What Chat up lines do you use?

R0ot

Personally i don't use chat up lines but one i heard recently sounded like the most cheesey line possible:
Guy: Hey, did it hurt?
Girl: What?!, Did what hurt?
Guy: When you feel from heaven?
(After this line the girl got up laughed and walked away, and me and the 4 other of my mates that heard this were laughing for the rest of the night)

So what chat up lines do you use, preferably better than this one ^^^

EDIT: My sister has just informed me that this line is from some movie

Dave!

I plan on using this one at some stage...

Guy: How much does a polar bear weigh?
Girl: em... I dunno...
Guy: Enough to break the ice -- hi, I'm Dave...
(conversation carries on, resulting in Dave getting some ass as a result of his amazing wit and good looks :cool:)

Matthewthebig

Did you know humans are part water, I'm not jewish, want to make love?

works all the time

R0ot

DaveMcG wrote:

I plan on using this one at some stage...

Guy: How much does a polar bear weigh?
Girl: em... I dunno...
Guy: Enough to break the ice -- hi, I'm Dave...
(conversation carries on, resulting in Dave getting some ass as a result of his amazing wit and good looks :cool:)

CLASSIC!

Shrimp

Guy: Does your face hurt?
Girl: em.. What? No..
Guy: Well it's killin me..

Somehow it doesn't work.

feylya

"You'll do"

weemcd

it might be the drink talking, but you look completly average.

carpothepunk

"if you were a good looking girl,with a short skirt,id be on you right now,bye" :rolleyes:

Asok

"I'm drunk! <Point at fat friend they just said liked you> BUT NOT LAND WHALE DRUNK!"

Matthewthebig

/me points to pants

"penis"

Dave!

^
lol... What's the usual reaction?

"door" ?

Scraggs

What i use...
*If I told you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
*[Looking at his shirt label.] When they say, "What are you doing?": Checking to see if you were made in heaven.

What i would use if i had the guts [or copius amounts of alcohol]...
*Fúck me if I'm wrong, but don't you want to kiss me?
*(Use index finger to call em over then say) If I made you come this fast with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.

I'm a sucker for chat up lines....

Dave!

Scraggs wrote:

*(Use index finger to call em over then say) If I made you come this fast with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.

I can imagine that one would work WONDERS!:D I wish a chick would say that to me...:(

R0ot

Scraggs wrote:

*(Use index finger to call em over then say) If I made you come this fast with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.

/me wonders if that would work with girls....

*adele*

Scraggs wrote:

*If I told you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

i had that one used on me and i didnt get it till the next day

Tar.Aldarion

it gets you a slap i would imagine there r0ot

i like that polar bear one!

and i have been known to say ''*If I told you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?'' to friends

Scraggs

Hey DaveMcG come here a second [calls u over with finger gesture]...

....If I made you come this fast with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.


R0ot...it might work on girls but ya might get a slap [i'd never slap ya tho *winks]

Dave!

Scraggs wrote:

Hey DaveMcG come here a second [calls u over with finger gesture]...

....If I made you come this fast with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.

:eek:

My kinda girl!

Scraggs

*blush

cooperguy

I read this on Boards somewhere "Do you want to go halves on a bastard!!"

Now thats what I call a chat up line!!!

Scraggs

word of the day is legs
wanna go back to my flat and spread the word?

grimloch

"Does this rag smell like chloroform?"

Sparky

im never good at chat-up lines, i just go straight in and start a chat, sometimes it works

Naos

Step 1) Aquire a screw
Step 2) Walk up to pretty lady, say fancy a screw?
Step 3) Just as she is about to slap you/Curse you,
Step 4) Present said screw.

This worked in a club in Spain(I lost a bet so had to do it)
Also worked in college, only the lady(table of 4 sitting of on their own in canteen) said "Yeah okay" before I had the chance to show the screw. Caught me off guard

Sparky

Scraggs wrote:

word of the day is legs
wanna go back to my flat and spread the word?

now thats good:D

Farls

"Would you like the ride?"

if they say WHAT? you reply with

"I've a pain in my side, goodluck!"

