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I'm wondering if this has happened to anyone else, or if i'm just a complete weirdo
Has any1 even had a crush on some1 they thought they should'nd be physically attracted too, would'nd be seen dead with and not have a clue to why (chemically) they are attracted to them?
Originally posted by havok* should'nd be physically attracted too,
There is no reason at all why someone shouldn't be physically attracted to another person, it's perfectly normal. It's just your friends and family that you're worried about really. To be attracted to someone because of what someone else thinks about them is "complete wierdo". I have missed so many great experiences because of abstaining due to being taken the rip out of by my mates, it cant happen again!
And anyway, I've been out with a few nice looking ladies and they've shown me pictures of themselves when younger and a lot of them said that they were ugly when they were young, boys didn't fancy them etc.
Maybe they just need a good man like you to bring out the good woman that is SHE !
Go for it mate, the question is... what have YOU got to lose?
Anyway my opinion is thats just human nature, everyone has different tastes and sometimes you're gonna fall for someone who you think is attractive despite the fact you know they arn't attractive in the traditional sense
Yes, I know what you mean havok*, I've been that way a few times myself. I actually think that it means that I'm not always concerned by the looks of someone, despite the importance that is always placed upon them.
I think that this is a good thing, and any time I see a couple I remember that no matter how much more "good looking" one person may be, it genuinely doesn't matter in the long term (coz of course when we're all old and grey we'll all be ugly too )
Lots of people that I have ended up chasing (sucessfully or not ) have usually come to my attention for the wrong reasons. Give it a few weeks and you are likely to get over it.
The way i see it; you see something in this person that you like or have in common with, perhaps something that you do not show to the world.
IMO you are trying to maintain a certain image and you're embarrassed that if you are seen with this person, your peers will know something you do not wish them to know about you and you fear that.
You have to understand image is unimportant, happiness is all that counts and for all you know you may be very happy with this person.
Good luck to ya, i hope you make the right choice.
If its a shallow reason like looks or reputation, then I'd say ignore the popular opinion if your are inclined to do so.
But if its someone thats married, or a best friends mate, or even a cousin, i'd advise you to say well clear.
Dont break up a family or lose a good friend because your thinking with your dick! (or female equivalent!)
Xterminator thats sound advice to anyone there! Totally agree.. if its just a looks thing then it should not in theory be the most important thing. Though you sound like that are in some way physically attracted to her so she cant be that bad then.
Originally posted by havok*
I think u might have hit it pretty much on the nail there.
It appears to me that there's probably a lot about you that your friends, and perhaps family don't know about you.
You really need to get past your fear of expressing yourself, maintaining an image may make you popular in the short term but for the sake of your own happiness you really should be more open. Let people in, share a little, you'd be surprised at how understanding people can be.
If this person isn't related or already in a relationship I say go for it.
Healthy self esteem is reliant on us being open with each other, I speak from experience, I once kept a lot about me private and I was miserable. My life was filled with uncertainties, I never let anyone get close. I made a conscious effort to change and now I'll tell ya everything and anything about myself , and I’m a much happier person for it.
Originally posted by havok* Has any1 even had a crush on some1 they thought they should'nd be physically attracted too, would'nd be seen dead with and not have a clue to why (chemically) they are attracted to them?
Moped, n., Fun to ride until one of your mates catches you.
My advice: Go for it - ask her out (but somewhere your mates never go :rolleyes: ).
Disclaimer: The Corinthian accepts no responsibility for any advice he gives regarding relationships. Hell, you'd have to be mad to take his advice on them if you knew his track record. The Corinthian, however, reserves the right to laugh at you in the event of comical results.