One For the Girls

Le Rack

this isn't a PI its just something I was thinking about recently...
When you've broken up with someone, and your thinking about it after do you ever feel somewhat violated, so to speak, as if your saying to yourself "I cant believe I let him do that to me" sort of thing?

TerrorFirmer

Sometimes I think...Man, I cant believe she let ME do that to her.....!

Le Rack

dumbass, thats just kinda sick since you probably get a thrill out of it! I dunno its happened me an dits kinda scary...

TerrorFirmer

Le Rack wrote:

dumbass, thats just kinda sick since you probably get a thrill out of it! I dunno its happened me an dits kinda scary...

Eek, take a joke. On a serious note, I never do anything we arent both mutally agreed on. Would never pressure anyone to do anything!

Le Rack

i laughed at first, then typed then laughed some more, but yeah I'm always okay with it and he is but just when you've broken up having been in quite a serious relationship... I dunno maybe its cuz I'm young...

aidan_dunne

Le Rack wrote:

this isn't a PI its just something I was thinking about recently...
When you've broken up with someone, and your thinking about it after do you ever feel somewhat violated, so to speak, as if your saying to yourself "I cant believe I let him do that to me" sort of thing?

I'm really surprised nobody else has asked this question yet but what exactly did he/they do to you that has you thinking about all this lately and leaving you feeling "violated" as you put it? It sounds like it must have been pretty bad. What happened, did he have his way with you in a bath full of cold beans and chopped-up liver or something?

monkeyfudge

My moneys on a rim job.

Mr.Nice Guy

I think he was wearing her clothes and she found out about it...

Selik

My money's on anal!

Oriel

Giles wrote:

My money's on anal!

Touche...

Oriel

Giles wrote:

anal!

Actually, that's kinda a disturbing combination...

monkeyfudge

anal + rim job = felching

Töpher

Only if you succeed in extracting it all...

simu

Le Rack wrote:

this isn't a PI its just something I was thinking about recently...
When you've broken up with someone, and your thinking about it after do you ever feel somewhat violated, so to speak, as if your saying to yourself "I cant believe I let him do that to me" sort of thing?

It's possible for this to happen alright but it's not fair to claim you feel violated after having consented to doing something. Mark it off as something you might want to avoid repeating instead and also, in future cases, don't do things unless you really want to.

ven0m

Yeah but I'll bet it's not as scary as when some chick actually asked me to "choke" her while we were doing it.... my response was WHHHHAAAAATTTTT!!!! :eek: ............ Did it anyways LOL


::: ven0mous :::

Kiera

Le Rack wrote:

When you've broken up with someone, and your thinking about it after do you ever feel somewhat violated, so to speak, as if your saying to yourself "I cant believe I let him do that to me" sort of thing?

Yes i've felt like that with 2 ex bf's. Its coz the 2 of them slept with someone else on me and i felt horrible after i found out. Not a good feeling at all and i think its made me very hard towards men now. Took about 9 months to let my bf now get close to me.

jor el

You can't really feel violated if you agreed to do it in the first place, just because you're no longer together. You can feel contempt for yourself or him because of what you did or let him do. You can also feel regret and shame too.

All this has me wondering what it was though. Was it just sex and now you feel bad because you realise what an ar$e he is? Or was it freaky stuff like is being suggested above. Oh and if you don't know what felching is then I'd advise that you don't look it up, if you couldn't guess what it was already that is.





It wasn't a cleveland steamer was it?

simu

Kiera wrote:

Yes i've felt like that with 2 ex bf's. Its coz the 2 of them slept with someone else on me and i felt horrible after i found out. Not a good feeling at all and i think its made me very hard towards men now. Took about 9 months to let my bf now get close to me.

Well, this would only be relevant if you had requested that they sleep with other people.

Kiera

How do you work that out, Simu?

simu

When you've broken up with someone, and your thinking about it after do you ever feel somewhat violated, so to speak, as if your saying to yourself "I cant believe I let him do that to me" sort of thing?

The above suggests that the op regrets some taking part in some sexual act or some such thing with her ex. If a guy cheats on you, it's not something you let him do, it's something he does behind your back. Unless you're going to go the way of "if only I had done x, he wouldn't have gone off with somebody else" but that is not a healthy or realistic way of thinking imo.

