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Alcohol Warning

  • 22-05-2001 7:46pm
    #1
    TheWolf
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 801 ✭✭✭


    Due to increasing products liability litigation, American beer brewers have accepted the FDA’s suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers:
    1. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra.
    2. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
    3. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
    4. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
    5. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
    6. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
    7. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
    8. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting your @55 kicked.
    9. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary.
    10. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
    11. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
    12. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.
    13. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
    14. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance in the time-space continuum, whereby gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
    arrrrRRROOOOOOOOOOoooo...


Comments

  • #2
    smoke.me.a.kipper
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,626 ✭✭✭smoke.me.a.kipper


    true, true.
    <font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">"It is hard enough to remember my opinions, without also remembering my reasons for them!"
    -Nietzsche</font>


  • #3
    El Marco
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,031 ✭✭✭El Marco


    Naw its not true.....................Well I don't think so.............................I cant rember. I drink too much. confused.gif
    (Insert quote here)


  • #4
    azezil
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,397 ✭✭✭✭azezil


    yeah i can relate to that, especially :
    <font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">1. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra.</font>
    wink.gif LMAO biggrin.gif
    "just because you're not paraniod, doesn't mean they're not after you!"


  • #5
    Schwarzfahren
    Closed Accounts Posts: 68 ✭✭Schwarzfahren


    same joke posted a few days ago by Lucy_la_morte, but what the hell, LOL again! smile.gif


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