The emotions of learning about tragic cases

yaledo · 05-09-2018 4:37pm #1

I remember shortly after I got started on genealogy, I discovered my wife's great-great-grandmother's census entry. It showed she had had 10 children, of whom only 2 had survived. From my point of view, this was just another interesting data point. It was only when I started cheerily showing this to my wife's granny, that I realised the awful tragedy it represented. The two children in question were of course the mother uncle of my wife's granny.

Recently, I was trawling through death records for Galway city in the 1930s. I noticed that about half the deaths in the city seemed to be of young people dying from TB, with the informant being a member of staff of the isolation hospital in Renmore. People in their 30s, their 20s, teenagers and even children.

I found it too upsetting to continue, so I stopped that line of research. I suppose that you just need to 'suck it up' sometimes. Maybe it helps to realise that in a way, just by reading their names and the tragic circumstances of their deaths, you are honouring their memory.

pinkypinky · 05-09-2018 5:52pm

Here's something I find useful in these circumstances.

We're always going to discover infant, child or young adult deaths in our research. And sometimes these people have been entirely forgotten. I like to think of it as restoring them to family memory, even if there's no one now alive who would have known them. Last year I discovered my grandfather was one of 5 boys not 4. An older brother had died just before his 2nd birthday, before my grandfather was even born, but now we know again that there was another little boy called James, who was loved and lost, because I thought to check for others, just in case.

Jellybaby1 · 05-09-2018 9:04pm

I agree with pinky. It strains the heartstrings when you start but eventually you come to realise that you are honoured with recording them and their short lives. It was a surprise for me to find I had an uncle I didn't know about. He died at the age of 1 year and 11 months - hard to imagine any uncle that age. When I was searching for my grandfather I was looking for an old man. He died at the age of 23 from TB. I don't think I've ever 'sucked it up', but they can now at least take their place on our family tree. Remember, you're doing a good thing.

kanadams123 · 05-09-2018 10:03pm

Wow..that is truly tragic.

I have a family in my tree that had 13 total children..and 5 of them died before age 4 and 1 died aged 14.
What i found more upsetting was, one of these children was named Daniel, and died age 3. Then, 2 months later, the couple had another son, whom they named Daniel, again. This Daniel then died aged 2.

srmf5 · 05-09-2018 10:40pm

There are many tragic events when doing research and sadly my tree is riddled with them.

My great grandmother was one of 7 girls. However, I had only known of 3 sisters with one having died aged 19 of TB. The other two sisters had died as infants and the third when she was 6 from debility so it could have been from anything really.

I also only learned from research that my grandfather who I had thought was the eldest along with his twin had an older sister who lived for less than a day. I found out how my grandfather's brother died in a newspaper article.

My 2x great grandmother's sister lost all four of her children in one month ranging in ages from 2 to 10 from diphtheria. In the same month, she gave birth to twins who lived long lives and had three subsequent children. She fostered her nephew who had the same name as her second eldest whose own mother had died 13 days after giving birth to him.

I found records of my 4x great grandmother as a widow taking out poverty relief loans during the famine and eventually dying in the workhouse as a pauper aged 60 twenty years later. I came across articles in the newspaper that described the destruction of their land and homes by the moving bog leaving the place looking like an eviction scene causing a dispossessed widow to go mad, descriptions of land agents burning down or destroying houses so the evicted tenants couldn't move back in. Throughout all of that, there are the stories of neighbours helping each other out such as a stone mason in the local town coming to the area to rebuild a house with the help of others during the night for a widow that had been evicted and her house destroyed.

My great grandfather was the youngest of 10 and lost his mother and siblings to TB spanning 7 years and was only 7 when he lost his mother. He himself later died when my grandmother was 16 in an accident. I did find something lovely when researching him. In the 1901 census when he was a scholar, both he aged 13 and his father aged 66 could only read with my great grandfather's name spelt incorrectly. When I looked at the 1911 census, both he aged 23 and his father aged 76 wrote down that they could read and write. When I looked at the image of the census record, his father was able to sign as the head of the family in a shaky scrawl while in 1901 he could only leave his mark. I thought that it was lovely that he must have taught his father how to write even though his father had gotten that far in his life without needing to write. He must have just wanted to be able to write for himself and I find it lovely that his son must have taught him while attending school.

