what number are you ??

Catch_22

How hungover are you today? Below is Mozz and Whitey's system of rating the
Friday-at-work-post-Thursday-night-capricious-revelry.


> *1 star hangover
> No pain. No real feeling of illness. Your sleep last night was a mere
> disco
> nap which is giving you a whole lot of misplaced energy. Be glad that you
> are able to function relatively well. However, you are still parched. You
> can drink 10 sodas and still feel this way. Even vegetarians are craving
> a
> steakbomb and a side of gravy fries from any truck stop USA.
>
> **2 star hangover
> No pain. Something is definitely amiss. You may look okay but you have
> the
> attention span and mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee you chug
> to
> try and remain focused is only exacerbating your rumbling gut, which is
> craving a rootie tootie fresh and fruity pancake breakfast from IHOP.
> Last
> night has wreaked havoc on your bowels and even though you have a nice
> demeanor about the office, you are costing your employer valuable money
> because all you really can handle is surfing internet porn and writing
> junk
> e-mails.
>
> ***3 star hangover
> Slight headache. Stomach feels crappy. You are definitely a space shot
> and
> so not productive. Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume
> reminds you of the random gin shots you did with your alcoholic friends
> after the bouncer 86'd you at 1:45 a.m. Life would be better right now if
> you were in your bed with a dozen donuts and a meatball sub watching the
> E!
> fashion awards. You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 3
> Snapples
> and a liter of diet coke- yet you haven't peed once.
>
> ****4 star hangover
> Life sucks. Your head is throbbing and you can't speak too quickly or
> else
> you might puke. Your boss has already lambasted you for being late and
> has
> given you a lecture for wreaking of booze. You wore nice clothes but that
> can't hide the fact that you missed an oh-so crucial spot shaving,
> (girls,
> it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars) your
> teeth have sweaters, your eyes look like one big vein and your hair style
> makes you look like a reject from the class picture of Revere High, '76.
> You would shoot your mother for one or all of the following-1. the clock
> to
> strike 6pm. 2. the entire appetizer list from TGIFridays or 3. a time
> machine so you could go back and NOT have gone out the night before.
>
> *****5 star hangoveraka Dante's 4th Circle of Hell.
>
> You have a second heartbeat in your head which is actually annoying the
> employee who sits in the next cube. Vodka vapor is seeping out of every
> pour and making you dizzy. You still have toothpaste crust in the corners
> of your mouth from brushing your teeth.
>
> Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva so your tongue is
> suffocating you. You'd cry but that would take the last of the moisture
> left in your body. Death seems pretty good right now. Your boss doesn't
> even get mad at you and your co-workers think that your dog just died
> because you look so pathetic. You should have called in sick because
> let's
> face it, all you can manage to do is ***** about your state- which is a
> mystery to you because you definitely don't remember who you were with,
> where you were, what you drank and why there is a stranger still sleeping
> in your bed, unaccompanied, at your house. The only thing you can do is
> smoke a bonghit and pass out.
>
> It's when you wake up a few hours later with a lesser star hangover that
> you eat a large pizza, an order of Kung Pao Chicken, a ham and cheese
> omelet and a batch of rice krispie treats.

Doc

3-4

Lump

LOL, Im one, not even that bad. I normally wake up felling 100% the only thing I feel is a bit tired. But nothing you could call a hang over that ****


John

[SN]JAG

i have had 1 *****hangover in my life(looks back to 20th birthday), plenty of **'s and a *** for my 21st.