LETS ALL LAUGH AT PEOPLE WITH DEPRESSION!!

Drumpot · 13-12-2011 6:09pm

This is a superb post and with a bit of humour has helped bring depression to the attention of a larger audience without it being too taboo.

I have suffered since my mid teens and now in my mid thirties. My only goal in life was to have a family of my own , which I have thankfully achieved. Yes, a very modest goal/dream, but none the less something that people can take for granted.

In my earlier years I used to feel numb. The only feelings I felt were of pain, suffering, the kind of stuff that Yoda said about those who follow the dark side would feel.

I always thought there was something wrong with me, but didnt think that anybody could help. Partially because of my insecurity (I loved everybody liking me, I was the joker of my group) and partially because I didnt think anybody would care. There was and always is an element of fear with me that friends/family will not want to be around me if I talk to much about it.

I reckon what has helped me over the years has been -

Wanting to feel better
Exploring differant ways - Excercise, education, talking etc
Learning to understand myself better - triggers,
Giving myself a break - I still tend to beat myself up if I dont meet certain goals that I set myself, including trivial things that arent important
giving myself a mental high 5 or pat on the back when I achieve even basic tasks - I am trying to be more positive, by putting more emphasis on positive feedback to myself as opposed to negative feedback
try to be more constructive in my self criticism - I didnt get up this morning, dont worry about it, I will get more rest and goto gym, afterwhich I will get more productive work done in less time (rather then have my hands in my head for twice the time and get nothing done!).
I will talk more to my partner and family to let them know how I feel. How can they help or understand if I dont say how I feel. It doesnt matter if they dont understand, only that they know that I dont feel right. Sometimes I feel like a broken record, but my wife prefers to listen to me speak some of the time, as opposed to when I just shut down and cant speak for days!
Understanding my issues with drink. I have some bad habits (used to be worse when I was younger) that I am still trying to iron out. I see the connection between my moods and drink. Spotting this is only half the battle, but I am at least getting there.
Trying to come to terms with the fact that I cannot control things outside of my own life. I get extremely upset with the hypocrisy and downright corruption that exists in western civilistion. Particularly when its excused as "part and parcel of life" as if this makes immoral/unethical acts exceptable. EG - Politicians breaking pre election promises, laws that protect the rich corporations against small people ( I have personal reason to be particularly upset on this one!) etc.

I was called a lazy bum, useless and all sorts of other things when I was younger by friends and family who thought a kick up the jollies would somehow motivate me to become the person they knew I could be.

Not everybodys depression is same and people do suffer on differant levels. I have a friend who suffers serious bouts and some days he cant even leave his house. Other days he can get up and speak on front of hundreds of people , extremely confidently and challenge educated people on certain issues, with no bother on him.

I tend to just go into myself, look to stay at home as much as possible , like a hermit. I used to feel sorry for myself, but now I just feel like I want to get better. I used to think money (financial troubles) would solve my problems, but I now know it wont. I achieved the one thing I have always wanted in life (my own family) and while it has given me strength it hasnt sorted me out completely.

Somedays I wake up feeling nervous and sick for no particular reason. What is worse is when you dont even know why you feel this way. I generally feel most peaceful in the wee hours of the AM. One morning I walked with my dogs to the beach to watch the sunrise, it was a true Karma moment.

I personally judge my life on the family I am bringing up and the friends I have around me. These are how I judge my successes. I never put an importance on educational achievements or work achievements because they do not define the person I am. I would class myself of average intelligence (wouldnt throw that out to the floor at a pokergame with my friends).

Depression is in no way a funny thing to live with, but if comedy could be used to educate people, I would be all for it. I used to be much funnier and wittier, but cant think of anything remotely interesting to write.

bubbuz · 13-12-2011 6:15pm

DeVore wrote: »

Thank you to everyone here. I wasnt bad yesterday or last week or anything, but I'm even better now. I was kinda teary yesterday because I watched my site do what I designed it to do after 12 years of careful paternal tending. Thanks.

