easy and cheapest way to cover an ugly exterior wall?

Shellfishfcuker

No point in painting that without sealing it first. Knock off anything loose and then seal it with the likes of Zinsser Peel Stop, THEN paint it.

Andy From Sligo

I still call a Mural Muriel to this day LOL - i remember when Hilda and Stan had the ducks on the wall

Andy From Sligo

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/124142526#Comment_124142526

thanks - its only meant to be a quick and easy and the cheapest cover up job. anything has got to look better than whats there at the moment and what it looks like

Goldengirl

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/124142598#Comment_124142598

Geese ? 😊

My granny had them too .

Ozymandius2011

Have you tried anti damp paint/spray? I use it inside my flat for mould.

Akrasia

What direction does the wall face? You could get wall mounted solar panels and then you could cover the wall and also generate some free electricity. They work pretty well this time of the year when the sun is lower in the sky if you have the right orientation

Andy From Sligo

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/124145494#Comment_124145494

oh to have that kind of money/finances to do that for the initial outlay/startup - its a good idea though all the same

Deregos.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/124142598#Comment_124142598

There you go Andy. People will be so distracted by the geese, that they won't notice the state of the wall.

CelticRambler

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/124136350#Comment_124136350

If you haven't already ordered it, be careful with this. Depending on the wind direction, you might find the whole thing is in flitters after a few good gusts of wind … and you'll be finding bits of Temu plastic ivy all over the garden for the next ten years.

Goldengirl

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/124145848#Comment_124145848

This ...is the best idea , whether real or a muriel 🤗

Andy From Sligo

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/124146585#Comment_124146585

i dont want ISPCA calling around saying why have I nailed geese to my wall! 😄

Andy From Sligo

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/124145925#Comment_124145925

good point - they say UV treated - they dont say Irish gusts protected!

CelticRambler

Maybe a bit too radical, and maybe you'd run into "ownership" problems but what about a trompe l'oeil approach to the tiling suggestion above. It's something that's done a lot in old French churches with lines etched into the surface of the wall dressing to make a rendered or concrete surface look like brick/block.

In your case - and if it didn't cause any problems for the neighbour - you could rig up a cutting guide with some cheap wooden battens, run an angle grinder along the length of it to a depth of about 10mm followed by the vertical cuts at intervals of your choice. Repeat line after line.

At a distance, if most of the wall finish is in reasonable condition, this'd give you the same tiled effect (painted or not, according to your enthusiasm) ; and if it's not in great condition, you'd start to get an "old weathered stone" effect as different areas of the finish crumbled at different rates. In either case, it'd probably look better with irregular spacing of the etched lines.

Andy From Sligo

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/124147328#Comment_124147328

hmmm, thanks. i dont really know. there are so many bits of plaster rendering just falling off or ready to fall off if I even knock it with my knuckles - its in such a bad state. if the plaster was actually stable on the wall it would look OK I suppose . I know for sure now if i took an angle grinder to it that would make more rendering fall off . there are just those grey breezeblocks underneath it as it stands - so if I really did want that brick/block effect all I would need to do its chisel off all the plaster … and its there!