Things you want to say to husband/boyf/ex's/friends/family/people *MOD NOTE POST #1*

Some things just never change.

I know you are stressed, I know you are doing your best but seriously at this point I could just ****ing strangle you. We are both trying to help him, but 'tough love' won't help here. You tried that the last time and he almost ended up dead. And you seem to have taken that as a personal insult. Is it too much to ask for a tiny bit of compassion?

seriously mods, emojis need updating!

I know you're probably feeling sorry for yourself today, it being Fathers day, but really you should have tried harder to have a bit of decency and consideration for me. Anyone can be a sperm donor, takes a lot more to be a dad. You're welcome to the child you've chosen over me, and this is game over as far as I'm concerned. You sided with my abuser, and that is an unforgivable act. You don't get to hide behind a position of neutrality.

I hope you cry into your potatoes and gravy every Sunday when you have him for dinner, thinking about the things you are missing out on with me and your two granddaughters. Just remember, it was your choice. It might not have been a choice you like, but a choice nonetheless.

I'm disappointed but not surprised that you have chosen not to support me in seeking justice. All you had to do was agree to talk about your own experience and the fact that I disclosed certain things to you. Anyway, thankfully I have plenty of other people in my corner.

To be honest I have found our friendship really hard work over the last year or two. We just don't get each other anymore. Maybe that's why we drifted before. I'd been worried about inviting you to my wedding because every time you drink you go insane and attack the people closest to you. I knew you'd ruin my day and I was worried about how I would tell you that you're not welcome. Now I don't have to because I'm just cutting you off.

No drama or fighting, I know you'd love that because you're so bored right now. I'm just fading you out. By the time you've taken your head out of Instagram long enough to notice my silence, I'll be long gone and moved on.

I hope you find happiness and meet the person you are looking for, but I don't think you will until you stop treating people who care about you with absolute contempt and paranoia. Don't push people away when they show you love, concern and vulnerability. These are the jewels you should keep close to you. I think you will realise this too late, after you've pushed away everyone who cares about you

sporina wrote: »

this thread is great - there is no way I could say this stuff to the relevant people.. its like we are speaking different languages at times :mad::(

I find it's great for saying stuff that you would normally want to say but can't because you would either get shouted down or drawn into tit for tat argument, or become too upset. It really helps to get a clear view on how we feel and the reasons why.

I was supprised to get a FB pm that turned into a conversation from you recently. Ever since the whole covid thing started I have been making the effort to keep in contact with you but it been hard work.
Even before then you met Paula about 2 years ago and since then you have spent less time with me. Your just so busy and had plenty of excuses. You lied to me and I caught you out on this. I also feel that your were bad mouthing me as well to Mary but I can't prove this. I met Mary recently and she said in a nice way that she had not seen you in a long time either.
So why are you back in contact with me? Is it because you and Paula had a fall out? Is it because Paula circumstances have changed because of the covid situation? Is it because you hit a bad patch and you need my help to get you through it?

Where were you in the past 18 months when it came to giving me a bit of support? The odd phone call or even meeting up in a local town when the lockdowns were not happening would have been nice. Even since the lockdown ended 7 weeks ago you have been ignoring me most of the time up to now. Do you remember when you were going through a horrible time a few years ago who was their for you? I listened to your problems and I never shared them with other people. I helped you out in other ways as well then.

I asked you when you contacted me to meet me. I have decided that this is your last chance with me. If you don't meet me by Y date I won't be making any more effort to keep in contact with you. I am not just going to be their when you hit a bad patch or when you need a wingman. I won't be used until till some one better in your eyes comes along either. I won't listen to you complain about X because X has been their for me far more than you have over the past 18 months.

Over the past 18 month's I have been making plans and doing things to improve my life that you don't know about. I won't be as available in the future as I was in the past with you.

GG, C'mon, seriously?! Do I really need more grief right now?! [shakes head]

According to your words today, then nothing you said or did in our yesterdays meant anything.

You had me fooled, right and truly. In quite the same way she has you fooled, ironic, isn't it?

[Love] is a tale, Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing.

Dear X,

I sent you a message which I should have sent to you long before now. Since the lockdown ended I have tried to meet up with you. I have asked you to call to my house and also tried to meet you elsewhere. I have got every excuse why you can't do this. I told you something a few weeks ago by message and you never even said to me I am sorry that happened. Even A asked me how that particular thing was going and was sorry when I told them what happened. A few weeks ago I had an important event that you just ignored. You said I will call to see you but then never made the effort. You could have said I will meet you once I get y sorted out and I would have accepted that.

I did nothing to deserve the reply you gave me. I know your not happy becuase I finally said in a nice way that I have had enough of you treating me badly. We both know I would not do the same to you. In fact when I think back you were lucky to have me as a friend a few years ago when you were going though a horrible time. Without my help back then you would have ended in a far worse situation. When was the last time you made some effort for me?

You then said you were going to suggest that we go to x. You just said that to me to paint yourself in a better light. You think I am just going to say sorry and let you continue to treat me like this. I will say sorry when I make a mistake but I wont accept you taking your bad form out on me.

I know your dealing with a lot at the moment. Being honest if you had listened to my advice in the past you would not be dealing with as much now. I will reply to what you sent me when I am ready and I will pull you up on certain things you said. My days of taking poor behaviour from other people are over. I won't hang around to be used either. So once I reply to that message you sent me your going to know exactly where you stand with me. I was willing to overlook and let certain things go in the past but this is no longer the case espically where you are concerned.

i miss you every moment I don’t see you and miss you more every moment I do.

I wish I never found out you had feelings for me. I was never meant to fall in love with you. I was happy before I ever met you.

you deciding out of the blue, after months of working together and talking for hours every night, that you and I wouldn’t ever happen, broke my heart into a 1000 pieces and everytime I see you it’s like you stomp on my heart one more time to ensure it’s crushed.

And for god sake can you stop looking so hot 🔥

I now realise that you have NO CONSCIENCE.. you are just nasty.. heartless.. tried reasoning with you for the sake of others, and what to you do, you go and inflict more pain on people.. you are full of badness.. I use to feel sorry for you and make excuses for your ill behaviour - well no more.. at least I see you for who you really are now and know that there is no point ever trying to get you to be reasonable..