It's hard to imagine how some of these people kept going but it shows great resilience. I often find that doing family research really does put your own life into perspective. I suppose that all of the tragic events are balanced with the stories of family members doing well for themselves and the great sense of community that you get as well as admiration for those who faced so many struggles and managed to keep going despite it all. As others have said, I like the fact that I'm finding these people and by me knowing them, they're not forgotten. My 2x great grandfather's nephew died aged 38 and I found his memorial card that had written on it, "Gone, but not forgotten, Never shall thy memory fade, Sweetest thoughts shall ever linger, Around the grave where thou art laid."

p15574 · 06-09-2018 9:10am

I still remember my shock when researching a relative of my wife's in a rural townland of Donegal to see that they died of the measles. That wasn't the surprise - it was when I zoomed out of the death register and saw that on that page, and the surrounding pages of the register, about two thirds of the deaths, both children and young adults, measles was the cause.

It makes me angry to think of today's anti-vaxxers - they don't realise what they've got.

Wyldwood · 06-09-2018 9:24pm

One of the saddest stories I've uncovered in my research is my 2 x great-grandparents who lived in Killaloe and lost 6 of their 7 small children to famine fever. After the 6th died they moved to Westmeath where my great-grandmother was born in 1855 and thankfully survived or I wouldn't be here.

Jellybaby1 · 06-09-2018 9:30pm

What was famine fever? Starvation?

L1011 · 06-09-2018 9:31pm

Typhus I think.

Jellybaby1 · 06-09-2018 9:40pm

One of the twigs on my tree died from typhoid, that shocked me more than TB did. Never heard of typhus being called 'famine fever' before.

dennyk · 06-09-2018 11:26pm

Found a rather shocking tragedy in my own family's history. My great-great-great grandfather Thomas was born in Tipperary around 1820 or so and emigrated to the US a few years before the famine began and married a girl in Virginia. After making some money, he started sending for the rest of his family back in Ireland to join him. Both his sisters arrived safely and started new lives in the US, but when he at last sent for his mother and his brother, tragedy struck. Before departing for the US, they stopped at Liverpool and stayed the night with a friend in the city. However, their friend's wife was away from the house and their friend was left to manage the cooking himself. Being unfamiliar with the kitchen, when making biscuits for breakfast in the morning he confused the rat poison for baking powder, and Thomas's mother and brother as well as their host and his entire family "save one" died of poisoning.

(Unfortunately the family member who compiled this history didn't record the names of Thomas's parents or brother, only his two sisters, so I've had no luck so far tracking them down as of yet...)

Jellybaby1 · 06-09-2018 11:40pm

That's a shocking story. Biscuits for breakfast sounds quite an American thing. Only thing I can think of would be bread or scones. Amazing at that time for a man to be baking. I wonder if anyone can trace the story in the newspaper archives for this Liverpool tragedy. It would be good for you to have names at least.

dennyk · 07-09-2018 12:08am

Jellybaby1 wrote: »

That's a shocking story. Biscuits for breakfast sounds quite an American thing. Only thing I can think of would be bread or scones. Amazing at that time for a man to be baking. I wonder if anyone can trace the story in the newspaper archives for this Liverpool tragedy. It would be good for you to have names at least.

Probably meant scones or something similar, I'm sure; such things would be called "biscuits" by us heathen Americans ('cause we call biscuits "cookies" :pac: ). The story was told by one of Thomas's daughters to her grandson, who was compiling an extensive record of his family history and genealogy.

pedroeibar1 · 07-09-2018 12:16pm

Researching those who died and recording their existence is a form of paying respect; by ‘naming’ them genealogists complete a cultural ritual that is evident worldwide.
High mortality rates for infants, young children and women after childbirth were the norm in an era before the development of disease control (vaccination) and the advent of new drugs. We have to view our ancestors through the eyes of their eras – which means accepting high mortality rates as a norm and not as ‘shocking’. Even in the first decades of the 1800’s when on these islands the State began to become involved in welfare (PLU’s, Dispensary Districts, etc), understanding of disease, hygiene, etc., was minimal.
Mortality rates were linked to occupation, social class and the urban/rural divide. In 1842 Edwin Chadwick published his 'Report on the Sanitary Conditions of the Labouring Population of Great Britain' showing that life expectancy in the country was much higher than in the cities.

But epidemics like TB (phthisis),cholera, typhoid) and crises e.g. peritonitis (burst appendix) hit everyone. Rich as well as poor died from causes that today could be cured by a pill. For example, Lady Randolph Churchill, mother of Winston, in 1921 slipped when wearing new shoes and broke her ankle. Gangrene set in so her leg was amputated but medical difficulties persisted and she was dead with a fortnight. An antibiotic pill or cream, common two decades later, would have saved her life.