Tom.

Hi Tom, its you that needs thanking, yesterday I found boards and then your thread, I was rock bottom and thanks to your thread, today I don't feel so alone and I feel brighter. The world would be a better place with more people like you in it. THANK YOU Tom

Susie_Q · 13-12-2011 6:27pm

I have a question, if I may.

I have no personal experience of depression, and quite frankly don't understand it at all. My OH's brother has depression and possible other mental problems and I'd love to say I understand him but I don't. This is a problem for me and perhaps someone can shed some light.

The brother is nearly 30, lives at home with his mother and pretty much bullies his pensioner mother by throwing paint around the house, demanding cigarettes, destroying newly-decorated rooms etc. Most days he doesn't get out of bed, sometimes you won't see him for a week. He is on medication but only takes it when he wants. Sometimes when I've been visited he has stayed in the bath in the only bathroom for 7 hours - I've actually had to pee in the garden because he won't get out of the bathroom. It's ridiculous. I feel so mortified for his mother.

I have been super nice to the brother but it's always been thrown back in my face. I cooked him dinner once and was later told he threw a tantrum after I left because it wasn't to his taste. I felt like telling him to f off and cook his own dinners.... I had spent a lot of money cooking for him!

I suppose my question is how do I deal with this? I don't go to my OH's mother's house much now because he is always there. This is not fair on the mother as she is lovely and genuinely needs the extra company. I'm also concerned about what happens when we get married in a few years... I have a big and stable family and don't want this guy ruining things because he's not getting enough attention or he's in a sulk. I would seriously consider not inviting him as I would worry about him causing a scene and wrecking the day. As I said, he has been diagnosed with depression but also the generic 'other mental problems'. With no experience myself I would love some advice.

nesf · 13-12-2011 6:32pm

DeVore wrote: »

I've started editing in the links to the online resources in the OP. If anyone has any others, please post them here and I'll swing by a few times a day and update it.

I'm fairly used to the size of boards and its power but even I've been pretty much blown away by the response here. I had thought "Hey, I'll go talk to AH, thats always fun" but this grew legs and ran. I'm secretly very chuffed I have to admit.
Thank you to everyone here. I wasnt bad yesterday or last week or anything, but I'm even better now. I was kinda teary yesterday because I watched my site do what I designed it to do after 12 years of careful paternal tending. Thanks.

Tom.

I'd add book recommendations too and the advice about meditation and exercise in this thread.

Linkies:

Royal College of Psychiatrist: Readable info on all mental health topics aimed at patients and caregivers.

Psychology Today on Mindfulness: Readable and essential non-medication treatment ideas. All stuff that can improve your life with no side effects. Does not negate the need for meds in many cases but it can improve your quality of life.

NIMH booklets on mental health topics: Good reading. Again aimed at patients.

Mars Bar · 13-12-2011 6:36pm

stephen_k wrote: »

Side Effect 2: Crazy Ass Dreams: The most vividly real dreams you can possible imagine, and waking up in a pool (and I mean a pool) of sweat. Best drug induced dream I had was when I dreamt Jonah Lomu called to the door of the house selling Kingsmill Bread door to door, I went back inside to the house to tell my Dad... "You'll never guess who was at the door.... Only Jonah Lomu".... "Oh was he trying to sell that fúcking Kingsmill bread again"....

If I could figure out what the hell some of my dreams meant, I'm fairly certain I could have a couple of blockbuster sci-fi movies in the pipeline.

Flying attacking monkeys my family and I fought off with Wii controllers and being able to escape them using Spidyweb! That was a really fast paced dream that it actually had me exhausted when I woke up.

Another one that I remember was some jungle with a hidden animal lab and myself and some others tried to save the animals. But these weren't normal animals, they were like mutant animals or something. I snuck in to this lab and became a spy and sent signals to the outside. It was mad...can't actually remember what happened at the end though.

