Classic Moments

lordsippa

Ok, probably been done to death already but anyone got some classic gaming quotes/one-liners/general anecdotes?

Personally my favourites have to be:
"MOVE AND I DIE!" <villian holding an innocent captive>

"And your sure the knife can be killed by her?"

GM: "You hear a knock on the door."
Player1: "Is there anything I can use to sense that?"
<stunned silence>
Player2: "Hearing perhaps?"

KevDaEdbanger

Need anyone bring up the Gazebo incedent from KoDT?

opps I guess I just did.

"If it burns, it can be Beaten!"

imp

Cloud, the fighter, gets his ass kicked, then the healer/priest runs over and heals him. The wizard shouts to the unknown assailant: "If you're so powerful, I bet you can't kill Cloud!!" The carriage falls on Cloud. The healer sighs, rolls up his sleeves and walks back over to Cloud...

Cloud, in one of his earlier adventures (when he didn't carry many weapons) was set upon for the first time by an Assassin. She failed to kill him, and attempted to flee. Cloud's reaction was to five Throwing Daggers, Five Ninja Death Stars, fire a crossbow bolt and use his scroll of flame fingers to blast her to oblivion. He killed her (barely). You should see his new arsenal...

In a heavily guarded warehouse, we had circumvented the security of the guard-phalanxes by simply pushing one over as they came up the stairs.

In Fighting Fantasy, a botched spell results in a roll by the GM to determine the (usually) detrimental effects. Balthazar, the mage, grew quite accustomed to squids appearing in mid air when he tried to cast spells. It happened six times in a row in one adventure, resulting in his theme song "Why do squids... suddenly appear... every time... Balthazar is near..."

After coming face to face to a major nemesis who attempted to escape, Haraknór charged after him diving through a trap door which barely shut behind him. Separated from the rest he continued hot on his preys heels, through a pit of nasties again barely getting through a trap-door in time. Finally he reached the magic barrier that only one other PC could get through and had to contend with passing the rest of his rounds hurling insults.

Balthazar rolls a spectacular success for testing an ability:
Balthazar: "Yes!! Damn I'm lucky!!"
Cloud: "Damn I'm HOT!!!"

One of our players insisted, for ALL of his early characters that he be the son of a Lumberjack. His current character is the first one to remain alive for more than 3 adventures. And the first one who wasn't a lumberjack. The lesson: being the son of a lumberjack gets you killed faster.

After an encounter with the unbeatable Jonathon, Falcon used an incredible magical item which almost drained his entire soul, to kill Jonathon (which in the end only bought us time) creating a HUGE crator in the ground. After a long and frenzied run away from the danger, the PC's stopped to rest. There, their old enemy the Riddling Reaver appeared (attracted by the huge magical burst). He tsked at the group but didn't attack. Shortly afterwards another newer enemy arrived and attempted to again persuade the newest party member to join him. When he was refused blasting ensued (between the party, their NPC leader and him). Eventually he was forced away. Then, later, Nadia (the master vampire and arch-nemesis of Haraknór) arrived. She eventually managed to get hold of Haraknór and turn him after a HUGE magical battle. The result of this was the BEST RPG MOMENT EVER! Nadia was turning Haraknór while, attracted by the intense levels of magic in the area, Nicodemus (considered the worlds best mage) arrived alongside his enemy Rimmer. Then, as more magic was expended in THAT battle, Yaztromo (an equally powerful mage) and his arch-nemesis Zagor arrived side by side. Both turned to face each other: "YOU!" and blasting ensued. By this point our GM's eyes were wide with horror (he had rolled for everyone who arrived). Eventually Nicodemus and Yaztromo won through and turned their attention to Haraknór. He was wild with rage and screaming for his axe (which he was quite fond of). Unfortunately for everyone his axe was broken. All hell broke loose (he had just recently discovered he was a sorcerer of some power and that coupled with his vampiric rage made much fire...) until he was eventually sedated. To this day, nothing will grow in the still smoking crator of the most ridiculous encounter rolling EVER. Not to mention that it's now a new (if much smaller) Chaos Wastes.