In England, smallpox vaccination was in use in the early 1700’s (long before Jenner who is credited with its ‘discovery’ in the late 1700’s). Supposedly it was first introduced to England by Lady Wortley Montagu in about 1720. She had encountered it in Turkey where her husband was ambassador. There were heavy pro and anti campaigns, one bishop stating that it was against the ‘will of God’ Caroline, Princess of Wales in 1722 had her children vaccinated but only after it was tried on six orphans and on six condemned criminals, who if they should survive be granted freedom. All patients survived and the condemned walked free.

Smallpox vaccination was made compulsory in the UK in 1853 and in Ireland in 1863 when it was linked to the registration of births. Parents and guardians were made responsible to ensure vaccination took place within six months of birth and were liable to be prosecuted if they could not prove compliance. See a record here

Jellybaby1 · 07-09-2018 6:59pm

That's a great record pedro. Are there similar books for other counties? Its interesting to read that vaccination was compulsory because in the 1950's my mother wouldn't sign the consent form for us to be vaccinated.

tabbey · 07-09-2018 10:25pm

Jellybaby1 wrote: »

Its interesting to read that vaccination was compulsory because in the 1950's my mother wouldn't sign the consent form for us to be vaccinated.

It was smallpox vaccination which was compulsory. We no longer vaccinate against it because it is considered a thing of the past. The WHO declared smallpox eradicated about 1975.

The immunisations of today are recommended but not compulsory unless you are travelling to an infective area.

pinkypinky · 07-09-2018 10:30pm

I once made the mistake of looking up smallpox online. Was not expecting colour photos of infected people from the 1970s! It was terrifying.

pedroeibar1 · 08-09-2018 12:20pm

Jellybaby1 wrote: »

That's a great record pedro. Are there similar books for other counties? Its interesting to read that vaccination was compulsory because in the 1950's my mother wouldn't sign the consent form for us to be vaccinated.

I don't know but I imagine there are, possibly off-line. I encountered it because I have Limerick connection and I saved the link although my family there predates the period covered.
.
My interest in vaccination is due to researching a couple of ancestors. One was a PLG who contracted ‘Famine Fever’ and died; another was an early practitioner of etiolation (an early version of vaccination) who published pamphlets on it in the 1700's. It was a real life-saver, only 2% of patients died as a result of treatment whereas death from smallpox accounted for 10% of all deaths. The treated patients died usually as a result of poor medical intervention that weakened them (purges and blood-letting prior to and post treatment).

Jellybaby1 wrote: »

One of the twigs on my tree died from typhoid, that shocked me more than TB did. Never heard of typhus being called 'famine fever' before.

‘Famine Fever’ is a catch-all description for several diseases. Its main diseases are Typhus, Typhoid and Relapsing Fever. Despite the similar names, Typhus and Typhoid are very different diseases. Causes common to all three are primarily economic, poor housing & sanitation, overcrowding and a poor and vastly changed diet.

Typhus is an insect-borne disease spread by fleas, ticks and lice. It is most rapidly spread by the latter via their faeces. Their bite itches, the person scratches and the organisms enters the bloodstream. The body’s tiny blood vessels particularly those of the brain and skin succumb to the attack so the face swells and the skin darkens, hence the Irish name of ‘Fiabhras Dubh’ (Black Fever).

Typhoid is a type of Salmonella and is a food/water borne disease. Dysentery caused by eating raw/badly prepared food coupled with poor sanitation causes it to spread through contamination of wells and drinking water.

Relapsing Fever is also related to Typhus and caused mainly by infection from body lice. After the main bout the patient ‘recovers’ but about a week later there is a relapse and this circle repeats until the patient dies from exhaustion. Jaundice is a side effect, hence the Irish name 'Fiabhras Buidhe' (Yellow Fever).

At the time of the Famine they were very difficult to separately identify/diagnose unless in their advanced stages, with the result that often they were lumped together and cause of death was described as plain ‘Famine Fever’.

pinkypinky · 08-09-2018 12:35pm

We've really veered off-topic here. If we want to continue famine diseases, please start a new thread and I'll move most of the posts here to it.

