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Bride - Nervous about trying on dresses

  • 28-10-2019 10:20pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 73 ✭✭


    As the title says I’m very apprehensive about trying on dresses. I really don’t have a clue about what styles will suit me and I have no dream dress in mind despite having bought the magazines, looked online and looked through friends photos.

    I’m now into the 6 month countdown and I have made some appointments to go and try on dresses. Will the sales assistants try dresses that suit my body shape or how does it work? I have booked shops that are local to me but I have no idea what the quality etc will be like.

    I am most nervous about being put into something that I’ll look silly in, I’m bringing my sister with me who would be very honest but we have very different tastes in clothing.

    Any advice appreciated to help ease the apprehension.


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,449 ✭✭✭✭pwurple


    Give a few shapes a go , and if they are silly looking, then rule them out.
    That's really the way a lot of us figure this stuff out!

    And bring someone else with you too if you don't like your sisters taste.


  • Registered Users Posts: 73 ✭✭foodie86


    pwurple wrote: »
    Give a few shapes a go , and if they are silly looking, then rule them out.
    That's really the way a lot of us figure this stuff out!

    And bring someone else with you too if you don't like your sisters taste.


    Ok thanks I was hoping the shop assistants would recommend what would suit my shapes but is this not the case?

    The only other person I would have to bring is my mother but she won’t have a clue what goes.

    I’m really not looking forward to the whole thing and I’m not one bit excited about it so other people think I’m strange!


  • Registered Users Posts: 28,668 ✭✭✭✭HeidiHeidi


    Forget about it being a wedding dress, and just think about what you would wear usually - what suits you in your everyday or dressy uppy clothes


    V-neck, scoop neck, high neck?
    Empire line, loose fit, waisted?
    Full skirt, pencil skirt, long or mid length?
    Sleeves or no?
    Plain or fussy detail?
    Light, floaty material or heavy/stiff /"structured"?



    I bet you'd have an opinion on those kind of details if you were buying, say, a dress for a Christmas do (I certainly would, and haven't bought a dress in literally decades!)


    If you start with those kind of details and bring them with you, I bet the staff will be able to point you in the right direction to start at least.


  • Registered Users Posts: 25 IndigoStar


    Its a few years since I bought mine but when I went into bridal shop they told me to pick what I liked and then they gathered them together for me and set me up in fitting room.
    Some were nicer on the hanger, some suited me. Try as many as you like and you will start to get a feel for what you like and what suits you.
    Enjoy it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,101 ✭✭✭brianblaze


    foodie86 wrote: »
    As the title says I’m very apprehensive about trying on dresses. I really don’t have a clue about what styles will suit me and I have no dream dress in mind despite having bought the magazines, looked online and looked through friends photos.

    I’m now into the 6 month countdown and I have made some appointments to go and try on dresses. Will the sales assistants try dresses that suit my body shape or how does it work? I have booked shops that are local to me but I have no idea what the quality etc will be like.

    I am most nervous about being put into something that I’ll look silly in, I’m bringing my sister with me who would be very honest but we have very different tastes in clothing.

    Any advice appreciated to help ease the apprehension.

    So I film weddings for a living, and one of the best things I heard a bride say was she went on pinterest and made a board of dresses she liked, from all sorts of styles over a week. (She also made a list of weird detail stuff for the ceremony etc from places like Wish and Ali Express etc)

    Then her and her friends had a few bottles of wine, laughed their collectives ar$es off at some of the dresses and detail stuff, but made note of what they did like, and then that weekend they went to a dress shop with a few ideas of dress styles and got the perfect one. (She also spent a fortune on Wish, so maybe avoid that list! Ha!)

    Best of luck!


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  • Registered Users Posts: 4,812 ✭✭✭Addle


    The lady who works in Dinagh Modes in Castlerea has a brilliant reputation for for knowing exactly what suits her clients, often going completely against their intentions, but always proven right.
    I’ve known her to diagnose someone after she noticed a posture issue, she’s that good.
    May be worth a trip.


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,890 Mod ✭✭✭✭shesty


    If you know what you don't like, that's a good starting point.
    After that you just try on everything you see that you like.Totally normal, appointments are usually an hour long for a reason!


  • Registered Users Posts: 219 ✭✭MiliMe


    I was quite similar to you, not very girly or into wearing dresses. I went into one shop and the assistant told me to look through the rails and pull what i liked the look of.
    I ended up trying on all different styles and figured out that i liked one that i never though i would.
    Just go with it and don't be afraid to try things. If your sales assistant is worth her salt, she will guide you and make you feel very comfortable.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,449 ✭✭✭✭pwurple


    foodie86 wrote: »
    Ok thanks I was hoping the shop assistants would recommend what would suit my shapes but is this not the case?

