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WordPerfect helpline

  • 03-08-2001 10:04am
    #1
    stu_69
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 568 ✭✭✭


    May have been posted before...sorry

    An actual conversation on the WordPerfect helpline. Employee was fired,
    however they are currently suing for "Termination without cause".

    "Ridge Hall computer assistance. May I help you?"
    "Yes, well I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
    "What sort of trouble?"
    "Well I was just typing along and all of a sudden the words went away."
    "Went away?"
    "They disappeared"
    "Hmm. So what does the screen look like now?"
    "Nothing."
    "Nothing?"
    "It's blank, it won't accept anything when I type."
    "Are you still in WordPerfect or did you get out?"
    "How do I tell?"
    "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
    "What's a sea-prompt?"
    "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around the screen?"
    "There isn't any cursor. I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
    "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
    "What's a monitor?
    "It's the thing with a screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a
    little light on it that tells you when it's on?"
    "I don't know."
    "Well then look, on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord
    goes into it. Can you see that?"
    "Yes, I think so."
    "Great. Follow the cord to the plug and tell me if it's plugged into the
    wall."
    ".....Yes it is."
    "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two
    cables plugged into the back of it, not just the one?"
    "No."
    "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other
    cable."
    "...Okay, here it is."
    "Follow it for me and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of
    your computer."
    "I can't reach."
    "Uh huh. Well can you see if it is?"
    "No."
    "Even if you put your knee on something and lean way over?"
    "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it is
    dark."
    "Dark?"
    "Yes, the office light is off and the only light I have is coming in from
    the window."
    "Well turn on the office light then."
    "I can't"
    "No? Why not?"
    "Because there's a power failure"
    "A power............a power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now.
    Do
    you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff the computer came
    in?"
    "Well yes, I keep them in the closet."
    "Good. Go get them and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was
    when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
    "Really? Is it that bad?"
    "Yes I'm afraid it is."
    "Well, alright then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
    "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."




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