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Something to think about.............

  • 15-01-2003 9:46am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,372 ✭✭✭


    Something to think about when you get tired of wondering how the first person
    to eat an artichoke figured out how to do it.



    1. HOW DO YOU GET HOLY WATER? ... You boil the hell out of it.

    2. WHAT DO FISH SAY WHEN THEY HIT A CONCRETE WALL? ... Dam!

    3. WHAT DO ESKIMOS GET FROM SITTING ON THE ICE? ... Polaroids.

    4. WHAT DO YOU CALL A BOOMERANG THAT DOESN'T WORK? ... A stick.

    5. WHAT DO YOU CALL CHEESE THAT ISN'T YOURS? ... Nacho cheese.

    6. WHAT DO YOU CALL SANTA'S HELPERS? ... Subordinate Clauses.

    7. WHAT DO YOU CALL 4 BULLFIGHTERS IN QUICKSAND? ... Quatro sinko.

    8. WHAT DO YOU GET FROM A PAMPERED COW? ... Spoiled milk.

    9. WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A SNOWMAN WITH A VAMPIRE? ...Frostbite.

    10. WHAT LIES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN AND TWITCHES? ... A nervous wreck.

    11. WHERE DO YOU FIND A DOG WITH NO LEGS? ... Right where you left him.

    12. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ROAST BEEF AND PEA SOUP? ... Anyone can roast beef.

    13. WHY DO GORILLAS HAVE BIG NOSTRILS? ... Because they have big
    fingers.

    14. WHY DON'T BLIND PEOPLE LIKE TO SKY DIVE? ... Because it
    reeeeeaaaaaaly scares the dog.

    15. WHAT KIND OF COFFEE WAS SERVED ON THE TITANIC? ... Sanka.

    16. WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A HARLEY AND A HOOVER? ...
    The location of the Dirt Bag.

    17. WHY DO PILGRIMS PANTS ALWAYS FALL DOWN? ... Because they wear their belt buckles on their hat.

    18. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BAD GOLFER AND A BAD SKYDIVER? ... A bad golfer goes whack. A bad sky diver goes splat.

    19. HOW DO YOU CATCH A UNIQUE RABBIT? ... Unique up on it.

    20. HOW DO YOU CATCH A TAME RABBIT? ... Tame way, unique up on it.

    21. WHAT DO YOU CALL SKYDIVING LAWYERS? ... Skeet.

    22. WHAT GOES CLOP, CLOP, CLOP, BANG, BANG, CLOP, CLOP, CLOP? ... An Amish drive-by-shooting.

    23. HOW ARE A TEXAS TORNADO AND TENNESSEE DIVORCE THE SAME? ...
    Somebody's gonna lose a trailer.


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,136 ✭✭✭Pugsley


    18. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BAD GOLFER AND A BAD SKYDIVER? ... A bad golfer goes whack. A bad sky diver goes splat.
    rofl, me likes.


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