    I mean, they can take a basic guess, but it's very hard to know what you will feel comfortable in, just by looking at you with your clothes on. I know there is this supposed dark art and rule set about pear shapes and apple shapes etc, but you're an individual, so this is kinda bespoke.


    No reason to think you're weird not looking forward to it. I found it a complete chore too. Plenty of us aren't up for hauling giant dresses around a room and trying to delicatly climb in and out of them. Also, nearly every wedding dress gets fitted, so it can be tricky to know how they look when they get everyone to try on size 16 dresses and take a guess at how it looks from there. Depends on the shop, some have a great range of sizes which works better.

    It's just one of those things that had to be done.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,323 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    Yeah I was also one who found it a chore. I remember choosing my dress and on the way back to the car, my biggest thought was "glad I never have to do that again". In the first shop I went to, they handed me little tags to hang on the hangers of the dresses I liked and they were brought to me, or a similar style if they didn't have my (plus) size. The lady helping encouraged me to try dresses I wasn't into and I found that it made me change my mind from some definite "no" dresses I saw. If you hate the idea of having an audience, go alone the first time to get a feel for what you like.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 73 ✭✭foodie86


    Thanks you all for the helpful suggestions, it’s good to know I’m not the only one who is thinks of it as a chore. The strange thing is I’m very into my clothes I love shopping but generally my style is very dressy casual. I’ve looked on Asos/Folkster for inspiration but the dresses are very feminine and floaty and not really my style.

    I’m going to book another shop or two it’s a pain though when most charge a deposit for the session so it’s ending up being quite an expense at €30 for most. Will try and get some more images of what I kind of like and I might investigate getting one made also.

    I definitely what I hate so I suppose that’s a good starting point!
    Appreciate everyone’s replies they’ve certainly helped me feel a little better about the whole experience.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,323 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    I cannot believe you have to pay to see dresses!! Debenhams have wedding dresses and I would imagine you wouldn't need an appointment to try them on. Asos or Littlewoods sometimes have them so you could order a few and return them, but it will give you a sense of what type might suit.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,812 ✭✭✭Addle


    You’re paying for a consultation, which can be worth every cent and cheap in the long run.


  • Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    I didn't pay for any appointments, nor would I as I'm a cheapskate :p, I went up north to get mine when the exchange rate was quite good.

    I went in with an idea of what I'd like, but decided that I would try on all shapes, if nothing else I'd get a laugh. I had a person with me who's honest but focused on what suited me and what I liked rather than her own personal taste. Also make sure that she's able to discreetly get the dress details or a sneaky picture of you in it.

    So I tried on a few and very quickly I got a feel for the shapes that did nothing for me including the one I had in my head. Once that was determined, then I tried on a few to determine shade and the other smaller details.

    The one you can't stop thinking about and the one where you like everything about it is probably your ideal dress.


  • Registered Users Posts: 73 ✭✭foodie86


    Addle wrote: »
    You’re paying for a consultation, which can be worth every cent and cheap in the long run.

    I have no problem paying if the consultation is genuine. However very difficult to know in advance if said shops are any good as I have no one to ask.

    When you factor in visiting a few shops who charge, travel expenses and taking time off work it all adds up unfortunately.

    Have looked online but v difficult to know what will suit me as I don’t have a long body and can’t stand in high heels so will stick with flats on the day. Also ordering online to just try on is expensive as I don’t have a credit card and have to wait for money to be refunded.


  • Hosted Moderators Posts: 11,362 ✭✭✭✭Scarinae


    I haven't heard of being charged for appointments either :confused:

    For any appointments I've gone along to, they've asked me what my budget is and if I have any ideas of the sort of dress I was looking for e.g. colour, shape of skirt etc. I didn't have a set idea in mind for myself, more the type of thing I didn't want (I was fairly certain I didn't want a strapless dress) but it is still good to try a few different styles on. You might be surprised about what you like! If you're really unsure, I'm sure the sales assistants will be able to suggest ideas though.

    I think you're right to bring one honest person along, I hear about people bringing along their bridesmaids and all their female relatives to their appointments and I think it's too many.

    I wouldn't worry about looking silly in something - if you do, you can just have a giggle and move onto the next one. The staff in these shops will have seen all sorts anyway.


  • Registered Users Posts: 73 ✭✭foodie86


    Been looking online at the stock shops have and finding it hard to choose which shops to visit, if anyone has any recommendations of good quality bridal stores in Munster I would appreciate it.

