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Potential relationship with a Brazilian guy.

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Comments

  • #32
    imme
    Registered Users Posts: 3,200 ✭✭✭imme


    Joeytheparrot wrote: »
    Is this like the urban myth about a woman leaving her pram on the bus. It might have happened once but there's now thousands of pram stories and everybody knows someone who knows someone who's cousins aunties brothers wife was on the bus when the pram was left behind.

    Why would someone make either story up?

    I have seen some gold digging on the of Brazilian students in Ireland.
    Obviously not every student.

    Someone looking for a big a commitment as big as marriage would raise alarm bells for me.


  • #33
    Annasopra
    Registered Users Posts: 40,787 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    imme wrote: »
    Why would someone make either story up?

    I have seen some gold digging on the of Brazilian students in Ireland.
    Obviously not every student.

    Someone looking for a big a commitment as big as marriage would raise alarm bells for me.

    The problem is that people here ARE stereotyping ALL Brazilians.

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • #34
    max307
    Registered Users Posts: 19 ✭max307


    I’m in a similar situation the only difference is that I was used and manipulated by an Irish guy to get a Green Card (obviously not in Ireland). Does that mean that I’m going to assume that every Irish guy approaching me is looking for the same in the future? Absolutely no!

    I would say enjoy yourself and do not think too much about it, eventually your gut will tell you the right path to take.

    I can see why the guy could be anxious about the visa situation in Ireland. We all read the news and see the state of the immigration process with fake schools ripping off students and shame marriages and all that. I would be anxious as well!


  • #35
    machaseh
    Registered Users Posts: 777 ✭✭✭machaseh


    Jaysus, what a bunch of racists the lot of ye are.

    'Oh he's Brazilian, he must cheat a lot'.

    'Oh he's Brazilian, he must be in it only for the marriage'

    'Oh he's Brazilian, he must have STDs'

    Come here now. :')

    Just like with dating ANY OTHER person, just be mindful of the following. Set realistic expectations between yous. How long is he planning on staying in Ireland? What are his possibilities should he want to stay longer and extend his visa? Is he illegal or legal? Is he eligible for work? What is the financial situation like? Has he good English? What is his situation in Brazil like, does he own a house there, sick family members etc.?

    I virtually only date Brazilian guys meself. But because me mam was Brazilian (bless her), I have Portuguese so communication is never a problem for me even if they have very little English. I did once have a negative experience where my (absolutely gorgeous and really nice) date started asking for money. But he had already mentioned from the beginning that he wouldn't be staying in Ireland for a very long time and that money was a problem. I should have cut it short earlier. Never ended up giving him money of course.


  • #36
    Rick_
    Registered Users Posts: 2,606 ✭✭✭Rick_


    I once dated a Greek guy who told me on our first date that Greek guys are very full on and passionate, they tend to like someone and want to stick with them no matter what and then can be very forward in every aspect of their life. He almost said it like a warning.

    It went alright for a few dates but when I decided I wasn't really into him, he showed me how clingy and 'passionate' he was by not letting me get away from him that easy. It was actually a bit of a nightmare as it started to seem quite creepy very quickly. At least he warned me about the stereotypes so I knew what was likely to happen. Doesn't change the fact it was a weird situation though. Thankfully he eventually just let it go and doesn't contact me any more. Sometimes the stereotypes are accurate! Just make sure you both understand the boundaries and expectations if it is to go forward.


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