They were just so feckin' vivd. I felt like I was still in them when I was awake!

gcgirl · 13-12-2011 6:47pm

djk1000 wrote: »

Seems to be a lot of people here with no one to talk to, if anyone wants to go for a pint/coffee and a chat with someone that has been dealing with depression for a while, or if you just want to talk about the weather or the rugby, just PM me.

I've also been reading a bit about meditation as a tool to manage depression, worth a look, it seems to have a decent scientific basis. Probably not useful while you are in a bad place, but once that passes, this could be useful to keep the downward cycle at bay. Linky I'd be interested to hear from anyone that has tried something similar.

D.

That's what I have been doing and so far it seems to be working, nearly a yr at it and I've read a few books by Jon Kabit Zinn and Mark Williams about mindfull meditation, went to the local mindfulness group done a personal development course and met a few other people who are in the same boat as myself, some days I get a lil bit down but I just try to stay in the moment, don't think about the past or fret about the future and get on with things, I'm pretty fortunate to have 3 amazing lil people who drive me on and I'm in a happier place

saa · 13-12-2011 6:55pm

Susie_Q wrote: »

I have a question, if I may.

I have no personal experience of depression, and quite frankly don't understand it at all. My OH's brother has depression and possible other mental problems and I'd love to say I understand him but I don't. This is a problem for me and perhaps someone can shed some light.

The brother is nearly 30, lives at home with his mother and pretty much bullies his pensioner mother by throwing paint around the house, demanding cigarettes, destroying newly-decorated rooms etc. Most days he doesn't get out of bed, sometimes you won't see him for a week. He is on medication but only takes it when he wants. Sometimes when I've been visited he has stayed in the bath in the only bathroom for 7 hours - I've actually had to pee in the garden because he won't get out of the bathroom. It's ridiculous. I feel so mortified for his mother.

I have been super nice to the brother but it's always been thrown back in my face. I cooked him dinner once and was later told he threw a tantrum after I left because it wasn't to his taste. I felt like telling him to f off and cook his own dinners.... I had spent a lot of money cooking for him!

I suppose my question is how do I deal with this? I don't go to my OH's mother's house much now because he is always there. This is not fair on the mother as she is lovely and genuinely needs the extra company. I'm also concerned about what happens when we get married in a few years... I have a big and stable family and don't want this guy ruining things because he's not getting enough attention or he's in a sulk. I would seriously consider not inviting him as I would worry about him causing a scene and wrecking the day. As I said, he has been diagnosed with depression but also the generic 'other mental problems'. With no experience myself I would love some advice.

I am just running out the door but I have a family member with destructive tendencies, for some people its about learning how to talk to the person instead of being horrified and avoiding them but some people cannot be talked to if they are having an episode it sounds like some barriers need to be put up within the home as it sounds like its getting out of hand, you will just need to make arrangements before hand so some people are aware he may become agitated and can be removed from an event he should not be excluded because he is ill but it sounds like more ways to manage the situation for your mother would be good but its up to him to manage his own illness, I would definitely think the threat of being kicked out should be discussed if he is able capable of reasoning depends on the extent of the illness or more rules there will be a point where he can't control anger but maybe if he had another way of expressing it it wouldnt boil down to throwing paint, atleast he isn't hitting like my family member, just please don't hate them or take it personally sorry this is all rambly but I hope its a start.

Feeona · 13-12-2011 6:56pm

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Little-Book-Crap-Neil-Manson/dp/0752218247

Just like the Little Book of Calm, this book is full of useless tips which probably won't help, but unlike the Little Book of Calm, it'll hopefully put a smile on your face.

Take care one and all.

achtungbarry · 13-12-2011 6:58pm

Great thread Dev. It is great to see mental health issues being talked about here. Far too many people (especially men) are afraid to admit that all is not well and maybe they need help. They reality is that we all need a little help at some point or another, some of us more than others. The stigma attatched to mental helth problems has to be consigned to the dustbin. If you break your leg, you get it treated. The same is true if, you your mental health is not where it should be.

