Acceptance speech

BlitzKrieg

IF you were to win an award for the oscars or noble prize or anything really, but an award where you would have to give a small acceptance speech. What sort of speech would you give?



Mine would be.


Walk up slowly, look at the award, then the mike, look at the award again. stare...then lean closely to the mike.

"To quote Keanu Reeves...."



pause




pause


"Woah"


walk away.

bringitdown

LOL ^

I always imagined myself mounting some sort of hybrid Bridget Nielsen / Oliver Reed / George best style drunken rant / performance. But then again who hasn't imagined themselves as Bridget Nielsen? :eek:

Shabadu

I'd like to thank Jesus [THREAD=225541]LOL[/THREAD]

MrJoeSoap

I'd make a massive political statement about the plight of Nepal. That'd shake 'em up good'n'proper.

Pigman II

"Thank you, thank you! Well, the critics said it couldn't be done but it looks like I've I finally won the Star Wars franchise the 'big one' with this best picture award for Episode 7! Rest assured this oscar is going to have pride of place on my mantlepiece alongside the other 3 I've already won tonight for best screenplay, best director and best actor. Finally I'd like to dedicate this award to George Lucas, who sadly committed suicide yesterday."

modular

"Okay, yeah, so, um... Yeah, an oscar - pretty cool, eh? Doesn't get much better than... [sort of trail off]"

Pause

Walk off stage

StupidLikeAFox

''Well, im gonna keep this brief''
*sits down*

Chad ghostal

ColHol wrote:

''Well, im gonna keep this brief''
*sits down*

excellent.


id copy him.

solas

"Thanks!"

Take it

If i won a oscar i would probably be siting at home on the sofa thinking:

balls those tickets i got in the post weren't just another junk mail scam

Crucifix

"Ha, I knew it Jeff, this thing's not real gold" *Smack oscar against podium a few times* Pause "Oh......never mind".

rugbug86

hmm, i think it'd have to be a urine-removing one, somewhere along the lines of thanking everybody i know and giving a little bit about them, how they helped me, etc etc etc.
eg: i'd like to thank my momma for bringing me into the world. my momma is 5 foot tall with brown hair and blue eyes. id also like to thank my poppa, he's taller than momma but with grey hair..............all the way down to i'd like to thank that kebab shop man who served me on the 21st june 2003 for putting extra sauce on the bread.
and go back up again later because i just remembered a few more people
that'd be fun!

ixoy

If I won a Nobel prize (and only in the case of a Nobel prize), I'd go "Happy fu*king birthday to me!"

Chucky the tree

i think a FAther ted style acceptance speech is in order, the same as when he recevies his golden cleric

StupidLikeAFox

''And now to Mr. O'Flaherty, who gave me 39% in my maths exam when i was in first year, looks whos laughing now''

Hugh Hefner

*For an Oscar*

Look at trophy for a good while. Then go to the mic and say, "Note to self: Buy hood ornament security system."

funk-you

oscar? a f*cking oscar? where's the cash prize you cheap b*stards.........knew i should have gone to bingo wit me ma.

stagolee

bringitdown wrote:

LOL ^

I always imagined myself mounting some sort of hybrid Bridget Nielsen / Oliver Reed / George best

...and riding this chimera like beast onto the stage, that would freak 'em out allright

NikNik

Something like Kanye West at the Grammys:

"People asked me what I'd do if I didn't win this award...... (*very long pause*)...................................................
...................
............
......

I guess we'll never know."

*walks away*

Kingsize

"first of all iwould like to thank the almighty satan lord of the infinite darkess without whom i could never have achieved this...
now here is a list of people who are secretly gay"

that'd rattle a few cages at the smash hits awards