the one

LegacyUser

i dont really believe in that crap about ppl finding "the one" but theres one girl who i was fairly friendly with for the past two years but now im in college in dublin and shes in cork. we never went out or anything but we did kiss a few times, nothing serious. she wasnt my first kiss and ive been more "intimate" with other girls so its not that. i dont think a single day goes by that i dont think about her and when meeting other girls i feel like none of them can even compare to her. i would have liked to have had a relationship with her but the whole cork/dublin thing kinda stops that. i thought after a few months in college i would have gotten over her but i havent at all and it wrecks my head knowing that ill never be with her. so basically im just wondering if anybody else has gone or is going through this?

BolBill

Have been there mate. Firstly you need to find out if shes been thinking about you too. Just be straight with her, ask her. Then you'll know whether this is worth pursuing or not. As you don't know how she feels you may be wasting your energy thinking about her so much as it'll never come to anything.
G'luck and don't let the distance bother you.

MistressPandora

Wasn't there another thread very similar to this quite recently?

Sleepy

It's called "the one that got away syndrome", most of us suffer from it from time to time...

tman

yarrrr

i keep telling myself that i'll tell her how i feel next time i see her. always end up pussying out though
(i'm not the original poster btw. i've just been through the same ****)

The_Goose

God i hate when that happens,went through it for years with one girl when i was yopunger, you seriously need to find out weather she feels the same!!!
Just text or ring her and get talking if she s interested she lll stay in contact, i presume the two of ye live in the same area so be both home for christmas, meet up and sort it out!!
Its worse not knowing what could of been!!!!!

Good luck!


john

Rossonero

doodlee wrote:

i dont really believe in that crap about ppl finding "the one" but theres one girl who i was fairly friendly with for the past two years but now im in college in dublin and shes in cork. we never went out or anything but we did kiss a few times, nothing serious. she wasnt my first kiss and ive been more "intimate" with other girls so its not that. i dont think a single day goes by that i dont think about her and when meeting other girls i feel like none of them can even compare to her. i would have liked to have had a relationship with her but the whole cork/dublin thing kinda stops that. i thought after a few months in college i would have gotten over her but i havent at all and it wrecks my head knowing that ill never be with her. so basically im just wondering if anybody else has gone or is going through this?

Yes, me too. How often do you meet? The girl I like, I can only meet maybe once a month, which is too seldom. I'd say there's no need to think that you'll never be with her. You never know. I'd say ask her out a few times over the x-mas hols and take it from there.

CathyMoran

I think that most people have met someone very special at some stage, someone that you will aways reminise about, always wonder how they are. The thing that you have to remember is that they have their faults too - I know, you can see these special people with rose colored glasses...but if they are meant to be they will be, if they are not they are not...

My first love was seven years ago - I decided to stay in contact with him even though it hurt(s) like anything...he has affected my later relationships in that he was similar to my ideal type but I have fallen in love like that again...however he was not meant to be. By all means stay in touch with her, but do not let her overshaddow her life. Best wishes.

Zombienosh

yarrrrrrrr
i'll just have to face it , my gameboy is at the bottom of the sea.

Bright Smile

my gran always says that you could "go to sea in a basket and not drown if it wasnt your time".... whats for you wont pass you, i think we all have to believe in that, it makes decisions less daunting...

isolde

Sleepy wrote:

It's called "the one that got away syndrome", most of us suffer from it from time to time...

also known as "the one i let get away" or the "one i helped push away"...

tinkerbell

Just go and tell her how you feel. Cork to Dublin is not that far away! It's like 2.5 hours on a train!

So either you tell her now or spend the rest of your life wondering. So she either jumps into your arms and tells you she feels the same, or she tells you she doesn't feel that way - even if she does say the latter, at least you'll know and if you're embarrassed, you won't have to see her much anyway! Then you'll know and can move on with your life, with or without her!

Woden

isolde wrote:

also known as "the one i let get away" or the "one i helped push away"...

or "the one you told to go away..."

dundealgan

doodlee wrote:

i dont really believe in that crap about ppl finding "the one" but theres one girl who i was fairly friendly with for the past two years but now im in college in dublin and shes in cork. i would have liked to have had a relationship with her but the whole cork/dublin thing kinda stops that. anybody else has gone or is going through this?

ok, my situation is similar in some ways... my boyfriend lives in the back of nowhere in the south of ireland and i live in the north, a good 150 miles away at least, and we usually cope during the summer when we dont have college. But this year i am on my year abroad, far far away, so i see even less of him! ie. I have seen him once since september, but we cope, u learn to get used to it.

Also, i took a big risk with him, we were just good friends, but i really liked him and decided to take the plunge, and i have never looked back since. (and that was 2 years ago!!)

So i say go for it, no point thinking about what could have been, give it your best shot, and if it doesnt work, hey u can still be good friends!

Good luck!!

LegacyUser

thanks for the feedback/advice. the problem with telling her how i feel is that i tried that a couple of months ago when i was pretty drunk, but she wouldnt listen and kept saying "not now your too drunk" so i backed off. so now i dont really feel like making a fool of myself again but but cos she said "not now" makes me wonder if she actually was interested but didnt wanna talk about it when i was drunk. i really do wanna ask her (in a sober state of mind!) but i keep backing out.

dundealgan

doodlee wrote:

thanks for the feedback/advice. the problem with telling her how i feel is that i tried that a couple of months ago when i was pretty drunk, but she wouldnt listen and kept saying "not now your too drunk" so i backed off. so now i dont really feel like making a fool of myself again but but cos she said "not now" makes me wonder if she actually was interested but didnt wanna talk about it when i was drunk. i really do wanna ask her (in a sober state of mind!) but i keep backing out.

I think leaving alcohol out of the equation is a good move, it just all goes downhill from there, we've all been there, bought the t-shirt!! But if you are going to invite her out for a drink at xmas to break the ice, just take it handy and dont get hammered!

But the fact that you think she might feel the same about u is reason enough to give it a go, you might even find you will have a new woman for under the mistltoe if it all works out!

Let us know how it all works out!!

isolde

Dataisgod wrote:

or "the one you told to go away..."

exactly..

Lex_Diamonds

Or...the one that told you to go away....