I don't suffer from depression but I do suffer from GAD (general anxiety disorder) and OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). Like most men, I tried to ignore it and of course that means that it only got worse and worse. Finally, about 5 weeks ago, with the help of my incredible wife, I finally admitted to myself that all was not well and that it was time to seek help. Five weeks later and I am attending regular therapy sessions and have been prescribed some medication to help for a while until I deal with roots of my issues and learn how to deal with my anxiety and OCD. After only 5 weeks, I feel an enormous difference. I am not there yet, there is still lots of work to do but I am on a very different road than just over a month ago. I have begun to learn how to relax and enjoy life rather than being in a constant state of worry. The OCD is a lot less frequent too.

I am lucky to have great support from my wife and family in general. The few close friends I've confided in have been fantastically supportive too. In fact one realised he was going through something similar and is now also getting help as a result of our chat. It shows that, mental health issues are more prevalent than most of would realise. You will also be amazed at just how supportive those around you will be.

Don't ever be afraid to talk to someone. You'll be glad you did and the burden feels a little lighter. Speak to a family member, a friend, your GP or a therapist. Talking to people and seeking help was one of the best decisions I ever made. If you feel like you might be suffering from depression or anxiety or any other mental health issue, don't be afraid to get help.

Personally I have found 'The Stress Reduction and Relaxation Workbook' to be very helpful. It is full of exercises and techniques to deal with stress and anxiety. I have also found Jon Cabot Zinn's books and cds on mindfulness meditation to be a great help.

In conclusion, if you know that something is not right, talk to someone and get help. There is plenty of it out there.

Barry

PrincessLola · 13-12-2011 7:13pm

cloud493 wrote: »

I kinda agree with the post someone made last night was it? Some people use depression for a reason to be standoffish. I mean, I know its hard. Jesus I do. When you have it, you don't really feel like being nice to every that comes into your path, thats fine. When you see people being dicks, and they say 'its not my fault, im depressed lol' as I have seen, that annoys me. I mean, I used to try to be nicer, and participate and stuff, so no one would guess. Just grinds my gears, to see people making light of it.

Maybe they're feeling very low, I'm sure you're aware that when depressed people feel at their worst it can be an emotional efort to even make eye contact with another person. It could be that they feel strong self-loathing and think you'd be better off if they didn't talk to them.

When I was a teenager I honestly felt people were better off if I made myself invisable and didn't interact with them. As a result people thought I was stuck-up, so it didn't exactly help.

cloud493 · 13-12-2011 7:22pm

That how I mean. I get it like. But when people say it so flippantly, 'lol im depressed' or 'omg im emo' it annoys me.

Drumpot · 13-12-2011 7:24pm

Somebody mentioned something about dreams, well the dreams I have are completely nuts. Cant remember any of them now but I have woken up feeling extremely uncomfortable many a time. ..

Ive also had many a panic attack that are not nice. The first time you have one you think "thats it, I am f**ked" and while it can get easier after a few of them, the fright during seldom reduces. I had one for the first time in ages a couple of weeks ago.

For me its like when you are conscious but paralysed, unable to open your eyes or move. Your heart is going nuts (you think its a heartattack!), sometimesy you feel a presence in the room, but its just you scaring the crap out of yourself. You are better off just trying to go back asleep as when you relax it usually stops.

Onetime I was having a knightmare and I woke up in the middle of punching my wifes pillow, not sure what that was about but thank god she was sleeping on the edge of the bed. For anybody who saw wolverine origins, it was like when he wakes up in the bed beside your one and he slashes his claws into her side of the bed. Except I dont have steel claws so it would of just been a giant bruiser for the misses.

Drumpot · 13-12-2011 7:29pm

cloud493 wrote: »

That how I mean. I get it like. But when people say it so flippantly, 'lol im depressed' or 'omg im emo' it annoys me.