}:>

Khynareth

A bastet group. They are in a Demon's Pit. The pit is actually an entrance, a 2m ledge after the ledge is a cliff giving on a river of lava, after the lava, a wall of stone.
The Demon grabs Jamal, a bagheera. Axel, the Corax jumps and flies to help Jamal out of the Demons grip wings wide open to slow down their fall.

Jamal, in mind speech to Axel: 'Do you think the pit under us is the Demons stomac and if we fall we'll be digested?'

Axel, distracted forgets to start beating his wings again and hits the wall. Off they faaaaaaaaaallllllll....




My first (& vicious) GM (Experience thaught me later that they all were, I thus became one myself...) on day decided that in Warhammer Fantasy, fireballs had to be aimed.
As we were real newbies to that game, we (Oh mistake) trusted him. So, our youngly formed party: a paladin (Kheldaran), a priest (Ryel) and an Elementalist (Rowin). Left for A Quest...
We ended up lost in a magical forest and non of us had the skills to find our way out. Rowin could detect the forest was magic, but finding the way out was really another sotry.
We wandered there for a few weeks, our supplies quickly died, so we decided to hunt.
First day, a rabbit, that wasn't much.
Second day, berries, a Pheasan, God, I'm hungry!!!
Third day Hogs!!! Oh Yeah, Hogs!!! Kheldaran charged, missed and nearly broke her magical sword.

The Ryel shot his bow and missed, and missed again.
The mage, seing that, start invoking a fireball, so that they would have a ready roast for the night. Missed, tried again, missed again and set the forest on fire.

They then started running as fast as they could away from the fire, and found the Evil Mage's Lair.

About a year later, I got the rulebook to become a GM myself, and learnt that Fireballs had an automatic hit...
Yes, I did take my war hammer to slay the GM... Ahhh, that was good!!!
;>

Hobbes

"I attack the darkness" - summoner geeks demo.

Draco

In the earth temple of Temple of Elemental attacking the clerics (as you do). Somehow the clerics were all blinded (I can't remeber how). The thief of the party wasn't really paying attention and missed this detail. He was asked what he was doing and he told the DM he was hiding behind the curtains. Next round, he was asked what he was doing and he ask if the could see him. the DM just says "no". He says "I keep it that way". We say nothing for a bout another 10 minutes until one of the group, sick of hearing the exchange roared "they're blind you fcuking idiot!"

lordsippa

ok... was playing a very specific one on one island conquest (mage vs. mage) thing with a friend (and a gm).

the enemy mage was disguising as an allies soldier to try to enter my base and assassinate me. i wasn't there, but i heard of his plan and set a trap. under my keep is a volcano and there's a room which is magically sealed wherein lies a pit leading to the lava. he was led there upon his arrival (to meet with the other "allies") and then left in there. with the door closed behind. he walked in willingly and when the gm heard my plan, he expected there to be the usual "throw him in" thing. when he heard that i simply wanted to lock him in there he was astounded. so now the guy's simply locked away and i'm free to run rampant! whee!

oh. and while my enemy forces gather against me at their strong point of defence i send off raiding parties to destroy their homelands and hence cut off their supplies. hehe... fools!


i like this game (it's almost over)

Khynareth

Still in Warhammer fantasy.

We are surrounded by.... Ah, I don't know how they are called in English, the very small goblins that usually go around in bunch of 30 and eat everything... Anyway, we call them morveux (snotties)
Our Paladin fumbles his attack, breaks his magic sword. Furious, he grabs a snotty with each hand and start hitting all the others left in the room. He gets to the corner of the room, there is only one snotty left who looks at him with big green runny eyes and says:

'Mamma'

Loyal good character took the snotty away with him and kept him as a pet for quite a while...