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erm hehe funstuff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • 26-02-2000 7:33pm
    #1
    Wyverne
    Closed Accounts Posts: 890 ✭✭✭


    > > INTEROFFICE MEMORANDUM
    > TO: ALL EMPLOYEES
    > FROM: Human Resources
    > It has been brought to management's attention that
    > some individuals throughout the company have been
    > using foul language during the course of normal
    > conversation with their co-workers.Due to complaints
    > received from some employees who may be easily
    > offended, this type of language will be no longer
    > tolerated.We do however, realize the critical
    > importance of being able to accurately express your
    > feelings when communicating with co-workers,
    > therefore, a list of "TRY SAYING" new phrases has
    > been
    > provided so that proper exchange of ideas and
    > information can continue in an effective manner
    > without risk of offending our more sensitive
    > employees.
    > SO TRY SAYING:
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Perhaps I can work late.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > When the f**k do you expect
    > me
    > > to do this?
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I'm certain that is not
    > > feasible.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > No f**king way!!
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Really?
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > You've got to be
    sh!tting me.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Perhaps you should check
    > > with...
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Tell someone who gives a
    > sh!t.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Of course I'm concerned.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Ask me if I give a sh!t.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I wasn't involved in the
    > > project.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > It's not my f**king problem.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > That's interesting.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > What the f**k?!?!
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I'm not sure I can implement
    > > this.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > F**k it, it won't work.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I'll try to schedule that.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Why the hell didn't you tell
    > me
    > > sooner?
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Are you sure this is a
    > problem?
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Who the f**k cares?
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > He's not familiar with the
    > > problem.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > He's got his head up his ass.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Excuse me sir?
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Eat sh1t and die
    > motherf**ker.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > So you weren't happy with it?
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Kiss my ass.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I'm a bit overloaded at this
    > > moment.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > F**k it, I'm on salary.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I don't think you understand.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Shove it up your ass.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I love a challenge.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > This job sucks.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > You want me to take care of
    > > that?
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Who the hell died and made
    > you
    > > boss?
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I see.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Blow me.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Yes, we really should discuss
    > > it.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > Another f**king meeting!!!
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I don't think this will be a
    > > problem.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I really don't give a sh!t.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > He's somewhat insensitive.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > He's a f**king
    pr!ck.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > She's an aggressive go
    > getter.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > She's a ball busting b!tch.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > >
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > TRY SAYING
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I think I could use more
    > > training.
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > INSTEAD OF
    > > > > > >>> > > >> > > I'm off to Dublin on the PiFF
    > > > > >
    > > > > >


    HEHE ENJOY!!!!!!!!

    This is Commander in chief of the USS Esses, signing off.


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