Kiera

simu wrote:

The above suggests that the op regrets some taking part in some sexual act or some such thing with her ex. If a guy cheats on you, it's not something you let him do, it's something he does behind your back. Unless you're going to go the way of "if only I had done x, he wouldn't have gone off with somebody else" but that is not a healthy or realistic way of thinking imo.

Well she didn’t say it was sexual! Why are you having a go at me for saying my piece? Now if Le Rack had of said about feeling violated “sexually” Then you would have a point but she didn’t in her first post!

jor el

Ah yes, but if Kiera let him have sex with her then found out he was shagging someone else she would feel violated or used because she trusted a no good cheater.

Kiera

jor el wrote:

Ah yes, but if Kiera let him have sex with her then found out he was shagging someone else she would feel violated or used because she trusted a no good cheater.

EXCATLY!!! Thank you, Jor x

simu

Kiera wrote:

Well she didn’t say it was sexual! Why are you having a go at me for saying my piece? Now if Le Rack had of said about feeling violated “sexually” Then you would have a point but she didn’t in her first post!

I didn't say it was necessarily sexual but it was implied that consent was given to something.

Kevin_rc_ie

he used her phone to call home to Nigeria

Kiera

Kevin_rc_ie wrote:

he used her phone to call home to Nigeria

There you go, Simu! Nothing sexual at all!

simu

Kiera wrote:

There you go, Simu! Nothing sexual at all!

Do you do this on purpose?

Kiera

Do I do what?

simu

Do that thing you do dooby doo.

Kiera

I do

Le Rack

it wasn't freaky-ass sexual ****, joer el darling I know my stuff, snowballing, felching, with follow through, its just I dunno, I'm saying violated for want of a better word but, its just that ya know when you break up with someone under bad terms everythin that you did together in seeming acts of "love" becomes kinda void and wasteful, not that I'm one of those "no sex before marraige" types, I'd never survive but neh...

Sarky

You're wondering what the point was, yes? Whether there's any meaning in what you may or may not have done together?

Le Rack

yeah a little column A little column B, the wondering causes the "violation" I suppose

simu

Well, if you experienced pleasure at the time, isn't that enough?

Le Rack

look simu you're entirely missing the point, you did it with Kiera now you're doing it with me.

Sarky

Le Rack wrote:

yeah a little column A little column B, the wondering causes the "violation" I suppose

As long as it was sincere at the time, there's no reason to wonder. Dwelling on it just cheapens it, really. That doesn't mean thinking about it won't happen, it's fairly natural as far as I can tell. It's just something that happens. And then, at some point, you'll forget about it.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

actually I think simu and sarky said pretty much the same thing. sarky was just a little more elegant about it.

which is peculiar..

Le Rack

thats just it, no matter what, my mind keeps wandering back to certain incidents, I could be in the middle or something huge and I'll still be there re-living it all!

simu

Mordeth wrote:

actually I think simu and sarky said pretty much the same thing. sarky was just a little more elegant about it.

which is peculiar..

I've outsarkied Sarky?

Or something.

Sarky

simu wrote:

I've outsarkied Sarky?

Or something.

I'm scared!

simu

Yarr - rum for all.

Le Rack

no one out sarkies sarky!

/soothing voice/ "its okay"
/me strokes sarky's head and fabulous beard..

simu

I've got a beard too! Really, I do!

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

heh heh hehe....

simu

It's bueno, it really is!

skywalker

Le Rack wrote:

you did it with Kiera now you're doing it with me.

:eek: :eek: :eek:

Le Rack

fine I'll stroke yours too but only if you promise not to out sarky sarky!

Le Rack

skywalker wrote:

:eek: :eek: :eek:

exactly!

Le Rack

not really though....

Son_of_Belial

monkeyfudge wrote:

My moneys on a rim job.

Lol, mine too. I remember a girl I went out with at the start of the year compained after we broke up that if she had known how uncommitted I was to her and our relationship in general (you may read what you will from that, whatever you come up with is likely to be the truth **hangs head in shame**) she's never have slept with me at all. There was some *ahem* "rimming" involved once or twice as well and even though she didn't say no, she didn't quite like it very much either! I know for a fact that after the break up she was very "tender" about the fact that she'd let me do this. She never said she felt violated though. I know there's another girl about four years ago who is extremeely bitter about the fact that she lost her virginity to me. She always thought she was way superior.

amp

This thread is disgusting.

Voted 5