Sparky

Farls wrote:

"Would you like the ride?"

if they say WHAT? you reply with

"I've a pain in my side, goodluck!"

is that the always keep them wondering policy?:)

Farls

Haha...i guess man, haven't used chat up lines ever i dont think! I've heard loads though but just can't think of them at the moment! Big one up in Donegal at the moment is

"Are ya for the do?"

if theres a mixed response

"What do ya do?"

Of course these are a lot more forward...but funny all the same

WhiteWashMan

fancy a fúck?

jonnybadd

Here, love, giz a shot

Simple easy and straight to the point

thesteve

"I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long..."

scojones

I don't really use chat up lines to be honest, they're kinda cheesy, do girls ever even fall for them?

thesteve

"If you and I were squirrels, could I bust my nut in your hole?..."

Coney Island

"Hi"

Tiffany

*points to my signature*

And chat up lines make me feel pity for a guy, and not the good kind of pity.

Mossy Monk

for whom do the chat up lines provide a 100% no failure rate

Dave

"You've a beautiful face, it'd look better at the end of my knob though"

nlgbbbblth

a friend of mine swears by

'Hello. I am extremely interested in finding pictures of men rimming dogs. I've found a couple out there but i seem to have hit a roadblock and can't find anymore. Can you help?'

I would be sceptical however.

Le Rack

Guy : Do you work in the post office?
Girl : Huh? What, no why?
Guy : Oh I just see you been checking out my package all night!

Guy to girl : The human body has 375 bones in it. Want another one?
Or if girl to guy "Can I have another one?"

Time for the cheese!

Guy : Gee your legs must be tired
Girl : What, no, why?
Guy : Oh you've been running through my mind all day

And most the other cheese-puff ones have been done but if its in training with people I don't know, "Hey, so how long you been training?" Or "So which club you from?" I don't see the point in chat up lines, but I have to say a cheesy funny one always rock

angeldelight

Of all the ones I've read here, the only one that would work on me is the polar bear one cause it'd make me laugh and that's always good!

I actually had a guy use the "Is your father a thief, cause he stole 2 stars from the sky for your eyes". My friends and I looked at each other then stood up and left. Sorry but it was so bad it wasn't even funny

Dave!

Cool, I've got a chance with angeldelight!

Kinetic^

angeldelight wrote:

Of all the ones I've read here, the only one that would work on me is the polar bear one cause it'd make me laugh and that's always good!

I actually had a guy use the "Is your father a thief, cause he stole 2 stars from the sky for your eyes". My friends and I looked at each other then stood up and left. Sorry but it was so bad it wasn't even funny

:eek: That was so rude of you to walk away from me like that

sinjin_smythe

I just use the old charm and the lines "wanna go halves on a baby" o yeah works every time

ando

'If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together'

'have you ever been penetrated'


ah, what would you do without Family Guy

Scraggs

ando wrote:

'If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together'

I had a lad try use this on me one night it was so funny,
It took him three attempts he kept messin it up sayin 'u and me'/ 'me and u' etc. instead of 'u and i'. It was very cute and it worked!

Mysteryfish

I'm sorry but chat up lines are so cheesy! All you'd probably get in reply is either a raised eyebrow or she'd laugh at you. Just start chatting to her, or if you must use the chat up lines, use them in a mocking way, as in that you think they're funny and you're trying to make her laugh WITH you about them.

Kinetic^

Scraggs wrote:

I had a lad try use this on me one night it was so funny,
It took him three attempts he kept messin it up sayin 'u and me'/ 'me and u' etc. instead of 'u and i'. It was very cute and it worked!

Hey scraggs, you really are a sucker for the chat up lines.

In case you were wondering my name is Justin, Justin Credible!!!!! :cool:

Scraggs

any relation to Justin Time??
coz ur ***** is magnificant!!!

jsr

Guy: what do you think of prostitution ?
Girl: evil and wrong.
Guy: ok shag me for free.

True story.

Kinetic^

Scraggs wrote:

any relation to Justin Time??
coz ur ***** is magnificant!!!

Well I'm lost!!!
Does that mean you want me

Scraggs

suggestive wink