    No budget at the minute as I haven’t a clue what a dress can cost and I’ll obviously pay more if I love something.

    Thanks to everyone for helping out my mind at ease about trying on, still a little anxious but gonna just go with it now and hope for the best experience!


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,825 ✭✭✭LirW


    Just to keep in mind: with 6 months left it might not be possible anymore to order a dress in, depending on the shop or designer or you might have to pay extra for a rush order if possible. For your own peace of mind go to shops where you can purchase off the rack, like Wed2be for example, you go home with your dress on the day.
    Loads of lovely dresses out there, I'd ring ahead though and tell them that you're 6 months out. No point in putting you into a dress that's the one for you that'll be impossible to order in time.
    If there is a certain dress you like, there is a huge amount of unaltered second hand stock too and Oxfam bridal is also an option.


  • Registered Users Posts: 73 ✭✭foodie86


    LirW wrote: »
    Just to keep in mind: with 6 months left it might not be possible anymore to order a dress in, depending on the shop or designer or you might have to pay extra for a rush order if possible.



    Seriously? God I never knew that, never even occurred to me. God it’s a mine field, how is one supposed to know these things.

    Thanks for that I’ll keep it in mind now, v hard to go to shops when I work full time. Might consider getting one made if I can come up with some idea of what suits me.


  • Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    I got mine in just under 5 months and that was a rush order apparently.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,889 ✭✭✭SozBbz


    yeah you are supposed to shop 9months + in advance if you want all options open to you.

    6 months is not impossible, but you're on the verge of cutting it fine.

    IMO you need to make a few appointments. Ring around and try to get a saturday appointment somewhere. A lot of brides I know took a day off work and went around a few places in the same day - would that be an option?

    Alternatively look for shops that will sell our of stock or off the rack? Off hand I can think of Wed2be (Drumcondra, Dublin) or Smart Brides (Portlaoise) that will have stock ready to go out the door. I'm sure there are others so worth looking into.


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional East Moderators, Regional North West Moderators Posts: 11,918 Mod ✭✭✭✭miamee


    A lot of the shops will tell you how tight 6 months is etc. but at the end of the day they want to make a sale so they will ask you straight away when the wedding is and try on the dresses that can be ordered in that time. My sister bought a dress in the January and got married at the start of July the same year. Again, she got the whole "oh that's cutting it a bit fine" but she just ignored that and tried on the dresses she liked, picked one knowing that they could do it in the time frame (they still told her they'd have to put a rush on it). It was the perfect dress for her and she looked fab on the day.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,353 ✭✭✭pooch90


    foodie86 wrote: »
    Been looking online at the stock shops have and finding it hard to choose which shops to visit, if anyone has any recommendations of good quality bridal stores in Munster I would appreciate it.

    No budget at the minute as I haven’t a clue what a dress can cost and I’ll obviously pay more if I love something.

    Thanks to everyone for helping out my mind at ease about trying on, still a little anxious but gonna just go with it now and hope for the best experience!
    Where in Munster are you? I got mine In Carrick on Suir in Tipp. They were great. Didnt try a hard sell. Could tell by me what I didnt feel comfortable in and suggest little tweaks to help. They actually have a ballgown sale on at the minute.
    I tried Jeutonic in Kilkenny too and had a good laugh with the girl there. She was very blunt about what didnt suit me and made me feel amazing in the dresses I did like.
    Just dont take it too seriously. It's meant to be enjoyable so maybe book a lunch or something else on the day so it's a day out rather than a chore.


  • Registered Users Posts: 73 ✭✭foodie86


    Little update. Visited a few different shops last week and wasn’t blown away by anything I tried on.
    Experience was grand, didn’t feel the store assistants tried too hard to sell which was good but also they didn’t go out of their way to choose dresses that suited my shape which annoyed me. (Despite me asking their opinion)

    Can’t get over how heavy some of the dresses were, and how revealing! So fitted with boobs and back on shown in a lot of them and loads of diamanté detailing which I find really tacky. The search continues. I’m a few shops in the midlands I'm thinking of trekking to in the hope they have dresses that are a little more demure.

    I dont think I’ll ever really enjoy the whole dress thing but it has to be done so I’ll keep searching. Thanks all for the advice.


  • Registered Users Posts: 89 ✭✭Millypenny


    You might have tried this place already, but there's a bridal shop in Miltown Malbay, Co. Clare called the Bridal Emporium. I was there a few years ago with my sister-in-law when she was trying to decide on dresses for the bridesmaids. She ended up buying the two bridesmaid dresses there, after looking in a few other bridal shops. We all thought the owner was lovely, not pushy in any way, and seemed to know what styles etc. would suit people.


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