Blonde (Andrew Dominik)

Pretty dire, unfortunately! Even amid the bad reviews, I’d hoped to like this: Andrew Dominik is an extremely talented chap; Ana de Armas is a pro and a star; and we need more ‘biopics’ (loosely used in this case) that are more about tone and vibe than simply recounting a life story or offering up a hagiography.

This at least looks impressive right out of the gate, and remains so for the most part (there are some terrible choices too, alluded to more below). Lots of thought has been put into channelling the look and feel of its eras, without being a mere pastiche or carbon copy. It’s a modern film with immaculate retro aesthetics.

But there’s not much more positive to say, alas - if only as much care and thought went in elsewhere! It’s a chore to watch: repetitive, shallow and one-note. There’s little pace or structure to speak of, just a 160 minute film without any proper shape or momentum. Yes, the film wallows in Monroe’s misery to quite a tedious and obnoxious extent, and emerges as an extraordinarily shallow take on her story (both real and fictionalised). But more baffling is how trite and cringey so much of it is. The endless ‘daddy’ mentions; the CG foetus; the - mortifyingly terrible - JFK scene. Some of these scenes are designed to provoke, but more than anything they’re so amateurish and ridiculous it makes the whole NC-17 controversy in the US seem laughable. Seriously, the JFK scene handles a grim sequence as if it’s a scene from The Naked Gun.

I wish there was something more here, but it’s a misfire. You’d be much better off watching Fire Walk With Me (a film that tackles some similar subject matter, just with real empathy towards its protagonist and clear-eyed direction) or one of Dominik’s own past features. Just a few months ago, he released a beautiful documentary / concert film that counts as one of the year’s best films. Now he’s balanced that out with one of the year’s most disappointing.