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Ex wife new partner

  • 22-12-2022 11:50pm
    Registered Users Posts: 32 Lgt

    Ex wife has a new partner, we broke up 9 months ago, my decision. She told me tonight that she has met someone. I told her that we will need to set some ground rules regarding the kids and her new partner. She said it is none of my business and the kids won’t be introduced to him for a long time. Called me a hypocrite as I introduced the kids to my girlfriend 6 months ago despite she asked me to wait. I just want the best for my kids and I know they won’t like the new partner especially my oldest. He is too attached to his mother and did not like my girlfriend when introduced to her and he still doesn’t like her but I fear if his mother introduce a new partner he will be devastated. What should I do?


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  • Registered Users Posts: 41 Eldudeson

    Fair play to you for being honest here about introducing your new partner because that doesn't put you in a good light straight away. You say you want the best for your kids and that's the most important thing. I would say that for them to have the best, they need you to be happy, your ex to be happy and for you both to have a good parenting relationship. I would imagine that after splitting only 9 months ago, that's not the easiest thing in the world but stepping back and seeing things from the other persons point of view is always helpful.

    Best of luck.

  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Home & Garden Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 22,181 CMod ✭✭✭✭Pawwed Rig


    She said it is none of my business and the kids won’t be introduced to him for a long time.

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  • Registered Users Posts: 90 ✭✭Alonzo Mosley

    Would you ever stop, you know nothing about the OP or his ex wife. Granted it was him who ended the marriage and you have no idea why; so what's all this blessing in disguise sh**e. OP you have every right to know who is being introduced into your childrens' lives but be clever about it.

    Get as much information in a nice way from your ex, don't be blinded into thinking they won't like him, he might be a good guy. Ask the kids themselves how they are feeling. There is nothing you can do regarding who you wife brings into their lives but be there so listen and support them.

    Best of luck hope it all goes well.

  • Registered Users Posts: 376 ✭✭HazeDoll

    We do know why he ended it. There was a thread on the subject. He is not the hero of this story in any sense.

  • Registered Users Posts: 90 ✭✭Alonzo Mosley

    No explanation !!! Are you mad??? So it's ok if she pops out and leaves the kids with a nutjob?

    If you were in the same situation would you be ok leaving your kids with someone you know absolutely nothing about. It doesn't matter what OP has done in the past whether he ended it or not. As he says "I just want the best for my kids". Maybe you don' t have kids .....

  • I am in the same boat , suck it up and keep the kids happy and ensure they always feel wanted

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  • Registered Users Posts: 75 ✭✭Unsupervised


    Now turn it around.

    Do you think its ok for the OP to leave the kids with his “Nutjob” girlfriend?

    Put your feet in the wife’s shoes…If you were in the same situation would you be ok leaving your kids with someone you know absolutely nothing about.

    Are You saying that the wife doesn’t want the best for her kids after her husband walked out on her even though the OP stated she is the primary career?

    Seems like you as well as the OP think that only one side of the relationship are allowed to move on.

    Maybe you don’t have kids….

  • Administrators Posts: 13,009 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips

    @Alonzo Mosley and @Unsupervised you are not regular posters in the Personal/Relationship Issues forum so I would ask you to please read The Forum Charter before posting again. We have a very specific charter in this forum.

    All replies in this forum are expected to be directed to the OP and offer mature constructive advice. Getting into over and back argument with other posters does nothing to help an OP who is looking for advice.

  • Registered Users Posts: 984 ✭✭✭Still stihl waters 3

    Your eldest will have to learn to deal with it, as will you

  • Administrators Posts: 13,009 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips

    3 off topic posts deleted. 2 accounts forum banned for being a duplicate account.

    1. It should be a positive that another man has arrived on the scene to take all her shít. That should be a godsend. A huge step in your own personal liberation. But you can't see it.
    2. I'd be far more bothered if I were paying the mortgage on a home to which the ex is bringing some evidently desperate man back (With all the childless women, who else but a desperate man would hook up with a woman with kids?). That's a kick in the goolies, a very public humiliation. Imagine how she would feel if she had to pay the mortgage on the accommodation to which you bring your new woman back?

  • Administrators Posts: 13,009 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips

    @Emiliano Lively Grits there's a whole lot of guesswork and presumption in your post that adds nothing to the thread. Please read the Forum Charter before posting in Personal Issues again.

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  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Arts Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 20,598 CMod ✭✭✭✭amdublin

    Read over what you have said what your ex wife did and what you said you did. And how you reacted when she told you.

    Can't you see how much of a big ol hypocrite your actions are displaying you to be?