old timers

nutter

Old Timers Sex-
There's an old couple, both in their 80's, on a sentimental holiday back to
the place where they first met. They're sitting in a pub and he says to her,
"Do you remember the first time we had sex together, over fifty yearsago? We
went behind the bar. You leaned against the fence and I made love to you
from behind."
"Yes", she says, "I remember it well."
"OK", he says, "How about taking a stroll round there again and we can do it
for old times sake?"
"Ooh Henry, you devil, that sounds like a good idea", she answers.
There's a man sitting at the next table listening to all this, having a
chuckle to himself. He thinks, 'I've got to see this,two old timers having
sex against a fence.' So he follows them. They walk haltingly along,
leaning on each other for support, aided by walking sticks. Finally they get
to the back of the bar and make their way to the fence. The old lady lifts
her skirt, takes her knickers down and the old man drops his trousers. She
turns around and as she hangs on to the fence, the old man moves in.
Suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex the watching man has ever
seen. They are bucking and jumping like eighteen-year- olds. This goes on
for about forty minutes. She's yelling "Ohhh God!" He's hanging on to her
hips for dear life. This is the most athletic sex imaginable. Finally, they
both collapse panting on the ground. The guy watching is amazed. He thinks
he has learned something about life that he didn't know. He starts to think
about his own aged parents and wonders whether they still have sex like
this.
After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple
struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on. The guy, still
watching thinks, 'That was truly amazing, he was going like a train. I've
got to ask him what his secret is.' As the couple pass, the guy says to
them, "That was something else, you must have been shagging for about forty
minutes. How do you manage it? Is there some sort of secret?"
"No, there's no secret", the old man says, "except fifty years ago that
****ing fence wasn't electric."

Lump

LOL, Electrical.


LOL


John

cillian_burger_queen

on the same topic-ish
(btw hi im new)

an old man was in bed one night
his wife came in in a negligee
and said
"do you remember the first time we made love i was wearing this negligee"
"yes"
"do you remember what you said to me then"
"yes, i said i'd f**k your brains out and suck off your t*ts"
"and what do you say now?"
he looked at her and said "mission accomplished"

---

sell your soul for $15bn to the eu, just like ireland

OmiOmi

God!!!!!

The first one was one of the best jokes I've ever read!! LOL!!!!!!

The second one is pretty good.. read it b4 tho