopped for that haircut. Sorry.


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    #1634
    BOHtox
    Registered Users Posts: 4,314 ✭✭✭BOHtox




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    #1635
    talla10
    Registered Users Posts: 1,117 ✭✭✭talla10


    Bart; If it makes you feel better i belive after you die you can come back as anything you want. I'm gonna be a butterfly

    Lisa; How Come?

    Bart; Because nobody ever suspects the butterfly!!

    Bart imagines school burnt down with Skinner being dragged away by cops.

    Skinner; It wasent me!!It was the butterfly i tell you!!!The butterfly!!

    Wiggum; He's crazy boys!


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    #1636
    jd007
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,094 ✭✭✭jd007


    Homer: I lost my map


    Smithers: You haven't been issued a map yet.


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    #1637
    talla10
    Registered Users Posts: 1,117 ✭✭✭talla10


    Max Power the name you love to touch!!But you musnt touch! His name sounds good in your ear but when you hear it you musnt fear!!Cause his name can be said by anyone..


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    #1638
    Stinicker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 7,102 ✭✭✭Stinicker


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=714-Ioa4XQw


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    #1639
    Superbus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,784 ✭✭✭Superbus


    Lenny: Even Bart was throwin' dough around. He paid me and Carl $1000 to kiss each other.
    Carl: Hey, did we ever get that money?

    (long pause)


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    #1640
    Feeona
    Registered Users Posts: 1,633 ✭✭✭Feeona


    Hey, that's not the wallet inspector!



    That crusty old dean.


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    #1641
    krudler
    Registered Users Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    Homer: "Quiet down you two! this is thanksgiving so glue nice or I'll take your glue and then nobody will have any glue to glue with!"
    Lisa "Dad this isnt about glue, its about territoriality, he only wants the glue because I'm using it"
    Bary "Oh yeah, prove it!"
    *hands Bart glue"
    Bart: "hey man I dont want your stupid glue"


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    #1642
    Teddy_Picker
    Registered Users Posts: 232 ✭✭Teddy_Picker


    It's the theme..from a summer place...from a summer plaaace..it's the theme..from a summer place....oh it's the theme...


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    #1643
    Aldebaran
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,053 ✭✭✭Aldebaran


    'We'll take the Spruce Moose. Hop in!'

    'But sir...'

    'I said, HOP IN.'


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    #1644
    KnifeWRENCH
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,148 ✭✭✭✭KnifeWRENCH


    *Charlie is sucked up by a tube in Mr. Burns' office*

    Mr Burns: "Smithers, where does that tube go?"
    Smithers: "I'm not sure, sir; it was here when we first moved in."

    *Charlie lands in foreign country and is surrounded by men*

    Men: "DANCE! DANCE! DANCE! DANCE!"


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    #1645
    HUNK
    Closed Accounts Posts: 383 ✭✭HUNK


    Lurleen: Homer, I want you to be my manager.
    Homer: Really?! Well, I should warn you, I'm not great with figures.
    Lurleen: That's okay.
    Homer: I make a lot of stupid decisions.
    Lurleen: Nobody's perfect.
    Homer: I did bad in school.
    Lurleen: I didn't even go.
    Homer: My personal hygeine has been described as...
    Lurleen: Look, Homer I'm sure you'll make a great manager.


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    #1646
    Vicxas
    Registered Users Posts: 15,258 ✭✭✭✭Vicxas


    Homer: "Hello, my name is MR Burns, I believe you have a package for me".

    Agent: "Ok Mr Burns, and whats your first name?"

    Homer: "I Dont know"


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    #1647
    efb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 35,514 ✭✭✭✭efb


    wob wob wob wob wob wob wob wob wob


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    #1648
    im invisible
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,373 ✭✭✭im invisible


    crowd at ice hocky game:

    kill bart, kill bart, kill.. bart kill, bart kill, bart kill


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    #1649
    AlmightyCushion
    Moderators, Education Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 35,046 Mod ✭✭✭✭AlmightyCushion


    What trillion dollar bill?


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    #1650
    Töpher
    Registered Users Posts: 8,484 ✭✭✭Töpher


    Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins.

    Homer Simpson, smiling politely.


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    #1651
    Lapin
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 18,184 ✭✭✭✭Lapin


    If you dip your chocolate Hob Nob into your mug of tea at a 38 degree angle, it is less likely to break in half and sink into your beverage than dipping it straight down.

    Mathamaticians have discovered that this is due to blah blah blah fúcking blah.

    But in fairness, its true.

    I tried it.



    Doesn't work for plain Hob Nobs though.
    Don't ask me why.


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