Have you ever known anyone to hold a funeral for there pet?

AMKC · 13-01-2021 12:37am #1

So I was watching a show this morning an American show and one of the lads cat had died. So he decided to hold a big funeral for It. What do you think of this? I thought it was over the top myself but then I have heard of people marrying there pets too which is even crazier.

anewme · 13-01-2021 12:50am

We buried the dog in the back garden as a family.. Had him 18 years. Had him from when I was 8 till 26 so very much a part of my life. No shame in it. Whatever gets you through. RIP our Dukie, the best dog.

An Ri rua · 13-01-2021 12:57am

We did the same. For a dog of 12 years and a cat of 15. Stood over their graves, after I'd dug at least 3ft deep, out of respect to their poor bones, and we said our goodbyes.
The cat's death in particular, went very hard on my elderly parents. Their daily companion, gone.
It's a heavy load, when a longtime pet dies. End of an era in a family. So to each their own. People are having services partly because they're being offered, because burying your pet out back is not seen as the done thing any more. To hell with that. All our pets are safe as houses on our ground. For my lifetime anyway.
I'd still mark their anniversaries and sit out and have a smoke with them. Or a few silent minutes. They bring a huge amount of joy in our lives, our comical little furry friends. The full range of emotions actually. Including exasperation!!!
Who knows what lies ahead. But to each their own.

Cerveza · 13-01-2021 1:40am

Always dig a good grave and give the dog a goodbye. No funeral per se.

Capt'n Midnight · 13-01-2021 2:05am

Virgil (15 October 70 BC – 21 September 19 BC) had a pet fly, and when the insect died, Virgil spent 800,000 sesterces—nearly all of his net worth—for an extravagant funeral. Celebrities swarmed the poet’s home. Professional mourners wailed. An orchestra performed a lament. Virgil drafted verses to celebrate the fly’s memory. After the service, the fly’s body was ceremoniously deposited in a mausoleum the poet had built on his estate.

In case you didn't guess it was part a property tax avoidance scheme.

Odeta · 13-01-2021 7:35am

The garden in the family home has graves of much loved pets. They are marked by different plants reflecting the pets personality ... Diarmuid Gavin would not be impressed! When I’m coming back up the avenue after a walk, they still, after all these years evoke a flood of happy memories.

Peregrinus · 13-01-2021 8:06am

An Ri rua wrote: »

We did the same. For a dog of 12 years and a cat of 15. Stood over their graves, after I'd dug at least 3ft deep, out of respect to their poor bones, and we said our goodbyes.

The carcass of your deceased pet is, I'm sorry to have to tell you, an "animal by-product", and the handling and disposal of animal by-products is strictly requlated by law, especially since the BSE outbreak. In general you can bury your pet in the garden provided there is no danger of contamination of water sources (which there mostly wouldn't be, in a suburban garden) and provided the grave is at least 1.2 m deep. 3 feet (= 91 cm) is not enough. But check first of all with your local authority that there aren't by-laws that apply locally that impose further restrictions.

mariaalice · 13-01-2021 10:27am

Not exactly a funeral but my ex-husband buried the dog in the garden and make it a grave with a little headstone and he was as devastated as if a human had died. Never underestimate the companionship an animal provides to someone on their own.

The garden is massive maybe an acre of ground and a little stand of trees.

Pauliedragon · 13-01-2021 11:01am

Apparently cremating pets is getting very popular. Not sure what people do with the ashes.

...Ghost... · 13-01-2021 11:48am

Depends what you mean by big funeral. Are we talking 50+ people? An expensive coffin, sermon, graveyard and reception after? Or are we talking about some family members mourning the death of a beloved pet in a small gathering and burial?

2 of my dogs died last year within a couple of months of eachother. They were dearly loved and spent the last 4 years living at my inlaws due to an unseen child biting incident. They were buried out their back yard and silence was given for thought. It was the right way to reflect on their lives.

Apparently my hamster was buried when I was a child. I've no memory of it. It's a nice way to say goodbye and teach children a little about life and death.

fryup · 13-01-2021 11:50am

Pauliedragon wrote: »

Apparently cremating pets is getting very popular. Not sure what people do with the ashes.

compost?

El_Duderino 09 · 13-01-2021 11:51am

anewme wrote: »

We buried the dog in the back garden as a family.. Had him 18 years. Had him from when I was 8 till 26 so very much a part of my life. No shame in it. Whatever gets you through. RIP our Dukie, the best dog.

