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God, those Americans...

  • 14-08-2001 9:46am
    #1
    Qualm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 142 ✭✭


    The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams
    given by the California Department of Transportation's driving
    school (read Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders.)

    Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
    A: What for? He can't see my license plate.

    Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the
    same time?
    A: The pick-up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying,
    "Guns don't kill people. I do."

    Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car?
    A: Always wear a condom.

    Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
    A: Your car.

    Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
    A: Be too sh*t-faced to find your keys.

    Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving.
    A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

    Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive
    lawfully?
    A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.

    Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
    A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute.

    Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing
    yellow traffic light?
    A: The color.

    Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
    A: Heavy psychedelics.

    Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
    A: Carry loaded weapons.


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