I used to think LOL was laugh on laugh . . Didnt know what that was supposed to mean and didnt bother googling its meaning, just accepted that it was one of those things that doesnt make sense. Until my wife put me straight . . She Lol'd after explaining its meaning . . The irony

What does emo mean ? (before I just presume it means something like evil midget owls or something stupid like that!

Im just not that hip!

vtec_vixen · 13-12-2011 7:30pm

Really Struck a cord with me as I have suffered with Depression since my early teens, Docters even suspected I was Bi-Polar at one stage.
Main problem was I was crying out for help but couldn't actually grow a pair and straight out say it.
I have been to couselling which I was death against to begin with i.e. ''They aren't going to understand, they don't get how I feel'', ''She's a total stranger, fcuk that''...

Without going into the nitty gritty there was a lot of pretty bad stuff going on in my life in my early teens, Abuse & my parents breaking up etc...
And through all of it I felt very alone.

The counselling has helped immensely and I have decided against taking Medication (Did for a year and a half and intermittently after that) as I don't want to feel like I have to take pills to cope, I would rather try to cope by myself, so the fear of spiralling backwards when coming off meds wouldn't be a reality.

Its a long and hard road and I don't know if Ill ever be fully free, some of my past experiences have left me with quite a lot of healing to do, but Im doing great now, and I know I'll be okay in the end.

Im rambling now but long in short kudos to you DeV great piece,

and to all the people like me out there, keep on fighting guys.

You most certainly aren't alone... Take solace in that

flutterflye · 13-12-2011 7:32pm

Drumpot wrote: »

I used to think LOL was laugh on laugh . . Didnt know what that was supposed to mean and didnt bother googling its meaning, just accepted that it was one of those things that doesnt make sense. Until my wife put me straight . . She Lol'd after explaining its meaning . . The irony

What does emo mean ? (before I just presume it means something like evil midget owls or something stupid like that!

Im just not that hip!

Alot of older women seem to think it means "Lots of love"!
I'm forever seeing facebook comments from older relatives like "Happy Birthday. LOL x" or "Hope you feel better soon LOL"!

cloud493 · 13-12-2011 7:36pm

Drumpot wrote: »

I used to think LOL was laugh on laugh . . Didnt know what that was supposed to mean and didnt bother googling its meaning, just accepted that it was one of those things that doesnt make sense. Until my wife put me straight . . She Lol'd after explaining its meaning . . The irony

What does emo mean ? (before I just presume it means something like evil midget owls or something stupid like that!

Im just not that hip!

Emo is teen slang for someone who is 'sad' and cuts themselves.

DeVore · 13-12-2011 7:37pm

Susie_Q wrote: »

I have a question, if I may.

I have no personal experience of depression, and quite frankly don't understand it at all. My OH's brother has depression and possible other mental problems and I'd love to say I understand him but I don't. This is a problem for me and perhaps someone can shed some light.

The brother is nearly 30, lives at home with his mother and pretty much bullies his pensioner mother by throwing paint around the house, demanding cigarettes, destroying newly-decorated rooms etc. Most days he doesn't get out of bed, sometimes you won't see him for a week. He is on medication but only takes it when he wants. Sometimes when I've been visited he has stayed in the bath in the only bathroom for 7 hours - I've actually had to pee in the garden because he won't get out of the bathroom. It's ridiculous. I feel so mortified for his mother.

I have been super nice to the brother but it's always been thrown back in my face. I cooked him dinner once and was later told he threw a tantrum after I left because it wasn't to his taste. I felt like telling him to f off and cook his own dinners.... I had spent a lot of money cooking for him!

I suppose my question is how do I deal with this? I don't go to my OH's mother's house much now because he is always there. This is not fair on the mother as she is lovely and genuinely needs the extra company. I'm also concerned about what happens when we get married in a few years... I have a big and stable family and don't want this guy ruining things because he's not getting enough attention or he's in a sulk. I would seriously consider not inviting him as I would worry about him causing a scene and wrecking the day. As I said, he has been diagnosed with depression but also the generic 'other mental problems'. With no experience myself I would love some advice.

