Your Sexuality....

Undercoverguy

Hey Guys, Got some weird news today. A very close mate of mine came out of the closet today, he's aged 17 (18 this week). I've been friends with this guy since i was 10 and i thought i knew him more than he knew himself but this was a major shock! He had a loada girlfriends in the past but over the last year or so he wasnt with anyone long term cos he always seemed to break it off. I never thought much of it tho.
So the last few days he'd been acting really strange and saying that he had to tell us something, so today me and another close friend went down to see him which is when he broke the news. We were GobSmacked, cos you would NEVER in a million years guess he was gay. He's like the typical "Beckham" our age, Gray bottems, K-Swis and styled (natural) blonde hair who never really had any problems getting girls attention.

Anyway he broke down crying and told us that he'd been struggleing to come to terms with it for almost a year now but he had feelings since he was around 15-16 but thought it was just part of the whole puberty thing with all crazy emotions and stuff, only they never went away and they only got stronger. Me and Rob (other mate) were 100% supportive and told him it wasnt the end of the world and that we'd never think any different of him and there was noting wrong with being gay that he was our best mate regardless and this wasnt going to change anything. So after a hour of so of kinda calming him down we were able to (kinda) joke about it and talk about it more. He's ok now and is planning on coming out to his family, rest of our friends this weekend who i hope to dear god dont change twords him. If they do they shouldnt be our friends and his family would just be evil.

The only thing i'm wondering is this.
He said he doubted his sexuality for almost 2 years. Now i reckon we all have at some point right? Well apparntly not! A few guys i know claim they were never even slightly attracted to guys.... EVER, even during puberty.

Now when i say attracted i mean like looking at the oppsite sex and thinking on some level "He's/She's Fit!" or not being able to take your eyes off them.

So my question to both Guys and Gals on this thread is,

Have You ever doubted your sexuality?

(POLL BELOW)

Playboy

Personally I have never doubted my sexuality but most people have sexual thoughts towards members of their own sex at some stage. Its a perfectly natural thing and nothing to be worried about. Most people dont fall into a straight or gay category, there are many different levels of bi-sexuality that exist. I know plenty of gay guys who have been with women at different stages and enjoyed it but they would class themsleves as gay and not bi. I also know straight guys who have been with men and enjoyed it but wouldnt class themselves as bi or gay. I guess what I am trying to say is that sexuality is a very strange thing and people dont fall into categories easily. You are best of not thinking of people as gay, straight or bi but just let them be who they are without attaching a tag to it

Karl Hungus

"I thought I was gay for a bit... But then I found out about the prohibitive levels of hygene... And all that DANCING!"

Mossy Monk

never felt the urge for another man tbh

Karl Hungus

Mossy Monk wrote:

never felt the urge for another man tbh

Ah, but that doesn't mean you have never felt the urge OF another man!

NotMe

Undercoverguy wrote:

A few guys i know claim they were never even slightly attracted to guys.... EVER, even during puberty.

Eh yeah... don't you think that's normal? Cos I sure do. The only way I'd know if a guy is attractive is if women say he is. Otherwise I couldn't tell. (Unless he's really ugly).

Mossy Monk

:eek: :eek: :eek:

*Angel*

NotMe wrote:

The only way I'd know if a guy is attractive is if women say he is. Otherwise I couldn't tell. (Unless he's really ugly).

That's weird, honestly I can't believe you. I could tell if a women was attractive and I'm straight.

Gazza22

No honestly i haven't ever been interested in another man

Hope all goes well for your mate, terrible to see that a doubt/change of sexuality causes such stress to the person involved.

Goodshape

Interesting poll.. so far leaning strongly toward the 'never doubted' option, which I find interesting.

Personally, it never passed... and I found it quite difficult to come to terms with that. Maybe if I had known that most people don't ever question the issue I wouldn't have waited so long for the 'right' feelings to come along.

Fair play to your friend anyway. I think 17/18 is a turbulant enough time as it is.. best not to keep these things bottled up.

CrimE

Nah never doubted myself. I have always known that I am straight. I'm sure though its not unusual for hormonal teens to experience confusion at some point just depends on the person I suppose.

pwd

I've been sexually attracted to myself. But only once or twice and they were very good photos.

flogen

as far as knowing a member of the same sex is attractive (without having to be gay or bi), women tend to be able to do it better than men. Maybe it's because women are a much more attractive breed, I dunno.
Saying that, there are times I'll know when a guy is good looking, but it's mainly going on patterns I'd see in what are classed as generally attractive guys (like your Brad Pitts or Johnny Depps). It's more a case of knowing someone should be attractive than actually thinking they are.

I've never doubted my sexuality, at no point have I found men a turn on or attractive in anyway.

