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ROFL

  • 04-04-2001 5:05pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,699 ✭✭✭



    One day Bill complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts, I guess I should see a doctor." His friend offered, "Don't do that. There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker an cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10."

    Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing.After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water.Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks.

    Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off,he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message: Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is
    pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better.

    thought this was rather good myself


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,333 ✭✭✭Celt


    aye t'was great biggrin.gif


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,592 ✭✭✭✭Dont be at yourself


    chuckle... the marvels of medicine :\


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,626 ✭✭✭smoke.me.a.kipper


    hehehe. LMAO.

    I'm going to give that 5, yes! 5!, tongue.gif's out of 5 on the patented smoke-me-a-kipper tongue.gif emoticon scale.
    here they are.....
    tongue.giftongue.giftongue.giftongue.giftongue.gif

    Accept no substitutes. Buy only authentic smoke-me-a-kipper emoticon scales!!

    -ciaran
    ciaran@ieatcatsforfun.com
    smoke-me-a-kipper@ihateclowns.com

    This post has been brought to you by the letter C, and the number 7.

    [This message has been edited by smoke-me-a-kipper (edited 05-04-2001).]


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,984 ✭✭✭✭Lump


    Nice one.

    John


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,467 ✭✭✭Lucifer


    good!!!!!!!!!


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