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Cheated, now separating, do I have to leave house?

  • 12-09-2019 11:40am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I cheated on my wife and told her that i wanted to leave her. For the last week I have stayed away from the house.

    Am i entitled to stay in our family home while things settle? We would both prefer if i wasn't there but its not an option financially.

    Is there anything to be aware of while living in the same house with both looking after the children if we're seperating?


Comments

  • #2
    jimmycrackcorm
    Registered Users Posts: 14,329 ✭✭✭✭jimmycrackcorm


    Do not move out.

    You will Suffer very much if you do being obliged to pay for everything and having to struggle.
    By staying until a proper separation can be organised, you'll have a much better chance to get a fairer access and paying out.


  • #3
    ksceniaonegina
    Registered Users Posts: 118 ✭✭ksceniaonegina


    This guy cheated on his wife and you want him to be constantly around to remind her of the pain


  • #4
    Emmersonn
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,128 ✭✭✭Emmersonn


    ksceniaonegina wrote: »
    This guy cheated on his wife and you want him to be constantly around to remind her of the pain
    If it upsets her that much, let her move out. He legally owns half their property.


  • #5
    dvdman1
    Registered Users Posts: 512 ✭✭✭dvdman1


    ksceniaonegina wrote: »
    This guy cheated on his wife and you want him to be constantly around to remind her of the pain

    The OP is asking for advice that will help him not to be judged


  • #6
    A2LUE42
    Registered Users Posts: 2,532 ✭✭✭A2LUE42


    Read about 'No fault Divorce' op.


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  • #7
    mvl
    Registered Users Posts: 1,229 ✭✭✭mvl


    Dado Dado wrote: »
    I cheated on my wife and told her that i wanted to leave her. For the last week I have stayed away from the house.

    Am i entitled to stay in our family home while things settle? We would both prefer if i wasn't there but its not an option financially.

    Is there anything to be aware of while living in the same house with both looking after the children if we're seperating?


    - I've no background in how things are working here on this from legal point of view

    TBH, depends if you want to remarry or not.

    Rather than moving out and then expose your kids to another dad or mum who might move in later - I'd favor co-parenting in same house, while adults can "date" outside the home.

    Depends on the age of your kids, what the wife needs/expects and so on...


  • #8
    tedpan
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 4,627 Mod ✭✭✭✭tedpan


    ksceniaonegina wrote:
    This guy cheated on his wife and you want him to be constantly around to remind her of the pain


    This is a guest thread from a month ago. I'm guessing the OP is long gone...


  • #9
    tony1980
    Registered Users Posts: 1,607 ✭✭✭tony1980


    Advice would be not to move out, at least yet. Go through mediation to sort things legally first. Eventually, a Judicial Seperation order will probably favor her but it gives time to sort things amicably. It might be the OP’s fault but it’s best to sort things legally first despite the pain. If they can be grown ups about the Seperation at least, it will help the kids long term.


  • #10
    paw patrol
    Registered Users Posts: 2,314 ✭✭✭paw patrol


    if you move out the judge will see that you are surviving in a new place and your wife in your current house.

    she mighnt get ownership of the house but will defo be allowed stay there...you'll be waiting years to get your share.

    best stick it out and sell the house (your share) in the separation or divorce.


  • #11
    LastStop
    Registered Users Posts: 308 ✭✭LastStop


    I always wondered, if the guy moves out and then decides to move back in, say before it gets to court for judicial separation case, is there anything to prevent him from doing so?


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  • #12
    AulWan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,653 ✭✭✭AulWan


    Legally, you do not have to move out of the house.

    Morally, you should.


  • #13
    AulWan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,653 ✭✭✭AulWan


    LastStop wrote: »
    I always wondered, if the guy moves out and then decides to move back in, say before it gets to court for judicial separation case, is there anything to prevent him from doing so?
    Nope. He can move back in at any time.


  • #14
    bizidea
    Registered Users Posts: 403 ✭✭bizidea


    AulWan wrote: »
    Nope. He can move back in at any time.

    Why not its half his house


  • #15
    AulWan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,653 ✭✭✭AulWan


    bizidea wrote: »
    Why not its half his house

    I think you need to re-read what i posted. :confused:


  • #16
    Weltsmertz
    Registered Users Posts: 308 ✭✭Weltsmertz


    Difficult. Know people that have stayed living in same house after seperation and it is awkward and uncomfortable. But you will have access to kids and get a much better deal.
    The alternative is probably a rented house sharing with students or move home to mammy. Neither ideal for mental health either.


  • #17
    bizidea
    Registered Users Posts: 403 ✭✭bizidea


    AulWan wrote: »
    I think you need to re-read what i posted. :confused:

    Ha I'll have to start wearing my glasses more often


  • #18
    Iodine1
    Registered Users Posts: 377 ✭✭Iodine1


    Weltsmertz wrote: »
    Difficult. Know people that have stayed living in same house after seperation and it is awkward and uncomfortable. But you will have access to kids and get a much better deal.
    The alternative is probably a rented house sharing with students or move home to mammy. Neither ideal for mental health either.

    Yes, agreed but to add, often end up on the street as single men find it impossible to get a room, flat or anything to put a roof over them, (and yet may be still be paying maintenance).


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