Deadwing

Undercoverguy wrote:

NEVER in a million years guess he was gay. He's like the typical "Beckham" our age, Gray bottems, K-Swis and styled (natural) blonde hair who never really had any problems getting girls attention.

And you didnt guess he was gay just from those hints??

Dave

I've never doubted my sexuality, but I would recognise other men as being attractive, and have no problem saying it which some of my other friends find odd. I think tigers are a good looking animal, but it doesn't mean I want to fvck them.

newgrange

Being gay or straight doesn't make you blind.
I can see how other people would find Brad Pitt attractive, but it doesn't mean I want anything to do with him.

DawnMc

Never doubted as such. I was with a couple of girls (scored) just for the laugh and I suppose I'd try anything once!

jcoote

women are more affectionate than men and men have a certain level of manliness to uphold...we can't say brad pitt is a fine thing because we'll be called gay not just by other people but by our own ego's...****ed up innit...anyway i never doubted my hetroness

NotMe

*Angel* wrote:

That's weird, honestly I can't believe you. I could tell if a women was attractive and I'm straight.

Yeah I've noticed that women can tell if other women are attractive but (from my experience) men can't. Well apparently some can.. I dunno.

Skip

I think many men can certainly tell if a guy's attractive or not, they just don't want to admit it. Same with women though, if it comes to their own sex.

jcoote

most girls i know will say 'oh she's gorgeous' or whatever...a lot of my mates would say 'he's a handsome devil' also ...they are fairly comfortable in their sexuality maybe thats the key bein comfortable within yoself

joejoem

I was never attracted to men but I did wonder, I would say everyone does. I tried to imagine it but it never floated my boated. There should be an option for that.

BizzyC

I can tell if a guys attractive, but only cause I know what women look for.
I can safely say I have never been attracted to another guy.

r3boot

straight as a ruler......

TerrorFirmer

NotMe wrote:

Eh yeah... don't you think that's normal? Cos I sure do. The only way I'd know if a guy is attractive is if women say he is. Otherwise I couldn't tell. (Unless he's really ugly).

Well now that reeks of a homophobe, I'm 100% straight and could easily tell if another man is good looking, no more then a woman can tell if another woman is beautiful without being gay.

On the issue, I've never once doubted my sexuality, and it's totally silly to imply that all males doubt their sexuality at some stage.

NotMe

MobileInfantry wrote:

Well now that reeks of a homophobe, I'm 100% straight and could easily tell if another man is good looking, no more then a woman can tell if another woman is beautiful without being gay.

On the issue, I've never once doubted my sexuality, and it's totally silly to imply that all males doubt their sexuality at some stage.

I'm a homophobe because I don't find men attractive? You say you can tell if a man is good looking. Is that because he fits some stereotype of what you know to be good looking or is it because you are physically attracted to him?

roberteboot

I think you can tell if someones goodlooking without being attracted to them or having to have a girl tell you that theyre goodlooking.I mean for **** sake its prety easy to tell the difference between a guy whose goodlooking and a guy whose ugly even if you are a)a man and b)completely straight.

Kingp35

Well I can safely say that I have never been attracted to guys and have never doubted my sexuality.

As for being able to tell if a guy is attractive. I could prob tell if a guy is very good looking or if he looks like a dogs arse. as for the in between guys I wouldnt have a clue and thats bein honest

azezil

Had a crush on a couple of women in my youth... ew I feel dirty >_<

Playboy

MobileInfantry wrote:

On the issue, I've never once doubted my sexuality, and it's totally silly to imply that all males doubt their sexuality at some stage.

Maybe not all males but you would be suprised at the amount that do. If you have a look at the work of Alfred Kinsey and other sexologists you will see how the majority of people dont fall into a straight or gay category but somewhere inbetween.

roberteboot

Kingp35 wrote:

Well I can safely say that I have never been attracted to guys and have never doubted my sexuality.

As for being able to tell if a guy is attractive. I could prob tell if a guy is very good looking or if he looks like a dogs arse. as for the in between guys I wouldnt have a clue and thats bein honest

The in betweenies would generally come down to a judgement call by the girl i reckon.I dont like to concern myself with them.Theyre nothing but trouble.

Jonny Arson

Since I was young I've always prefered to pot the pink instead of the brown.

BlitzKrieg

oi???!!!!???!!!


where's the i dont give two f*cks about my sexuality choice (atari jaguar coulda helped?)

entropi

Undercoverguy wrote:

He's like the typical "Beckham" our age, Gray bottems, K-Swis and styled (natural) blonde hair.

This says it all really, how u didn't notice is beyond me

Just kidding, not sure where i heard it but but it seems a large percentage of blokes feel a little gay at one stage in their lives, i've never doubted my own sexuality before and percieve i never will either. All i can suggest is take it one day at a time, accept who he is and what way he feels...