Dukie like the Boyce’s dog in only fools and horses?

Yeah I might have a little funeral for my pet if the time arose. I wouldn’t consider that weird at all. Pets are very important to some people.

But if you expect other people to go to the funeral and be sad, then you’re being weird.

Stephen Gawking · 13-01-2021 11:56am

Mate of mine, his wife was inconsolable when their dog died. Was like a child etc etc. She wanted it buried in the garden, fair enough. However, she wanted a headstone for the dog. Went & priced one at a local stonemasons. They thought it was a wind up & declined to do it. She lost the plot, they called the gards. She ended up getting a marble plaque in the back garden & she goes into full blown mourning mode on the dogs anniversary.

gipi · 13-01-2021 12:05pm

Pauliedragon wrote: »

Apparently cremating pets is getting very popular. Not sure what people do with the ashes.

I had a cat cremated about 10 years ago. The ashes were wrapped in paper, and put into a decorative wooden box (shaped like a book with a sleeping cat on top) - it sits on a sideboard in my lounge.

I was burgled a few years ago and the thieves stuck a knife or similar into the wrapped ashes to see what was inside.

theguzman · 13-01-2021 12:46pm

There is far too much humanisation of animals these days. I find it abhorrent that people would get so upset and mourn for weeks for a dog.

RubyK · 13-01-2021 12:53pm

Pauliedragon wrote: »

Apparently cremating pets is getting very popular. Not sure what people do with the ashes.

We cremated our beloved dog, 3 years ago. Her ashes are in a decorative box in a cabinet along with her picture and her collar. Myself and my husband agreed, that whichever of us dies first, she will be put in the coffin also. Might sound crazy to some folk, but that's what we want :pac:

Edgware · 13-01-2021 12:54pm

The local takeaway restaurant can take care of funeral arrangements if you wish

TheValeyard · 13-01-2021 1:10pm

Pets like dogs n cats become part of the family. You can have them 10+ years, see them day in and day out. Nothing wrong with giving them a family send off.

feartuath · 13-01-2021 1:13pm

When I was a kid our gold fish when died was fed to the cat.
Might have been something to do with growing up on a farm in the 70's

CB19Kevo · 13-01-2021 1:18pm

theguzman wrote: »

There is far too much humanisation of animals these days. I find it abhorrent that people would get so upset and mourn for weeks for a dog.

You are entitled to your opinion but for me pets are part of the family and the loss of a much loved pet can be a very challenging time!!

Cerveza · 13-01-2021 1:21pm

Poor Mary ended up in the dyson.

bb1234567 · 13-01-2021 4:14pm

Why would you not ?

A little dote who stayed by your side your whole life and devoted their entire love to you , should be appreciated with a funeral like any human. My family will definitely have some kind of event and nice words to say for our dog as a formal goodbye when her time comes.

bb1234567 · 13-01-2021 4:18pm

theguzman wrote: »

There is far too much humanisation of animals these days. I find it abhorrent that people would get so upset and mourn for weeks for a dog.

Not everyone is lucky enough to have close friends or family around them especially in old age and animals can fill that gap very well and provide immense comfort to people who are lonely (but also even to many who aren't , of course). I think it is such a weird thing to find abhorrent tbh.

Ave Sodalis · 13-01-2021 4:33pm

Pauliedragon wrote:

Apparently cremating pets is getting very popular. Not sure what people do with the ashes.

I have my dog's in a walnut box in the sitting room with his collar on top. That way if I move, he can come with.

theguzman wrote:

There is far too much humanisation of animals these days. I find it abhorrent that people would get so upset and mourn for weeks for a dog.

Yeah, my last dog saved my life. He provided more companionship and support than any human could come close to claiming. He helped me through some very dark days, days that were caused by people. Even now, having had a horrendously sh*t week, I took his box of ashes to bed with me. Forget weeks, I'll probably never fully stop mourning that dog.
I never "humanise" my animals. They're animals and get treated as such. That doesn't mean they don't mean more to me than majority of people. I'm not sure how you could spend almost every day with a pet for the guts of a decade, and not get upset when it passes.

AMKC · 13-01-2021 9:35pm

I have no problem with someone burying the own pet in there backward and saying there good byes. I too have done that. It is hiring a funeral home or a reception and having the dead pet on display as you remember it that is taking it a bit far next think you know they will be in a coffin in the middle and people will be expected to kiss them lol.

