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ARE YOU ONE OF THE BOYS?

  • 25-07-2000 11:44pm
    #1
    BossArky
    Moderators, Arts Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 9,588 Mod ✭✭✭✭


    > ARE YOU ONE OF THE BOYS?
    >
    > 1/. When reaching your sexual climax do you?
    >
    > a) Make low moaning sounds in her ear.
    >
    > b) Suck on her neck to produce a love bite.
    >
    > c) Shove your thumb up her **** so she screams her tits off.
    >
    > 2/. You're in bed one night and she whispers "I love you". Do
    >you?
    >
    > a) Whisper back "I love you too".
    >
    > b) Put your **** on her leg and fart.
    >
    > c) Say "Go to sleep dog breath".
    >
    > 3/. After you have made love to your wife do you?
    >
    > a) Hold her in your arms until she falls asleep.
    >
    > b) Wipe your dick on her nightie and turn over.
    >
    > c) Tell the ***** to go get in with the kids.
    >
    > 4/. If you break wind during the night do you?
    >
    > a) Try and cough at the same time and hope she didn't hear.
    >
    > b) Hold her head under the covers laughing your ******** off.
    >
    > c) Blame her and give her a boot.
    >
    > 5/. If she breaks wind do you?
    >
    > a) Be a gentleman and pretend you didn't hear.
    >
    > b) Clout the *****.
    >
    > c) Say "you dirty *****" and shove her out in the back yard.
    >
    > 6/. You come home early and find her in bed with a big buck
    >negro.
    >
    > Do you
    >
    > a) Close the door quietly and clear off.
    >
    > b) Join in and stick it up the negro's **** .
    >
    > c) Dowse them both with petrol and set fire to them.
    >
    > 7/. Your toilet's in the bathroom, you're busting for a crap and
    >
    > she's in the bath. Do you?
    >
    > a) Go next door and use theirs.
    >
    > b) Yell "Move it goat face, the ****in tortoise head's out of
    >the
    >
    > shell".
    > c) Sit next to her making noises like a flock of starlings
    >taking
    > off.
    >
    >
    > 8/. You want sex but it's rag week. Do you?
    >
    > a) Wait until next week.
    >
    > b) ****.
    >
    > c) Get your face in there and come up looking like the man on
    >the
    >
    > Ribena ad.
    >
    > 9/. She announces she is leaving you. Do you?
    >
    > a) Break down in tears and beg her to stay.
    >
    > b) Put up streamers and arrange a street party.
    >
    > c) Empty your nostrils in her face, kick her in the ****, then
    >get
    >
    > ****ed.
    >
    > 10/. She tells you she's having an unwanted baby. Do you?
    >
    > a) Tell her not to worry, we'll manage somehow.
    >
    > b) Belt her in the guts with a cricket bat.
    >
    > c) Sell the house, clean out the bank account and scarper.
    >
    > SCORE: a) 1. b) 2. c) 3.
    >
    > 0 - 15. If brains were spuds, you'd own Ireland.
    >
    > 15 - 29. You must try harder.
    >
    > 30. Congrats. You're one of the boys.


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