What are your funniest Irish sayings?

I have a bar in me pants that would bate a donkey out of a quarry.


and I STILL can't think of any funny Irishisms.

Once said of unscrupulous money lenders: "He'd lend his arse and **** through his ribs"

Really hungry: "I'd ate an apple through a letterbox"

I reject the premise of the question: "Ask me bollix!"

My own personal favourite: "Go n-ithe an cat thu/ is go n-ithe an diabhal an cat" (May the cat ate you, and may the divil ate the cat!)


And yes it's ate not eat

That fella has no idea what he's at, he might as well be looking into a field of thistles.

Some head on ya for batin in back doors.

I'll be with you now in a minute...

Couple of my favs
When i'm hungry - "I could ate the balls off a low flying crow"

When I'm asked to assist someone with something I've no knowledge of - "I may as well be looking up a cows ar$e"

...and one(s) I've heard

When greeted with "Whats the craic? - either "The end with the lips that dont move as much" or the more crass "The best part of a woman" *runs for cover*

Another hungry one:

"I'd eat the arse off a low flying duck"

You'd say this about a miser or a tight bloke:

"Here's short arms, long pockets"

You've a face like a pig licking piss off a nettle.

May you be half an hour is heaven before the devil knows you're dead!

Also, Hows she cuttin?

She's as flahual (flathulach) with her money.

**** libh

" I'm in the height of it "

"There's a wind out there that'd blow a knacker off his sister....."

winston82 wrote: »

Thread should be renamed to "unfunny spud gobbler quotes that you'd never hear in Dublin"

with remarks like that you'd swear dublin doesnt even want to be the 33rd county