This is the hard thing, there isnt a good way to deal with this situation. My advice... talk to a trained professional (which I'm sure you have).

My personal decision would be to confront this sort of behaviour. Your mother is a person too and deserves a reasonable life. Youre brother is doing what I call "wallowing". Its kinda "fun" when you are badly depressed, rather than fight my way to the surface like I know I should, I just wallow in it all and act like a dick. I live alone so I'm not hurting anyone (but myself!). It sounds like he's doing the same and also acting like a bit of a spoiled brat (which can be the depression, but also could be that he's a spoiled brat

). Either way, he needs to be brought "to the surface" imho. To get past depression I have to force myself to reengage with society.

But I'm scared to give you advice because I dont know. A professional will know better. But the situation as is, isnt good for you or your mum and despite what your brother thinks, its not good for him either.

DeV.

Kooli · 13-12-2011 7:40pm

A great cartoon about depression:

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2011/10/adventures-in-depression.html

cloud493 · 13-12-2011 7:54pm

That cartoon is so brilliant

13-12-2011 7:57pm

Guess I should somewhat highlight my own story, which I don't think I've ever done fully here. Beware though, because it is a long post.

A few years ago, I went through an unbelievably terrible time, which I won't go into in depth now, because it just doesn't matter anymore as it's all in the past. It felt like everything, from making my bed, to showering, to eating, to simply leaving my room, was a chore. Everyday felt worse than the day that preceded and I felt like the following day would be just as bad, if not worse.

Sometimes I'd get into a way where nothing made sense - somewhat like the example that DeV gave with the cup of coffee, there'd be times where I'd have a mild freak-out over something with somebody and when it was over, it was like I couldn't remember it, or like it had happened to somebody else that wasn't me. It's tough to explain and probably makes no sense.

Eventually I decided enough was enough and then I approached a counselor that was in my college, took up yoga and meditation, started to exercise more. Slowly and slowly I started to feel better, but this was a gradual process over maybe two years, rather than an instant thing.

During this time, I was in college, working double shifts on Saturdays and Sundays and even took up an internship on Thursdays and Fridays. At the end of my 3rd year I received a 2.1, 2% off a first, in my ordinary degree.

When 4th year came along, I realized I just couldn't work anymore and quit my job to concentrate on college. However, things were slowly beginning to get worse again, as the different factors from previously contributed with the stress of college culminated in one horrendously bad night, which sent me to the doctors the next morning to get a prescription for anti-anxiety tablets, as I suffered more from anxiety than depression, which would then spiral on to a depression and just get worse and worse. I eventually finished 4th year, graduating with a 2.1 (slightly lower score than previous, but I'm very proud of what I got).

Once college finished in May, I went to apply for the dole, which I have been on since June. I realized that while I was in college and working, I was just pushing the issues I had aside. So I spent the time I had now to work on myself, I started socializing a lot more, meeting more people, trying to force myself over the social anxiety I had developed during my darkest times. These would include not even willing to approach shop assistants to ask questions, because I felt like I just didn't deserve it. It sounds so ridiculous now, looking back, but it made sense at the time.

I know a lot of people are anti-dole, but I have to say that going on it was by far one of the best ideas I have ever had, because I have now come out of something that started possibly 4 years ago now.

Additional anecdote -
When I returned to college in 4th year and had a check-up with my counselor, she was amazed at the progress I had made over the summer, that I was a completely different person to the one I was the first time we met. She informed me that I was one of the only people that recognized what had made them sad and actually changed it.

Which is the important thing -
There is no point in just sitting down and being gloomy. Try and analyze your life and figure out what is getting you down. If it is something that is changeable, then do it. The only way things are going to get better and actually improve is if you do something about it. Even if it's something as small as talking to a sibling, a loved one, a work colleague or even a friend. Whoever it may be, you'd be amazed with how much it can help.

foxinsox · 13-12-2011 7:59pm

Jaysus, that cartoon is brilliant and is a great way to describe the feelings..