Tar.Aldarion

Eh yeah... don't you think that's normal? Cos I sure do. The only way I'd know if a guy is attractive is if women say he is. Otherwise I couldn't tell. (Unless he's really ugly).



truth notme truth

Tar.Aldarion

roberteboot wrote:

I think you can tell if someones goodlooking without being attracted to them or having to have a girl tell you that theyre goodlooking.I mean for **** sake its prety easy to tell the difference between a guy whose goodlooking and a guy whose ugly even if you are a)a man and b)completely straight.

thats just a lie...:) there are levels of sexuality and the closer you are to the gay border(even if your not accross) you are the beeter you can tell...i really have absolutely no idea if a guy looks god or not.none.(unless absolutely disfigured)


oh edit...girls seem to be able to tell because of upbringing and the hang up with appearance...maybe all bisexual ? :P

bopper

I'd go for the fourth option. I don't think I really knew what I was attracted to until I hit puberty. It wasn't until I reached about 12/13 and started masturbating that I knew I fancied guys. Girls just didn't turn me on, and still don't.

Tar.Aldarion

haha thats a really ..good point :rolleyes:

Kare Bear

Whats wrong with being able to tell if another guys goodlooking.

Nothing gay about that imo.

Tar.Aldarion

lol i know there is nothing 'gay' about it but it seems to be my more 'fashionable' friesnds who have the ability

BlitzKrieg

Hahahaaa...its my opinion who i think is attractive or not male or female, i'm not very fashionable (according to some i have no taste whatsoever,) and my sexuality doesnt come into question wtish such topics it has very little to do with my sexuality and i get the impression that those who feel that sexuality and *fashionable* come into equation when discussing if someone looks nice or not have a serious sexuality problem acorn shoved up their ass.

Sparky

BlitzKrieg wrote:

Hahahaaa...its my opinion who i think is attractive or not male or female, i'm not very fashionable (according to some i have no taste whatsoever,) and my sexuality doesnt come into question wtish such topics it has very little to do with my sexuality and i get the impression that those who feel that sexuality and *fashionable* come into equation when discussing if someone looks nice or not have a serious sexuality problem acorn shoved up their ass.

Thats because your satin

and im god so im perfect in all sexual ways.

why do you think all the posh ladies always say OH MY GOD.

BlitzKrieg

cause your the only one desperate enough to sleep with over 70 posh ladies with a very off skin to bone ratio...

Sparky

so its not 70 posh girls its about 200 and anyway satin does it to boys

BlitzKrieg

so?


at least its cute boys



unlike the descendents of the ugly stiick marrage to Margaret Thatcher that you sleep with...

Sparky

oh my ME, thats evil, but your evil i know, atleast i pretened to to it, i use a brush handle and a paper bag for that one, she has to be one of the ugliest creation ive made along with the latest george bush, i was drunk when they were being created.

must lay of drink, cept for 25 DEC

jptk

I also cant tell if another mans attractive or not, and its really annoyin when people say im lying!

Sparky

jptk wrote:

I also cant tell if another mans attractive or not, and its really annoyin when people say im lying!

yeah when girls say hes cute, tbh i dont see how sometime, is it the hair? etc etc.

LookingFor

You're "programmed" from an early age to recognise attractive features in a person, regardless of gender. It's part of human nature, your subconcious is constantly responding to the way people look, even if your concious perception of that person overrides their physical appearance. Fundamental perception of people has been shown to be remarkably linked to how they look (for example, good looking people are often perceived to be more trustworthy etc.). It's an unfortunate truth, perhaps.

Attraction works on multiple levels. Sexual attraction is one aspect of that. You can be attracted to someone of your own sex for a combination of reasons, including perhaps looks - but also success, intelligence, money, confidence etc. etc. - but that kind of attraction does not imply sexual attraction. The reason why popular people are popular is because they attract people in one way or another. That doesn't mean all their friends want to jump their bones.

NotMe

LookingFor wrote:

You're "programmed" from an early age to recognise attractive features in a person, regardless of gender. It's part of human nature, your subconcious is constantly responding to the way people look, even if your concious perception of that person overrides their physical appearance. Fundamental perception of people has been shown to be remarkably linked to how they look (for example, good looking people are often perceived to be more trustworthy etc.). It's an unfortunate truth, perhaps.

Attraction works on multiple levels. Sexual attraction is one aspect of that. You can be attracted to someone of your own sex for a combination of reasons, including perhaps looks - but also success, intelligence, money, confidence etc. etc. - but that kind of attraction does not imply sexual attraction. The reason why popular people are popular is because they attract people in one way or another. That doesn't mean all their friends want to jump their bones.

Yeah I'll agree with that but I think we're talking about sexual attraction.

Tar.Aldarion

oh i forgot to say to the OP ,a girl i was goin out with this year....found out she was a lesbian when she was going out with me! what a confidence booster..i can turn hot girls into lesbians give half a chance...