Baggly · 13-01-2021 10:08pm

One of our kittens was hit by a car at the weekend. He was only 6 months but we had him from birth.

I will admit i was absolutely gutted (and still am). He was such a lovely dope of a cat; and his sister, my kids & my wife are all a bit lost without him.

I found him Sunday morning so brought him home and we buried him at the top of the back garden. I ordered a lovely tree we will plant behind where he is buried - and the my kids were up the garden today to say prayers and have some chats with him.

I wouldnt really be religious, so no funeral per se, but it was helpful and nice to bury him close to home and to have something to remember him by.

Peregrinus · 14-01-2021 1:53am

Baggly wrote: »

I found him Sunday morning so brought him home and we buried him at the top of the back garden. I ordered a lovely tree we will plant behind where he is buried . . .

You can grow a good rose on a dead cat. Just sayin'.

Baggly · 14-01-2021 8:33am

Peregrinus wrote: »

You can grow a good rose on a dead cat. Just sayin'.

I spent the summer clearing brambles from that area so not keep to plant more thorny plants

14-01-2021 11:32am

AMKC wrote: »

It is hiring a funeral home or a reception and having the dead pet on display as you remember it that is taking it a bit far

I guess most things are not "too far" if it is what gets the people involved through. Funerals are for the living not the dead after all. They give closure and solace and community and so forth to the living. The dead likely do not care a jot unless some of the more seemingly nonsense notions people have about life after death turn out to be true.

I for example live with a creature I imported - at some legal risk - from the US. It is an animal that simply can not be left alone like many people would a cat or dog. So it has pretty much been my 100% constant companion at home and at work for over a decade. When he dies - a part of me will too. And I have my own ideas and plans on the closure I am going to need when that occurs.

So if an open casket in a home followed by a coffin burial is actually what some people want/need then that's fine. I can see no problem with that - let alone to the point I would use an emotive word like "abhorrent". A word chosen probably just to get a reaction I suspect.

What worries me sometimes though - with people as well as pets - is whether most people actually do need any of that. Or have we successfully been advertised and sold the narrative that that is the closure we need by an industry that is - lets face it - far from cheap and probably quite profitable. Closure could be quite individual - so I am suspicious of a one size fits all pre-packaged closure.

I am all for people getting the closure they need. I am paranoid that industry has manged to too heavily influence peoples narratives on what it is they think they need though.

seamus · 14-01-2021 11:38am

Pauliedragon wrote: »

Apparently cremating pets is getting very popular. Not sure what people do with the ashes.

We have the ashes of our dog sitting in a wardrobe because it's just been too mental a year to figure out what we want to do long-term.

We don't expect to stay in our current house forever so we don't want to bury her in the garden. We might scatter all or some of it in her favourites places, and we might stick her on a shelf in the kitchen.

I would generally consider expensive funerals for people to be ostentatious anyway, so I would roll my eyes at the same done for a pet. But ultimately there's no right or wrong way to grieve. Whatever you need to do to help you get through it.

Baggly · 14-01-2021 12:15pm

Deleted User wrote: »

I guess most things are not "too far" if it is what gets the people involved through. Funerals are for the living not the dead after all. They give closure and solace and community and so forth to the living. The dead likely do not care a jot unless some of the more seemingly nonsense notions people have about life after death turn out to be true.

I for example live with a creature I imported - at some legal risk - from the US. It is an animal that simply can not be left alone like many people would a cat or dog. So it has pretty much been my 100% constant companion at home and at work for over a decade. When he dies - a part of me will too. And I have my own ideas and plans on the closure I am going to need when that occurs.

So if an open casket in a home followed by a coffin burial is actually what some people want/need then that's fine. I can see no problem with that - let alone to the point I would use an emotive word like "abhorrent". A word chosen probably just to get a reaction I suspect.

What worries me sometimes though - with people as well as pets - is whether most people actually do need any of that. Or have we successfully been advertised and sold the narrative that that is the closure we need by an industry that is - lets face it - far from cheap and probably quite profitable. Closure could be quite individual - so I am suspicious of a one size fits all pre-packaged closure.

I am all for people getting the closure they need. I am paranoid that industry has manged to too heavily influence peoples narratives on what it is they think they need though.

Bald Eagle?

Have you ever known anyone to hold a funeral for there pet?

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