I was crying and laughing at the same time

CLOL ing ?

I've saved that to my favourites..

I think it might be a good way of explaining to someone how depression makes you feel sometimes. You could just show them the cartoon.

cloud493 · 13-12-2011 8:04pm

God I was half laughing, half emphasizing with that cartoon. Bloody brilliant. After what happened to me, certainly with my dad, more so after leaving the hospital, It just feels like... constant sadness. I hate calling it depression, I never do. I tried to distract myself with anything, I got a job, I started going out to parties, I tried swimming. And I just felt nothing the whole time, a whole day, nothing. It was constant sadness, like constant pain. And the only thing that mattered, that made me feel anything, was coming back, and.. injuring myself.

Jimoslimos · 13-12-2011 8:04pm

Question: Would introverted or extroverted people be more susceptible to depression?

Thankfully I have never suffered depression or indeed any other mental ilness (touch wood). I only ask, because as a rather introverted individual my behaviours have sometimes been mistaken by people for depression (and once even by my mother, a psychiatric nurse:eek:) - I'd often spend most of the day in bed getting up after noon, my room is a complete mess and I can be a bit unsociable. All things I put down to being lazy and a grumpy sod!

But most (not all) of the cases I know occur in quite extroverted characters. Also appears to be especially common in the media & showbusiness (comedians are notorious for suffering depression).

Personally I don't think either introvertism/extrovertism have a correlation with depression - just we notice changes in an extroverts behaviour more readily than others.

bubbuz · 13-12-2011 8:07pm

Kooli wrote: »

A great cartoon about depression:

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2011/10/adventures-in-depression.html

Fantastic, Thanks

foxinsox · 13-12-2011 8:13pm

Jimoslimos wrote: »

Question: Would introverted or extroverted people be more susceptible to depression?

I would say that anybody/everybody is susceptible to depression...

Maybe more introverted people just avoid people more and hide their feelings more, maybe are kind of shy about discussing it.

I would be quite extroverted, but to be honest with you, if you met me, you would never ever think that I get depressed.

I would chat away to anyone and have no qualms with having depression (well of course I hate it and would love not to have it :rolleyes:) But I choose who I discuss it with carefully, as mentioned lots of times, not everyone understands or wants/needs to know.

I think maybe we know of extoverted celebs, only because their "illness" is usually reported with the shock horror tabloid type reporting.

I don't really know if this answers your question, but I don't think depression is picky when choosing its' victims.

Logical Fallacy · 13-12-2011 8:13pm

Jimoslimos wrote: »

Question: Would introverted or extroverted people be more susceptible to depression?

Thankfully I have never suffered depression or indeed any other mental ilness (touch wood). I only ask, because as a rather introverted individual my behaviours have sometimes been mistaken by people for depression (and once even by my mother, a psychiatric nurse:eek:) - I'd often spend most of the day in bed getting up after noon, my room is a complete mess and I can be a bit unsociable. All things I put down to being lazy and a grumpy sod!

But most (not all) of the cases I know occur in quite extroverted characters. Also appears to be especially common in the media & showbusiness (comedians are notorious for suffering depression).

Personally I don't think either introvertism/extrovertism have a correlation with depression - just we notice changes in an extroverts behaviour more readily than others.

I think a lot of it is that people who suffer from depression might work harder at being outgoing and extroverted because it can help to hide the issue. For a lot of people it takes some time to tell people they might be dealing with depression.

GrumPy · 13-12-2011 8:23pm

Some day, I hope to publish a post that beautiful......

I'll just wallow here in this pit of depression till then.

:pac:

foxinsox · 13-12-2011 8:30pm

Just a little story..

One day about a year ago I was having a really really ****ty day. I'd called up to my friends' house. They understand me very well and kinda know when I am having a bad time. They would just sit me at their table and plonk dinner in front of me. I would often just chill with them and their kids.. The kids come out with such classics that it is hard not to be cheered up..

