Powers & Irish Times Short Story Comp

Whelpling wrote: »

Congrats Kieslowski!

Good luck for the win! Let us know how you get on

Will do. When one of the other stories is announced as the winner I will be straight on here lambasting the judges!

Congrats to the shortlisters.

Had a re-read of my story - saccharin rubbish! I remember it being better while I was writing it, and only realise how much of the feel of the story I lost while I was cutting it down to 450 words. I now physically cringe at some of the awkward phrasing - especially that first line!

Anyways, since I wasn't shortlisted or longlisted - and I don't really care about appearing in Powers promotional material, here's my story in all its glory!

(I was really hoping someone else would have posted their own losing entry first!)

_____ooooOO Story Start OOoooo_____

Gerry impatiently bounded from the door of the bus and made a dash towards work.

"About 15 minutes and I'm late!" he thought, glancing at his watch as he pushed through the thronging crowds.

He turned onto Grafton Street. Instead of the familiar sight of red paving stones stretching out in front of him he was faced by a dark, undulating sea of people's heads.

He didn't have time to hesitate or think about alternative routes. He took a deep breath and plunged forward - he wouldn't be late and the masses would just have to part for him.

These were unfamiliar waters, however. It seemed like Dublin was awash with people from all the nations of mankind, including rugby-enthused Italians clinging to hope, starry-eyed Americans seeking confirmation of their ancestral ambitions and English revellers just looking for fun and entertainment. Try as he might, Gerry couldn't gain an advantage against this current of humanity and he was reduced to a frustratingly slow tourists' pace.

The lilting music of buskers rose and fell as he moved by them, dredging up long forgotten memories. The fiddle music that reminded him of an open fire and, strangely, Christmas dinners. Outdated Californian pop music that reminded him of high-Summer in the late nineties. The blues trio that reminded him of late-night discussions with his father over a glass of Powers, interrupted only by the click of the record player and the inevitable argument about what to play next.

Suddenly, a gap appeared! A school of Spanish students had broken away leaving a clear path ahead. Gerry began to accelerate, his heart racing.

As the cacophony of noise, still dominated by the blues trio, began to fade, his mind drifted back to work and the weekly pre-'scheduling meeting' meeting which he was rushing towards.

"I can make it... I can..." Gerry's thoughts trailed off and, without warning, he stopped.

A ripple of clucks and tuts emanated from impeded tourists.

"Why are all my fond memories so... so old?" he wondered

He briefly thought about the last decade, filled with spreadsheets and career moves and networking.... but nothing compared to his yellowed and faded memories of family, of enjoyment, of things done.... differently.

He smiled as he wondered if he and his father were discussing blues legends today, how long would it be before one or the other of them resorted to fact checking on the internet. If you excluded post-turkey small talk at Christmas, he hadn't really spoken to his Dad in about five years.

Gerry turned and, walking slowly back towards the blues trio, took out his phone.

"Dad? I have the day off work. Do you still have the record player?"

Psicic, well done for posting your story. I really enjoyed reading it. Its my kind of story anyway because its a tale. I wanted to know from the start what was gona happen next... and at the end! Only thing is, to me, the character seems like he might have a life somewhere else , like in a longer story, with a past and a future and that the story is 'a day in the life of.....' I like that myself.
But i guess you have to look at what is standard procedure in a short story.
It seems that the successful short story has to fit in a box ie somewhat standardised, and i read that a short story should not have the air of an excerpt. But I dunno i guess!

Please continue with it. Very nice pace too. You can do it!

The stories that stick out for me from the shortlist are Chips, the Train back and Aprez Match.

Chips is a good laugh, and “Uncle” figures appearing in children’s’ lives and trying to impress them is definitely a theme that many of us can relate to.

The Train Back is one of the only stories to have a surprise in it and I like short stories that involve passing exchanges between strangers like this for some reason, life is made up of so many of them. I also have a blind grandmother and can remember similar incidents growing up.

Same with Aprez Match, some posters have said that Verbose is the only story that stays close to the theme but this captures it really well I think. I sat in my car eating a burger king with my son about three months ago during a long journey and got the lovely feeling the writer is telling us about here. Interesting that the writer is female but the two character are male, is she writing from personal experience and just changed the sex for the story, or writing about her son, father, brother…either way, probably the story I enjoyed the most.

I didn’t make the long list or the shortlist and definitely tried to follow the “feel good” route of last year’s winner, obviously to the cheesy point of no return, as well as committing the apparent mortal sin of mentioning Powers (Although less so than my effort in post no. 27 of this thread). Sorry now I wasn’t brave enough to add more humour or darkness to the story somehow.
I’ll post it here at the weekend when the full competition is over, may as well make the Boards list

That is what really matters. Sticking to the theme!

I shall post mine later. My money is on Aprez match to win. I would be ok about that.

Lilly Prehistoric Tin wrote: »

Maybe next year set clearer parameters, stick to them, and publish a shorter but higher quality longlist that will really showcase Irish writers who are taking a few risks and trying new things and bringing Irish writing on to a new phase.

I would agree. I honestly don't think the judges, any more than the participants, really knew what it was they were looking for. They just hoped they would know it when they saw it.

Maybe it is just me but I'd find it pretty hard to bring Irish writing onto a new phase in 450 words.

DermoLogical wrote: »

For anyone on the long list, but not on the shortlist, you can keep biting your nails for another few months:

According to the Powers page of Facebook, "the 50 won’t be released until the book is published" in the Autumn.

Bad form that it wasn't made more clear on the Irish Times website, but at least it gives hope that they will actually read them all and pick the best.
I'm not on the longlst so at least the heartache is over for me

By the way, the Long list is back up on the site

http://www.irishtimes.com/blogs/powers-short-story-competition/

Shameless plug. More competitions

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> here

Yeah, flash fic tends to be more like prose poetry, with less of the general 'rules' for short stories being applicable.

I guess I'd have heard by now if I'd won this...ah well nice to be shortlisted anyway.

http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/magazine/2012/0526/1224316639540.html

Well done to her!

I'm very happy she won, a few of those finalists should have won something too. Excellent.

Well done to her.

Claymore wrote: »

Don't mean to be overly critical but for me it is quite a cloying, hackneyed story.

Sounds more like begrudery than being overly critical.
It wasn't my favourite and I thought it could have done without the last line (wait for the rush of people saying that was the best part!) but still feel it is a deserving winner.

Sorry you didn't pocket the cash kieslowski, but there is always next year and you can have a go at some of the other competitions listed. One of them closes on May 31st so it is time to get working.

I think she knew how to tailor a story for the competion which eluded the rest of us. I think she did a great job in picking that style of writing. You can tell that she can do much better than that if the occasion requires it and Im really happy for her cos she has done the hard work preparing for it and seems like a really nice girl with a great smile like the father character in her story.I hope to see her really shine in other more literary competitions. If you check out the winner of the Arena competition on rte, the winner has written with the same style. Personally I wouldnt part with a cent to listen to the Arena winning story again.The 'powers' winning story is beautiful comparing to that one. Theres the thing - how does all this relate to the world of commerce/bread and butter? Or is it world in a vacuum where Creative writing tutors judge these comps and so set the style du jour that is sort of navel gazing or underwhelming to me anyway. Where did the William Trevor short story go?I loved Ms Galvins story although, im ashamed to say i only went beyond the first paragraph, after it won - but the Arena winning story worries me. If thats what its coming to, I think Ill hang up my pencil.