VirginiaB · 08-09-2018 2:32pm

I have also almost become numbed by the numbers of deaths I have encountered in this research. Families of seven children where none live long enough to produce even a single grandchild--and we are not talking about just the poor. I don't know how they bore such tragedy. No, they didn't get used to it.
I have also encountered several horrific deaths that made me walk away from the research for a few days, til I could absorb it. One was a sister of my great-great grandfather who jumped to her death from a cliff in Ireland. The info came out of the blue when I got her civil death record. I followed it up in newspapers and found the story which was later copied in US newspapers. Imagine reading that about your sister over your morning tea.

srmf5 · 08-09-2018 10:20pm

The causes of death don't really affect me too much since I never knew the people. It will make me momentarily sad but I don't cry or go into a state of grieving. I will continue to think of them now and again though. I suppose maybe it's because I was very much aware of these sorts of tragedies as a child that they've never really come as that much of a shock to me. Even learning about the famine and how families were wiped out, makes you aware that it likely affected your own family greatly at that time anyway.

I came across the cause of death for my mum's uncle in a newspaper article being attributed to strychnine poisoning. My mum had never been told by her parents how he had died since she was only 6 when it happened. My mum had come to the conclusion herself that he had done away with himself but his method did come as a shock. I didn't grieve or cry but it did leave me having sympathy for him and the family that he left behind. Unfortunately, the family didn't keep in touch with his side of the family. Mum tried to reconnect with his son and he did reply a few times and he said that he intended to meet up but he must have had a change of heart since there's no reply now. It may have brought back painful memories. She continues to message him now and again and send a Christmas card in the hope that he changes his mind some day. She really does care about her family and relatives and makes an effort to keep in touch with aunts and cousins.

Every family has had their own struggles and tragedies. There are so many tragedies occurring every day in the modern world, never mind the past. I'd be miserable if I let every sad story in the news affect me too much. Sometimes you have to be a bit detached to maintain your own sanity. The world doesn't stand still and you have to keep going and make the most of it.

DamoRed · 09-09-2018 2:49pm

Having seen so many deaths of children in various families, my feelings are pretty much the same as what I'd feel on hearing the same from friends of friends, but people I don't know directly. There is sympathy and sadness for the grieving family and reflection on our own lost loved ones, but emotions wouldn't usually become any greater than that. We as researchers get used to seeing death, as it's inevitable, but the distance of time and personal knowledge of those involved will lessen the effects.

In a cousin's family, his grandfather's older brother was the third boy born to that family to be called Patrick. Clearly, a strong determination to continue a patronomic line.

His grandfather had his own tragedy, too. Seeing a father's signature on the death cert of his 1/2 hour old baby sure puts a lump in the throat. Nothing unusual in a signature in most cases, as there's a column for the informant, but in this instance, the baby was the son of the Superintendent Registrar who signed off all the birth and death certs of everyone else's children!

My cousin hadn't known any of the deaths in either household or generation, so he was taken aback and took a few moments to gather his thoughts. Being a direct descendant obviously had more effect on him than for me in merely telling the story.

ticklebelly7 · 10-09-2018 11:04am

I discovered my great granny's sister, Nannie, who was in service. She had one illegitimate child in 1890 who died after a couple of days - feeble from birth, and then another illegitimate child born in 1900. This child showed up in the 1901 census living with Nannie and her two brothers. By 1911 Nannie and the brothers had all disappeared, but the young girl was now living with my great granny and her family.
I never found what happened to the brothers but I found the death cert for Nannie who succumbed to TB when she was in her early 30s. Great granny was the informant. And great granny took her orphaned child. Great granny had nothing, they were extremely poor, yet there was no thought of giving the child up to an orphanage or a church run institution. The child was their blood and that was that. Great granny also went on to rear her own daughter's illegitimate child who was also loved and welcomed into the home; my mother remembered her well and she went on to make a great marriage with a youngfella who had a shop!
Nannie's girl grew up alongside my grandfather and his sisters, and thrived and went to school in the village. At the age of 14, coming home from school up the big hill out of town, she got a lift on the back of a threshing machine with her aunt's husband. Near the top of the hill she fell from the machine, fractured her skull and died a couple of days later with my great granny beside her.
She was so well-loved, that child. The extended family put up a wayside cross for her and it's still there 104 years later. I'm glad I found out the story of that one child. Hearing of how others were put into institutions for the sin of being illegitimate, and shunned and beaten and excoriated by both the religious orders and their own relatives and neighbours, it does my heart good to find that great granny did the right thing.

cobham · 10-09-2018 4:16pm

Just reading about the family that died of poisoning in Liverpool.... those deaths should be findable on the UK BMD index for which records started in 1835. There was probably an inquest and perhaps a newspaper account if you could finetune a date.

The emotions of learning about tragic cases

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