Anyway on that particular bad evening, this is what they found for me on youtube, I still can't watch it without cracking up laughing!

Yeah I know it's ancient but ....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYpt8Q-6NzQ

KittyPot · 13-12-2011 8:31pm

I kinda always thought there must be something wrong with me, otherwise why would I feel the hopelessness and emptiness for no apparent reason! But reading all these posts has made me acknowledge that, yeah, maybe I have depression. Reading all this has actually made me feel a whole lot less, I dunno, broken I guess would be the word!
I just wanna say thanks to all of you!

Doctor_Socks · 13-12-2011 8:51pm

Excellent post DeV, sums up a lot of what depression is really all about. Especially the not feeling anything, I always thought everyone went through what I was going through, and that I should just learn to get over it rather then whinge about it, little did I know...

I suffer from it myself, not to long though in comparison to some of ye! Mine started around the age of 19, didn't really know what it was at that stage as I was so young, (I really only found out in the last few months due to how bad it got) just thought it was a side effect of drinking, I was in 3rd year of college doing engineering, was really close with my class so a fair amount of sessions were had! Thinking back about it, I was very, very lucky to have that class to help take my mind away from everything.

My depression took a serious downward spiral last year when my brother tried to commit suicide after a horrible few months of his life, the doctor said it was nothing short of a miracle that he survived the ordeal and i'm thankful for it everyday, I don't even want to imagine how our family would have gotten through it if he did die. I started to blame myself for what he did, I thought that my success made him feel bad about his own life, he's 5 years older then me and he was always pissed off that he couldn't find a course in college he liked and that I graduated before him. I also started a PhD and was getting a huge amount of attention from my relatives and friends who thought I was 'amazing' for starting one after having just turned 21. Now that I think back on it it was incredibly stupid of me to think that way but my mind was clouded with god knows how much crap that I couldn't think straight.

Other aspects of my life that used to just piss me off a bit slowly started to gnaw at the hole created by my brothers ordeal, making me feel worse and worse everyday. The main aspect being the work and stress involved for my PhD, and to add to that my parents were incredibly proud of me as were all of my other relations and friends, it gradually started to cause major panic attacks when I thought to myself 'what if I don't have what it takes to do this PhD, they'll all think i'm a failure', it just added to the hell building up inside me. One thing that used to drive me particularly insane was the use of the word 'genius' at home, I don't and never liked being defined by my intellect, all it did was make failures seem worse and me made me feel like I f*cked up in front of everyone who thought of me as a 'genius'.

When it was as its worst I wasn't able to concentrate on anything, couldn't connect with friends, couldn't even think about handling a relationship, lost all contact with my creative side and buried myself in uncreative work. Luckily I didn't alienate myself from my friends, unfortunately I did start drinking a lot more, even though I knew it just made things worse in the long run, it just felt nice having those 3-4 hours of feeling something else besides feeling like sh*te.

The only reason I got help was because a lad I work with noticed how stressed I was at work and suggested that I go to the counselor in the university, I owe that lad everything I have for telling me that he went to a counselor when he was feeling stressed, I don't think he realised everything else that was going on in my life. I have to say, my life turned around when I went in and released everything I had pent up for so long! It felt like a weight had been lifted off me! Since then i've started playing my guitar a lot more, write a lot more and generally spend a huge amount of time nurturing my creative side (something I thought an engineer could never have), i've also put a lot more time into physical exercise, a lot of heavy weight can really stop the mind from wandering to bad places and aiming for new personal bests every week, along with the endorphin release makes it feel incredible!

To sum up this long and awkward post, the day I got help and told someone about all of the problems in my life, I felt amazing! I literally felt I could do anything and I started to feel happy again! I still haven't been able to talk to my brother about his ordeal but i'm hoping some day i'll be able too.

Sorry if this is worded awful! It's really something I don't want to revisit but if it helps even one person not try to do what my brother did i'll be a happy man.

LETS ALL LAUGH AT PEOPLE WITH DEPRESSION!!

Comments